Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!

Limericks

Carl reads three news-related limericks: A Cubicle Status Update, Runaway Brides, and a Pajama Upgrade.

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PETER SAGAL, Host:

Coming up, it's Lightning Fill in the Blank. But first, it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme. If you'd like to play on air, call or leave a message at 1-888-Wait-Wait. That's 1-888-924-8924. Or you can click the contact us link on our website, waitwait.npr.org.

C: how to make your truck your home.

Hi, you're on WAIT WAIT...DON'T TELL ME!

JEFF JORDAN: Hi, this is Jeff Jordan. I'm from Griffin, Georgia.

SAGAL: Hey, how are things in Griffin, Georgia?

JORDAN: Very nice, thank you.

SAGAL: I'm glad to hear it. Now, I don't know where Griffin is. Where is it?

JORDAN: It's about 20 miles south of the Atlanta airport. So if you've ever been through here in the airport, you've been near Griffin.

SAGAL: I have. I sensed a certain Griffin-ness.

JORDAN: That was it. That's why you were there for three hours.

SAGAL: Yes, exactly. Well, welcome to the show.

JORDAN: Thank you.

SAGAL: Now, Carl Kasell, of course, is going to perform for you three news-related limericks with the last word or phrase missing from each. If you can fill in that last word or phrase correctly in two of the limericks, you will be a big winner. Ready to go?

JORDAN: I'm ready.

SAGAL: Here's your first one.

CARL KASELL, Host:

At work we are wishing we knew just how well we all do what we do. Finding out once a year won't assuage half our fears, so we're getting a daily?

JORDAN: Flu. I don't know.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Well, it's a two-word answer. It rhymes with new. Or a two-syllable answer, rather. It rhymes with we knew, we do.

CHARLIE PIERCE: You get a yearly?

JORDAN: I don't know.

SAGAL: How about review?

JORDAN: How about that? Oh, review, that's it.

PIERCE: Hey, you got it right.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

PIERCE: Peter, that was a great hint.

SAGAL: It was.

KYRIE O: Yeah.

SAGAL: Well every employee hates the annual performance review, but according to the Wall Street Journal, things are about to change. Get ready for the daily performance review in your workplace. Look for feedback like: He's got a good attitude, but he's unable to complete any major projects because of the constant performance reviews.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: All right, you still have two more chances. Let's get these right. Here is your next one.

KASELL: Some wedding traditions grow weaker, but footwear is getting much sleeker. I say my "I dos" in rubber-soled shoes. Yes, I'm wearing white bridal?

JORDAN: Sneakers.

SAGAL: Yes, indeed.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Bridal sneakers. A Paris bridal salon introduced a line of high-fashion satin bridal sneakers. They are flying off the shelves. They're perfect for the modern bride who values comfort over style, and wants to be able to quickly flee, either from the marriage or towards the next one.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Endorsement deals are already in the works. From the makers of Chuck Taylors, how about Liz Taylors.

PIERCE: Apparently not.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Right. Here is your last limerick.

KASELL: In bed we are joined by our pup. The boy kicks in his sleep. I jump up. Some plastic I sew to protect what's below. My jammies now feature a?

JORDAN: Cup.

SAGAL: Yes, indeed.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

CONNOR: Wow.

SAGAL: Every parent of young children knows about this. You go to sleep in your own comfy bed. You wake up in the middle of a cage wrestling match between yourself and a bunch of toddlers who had nightmares, and they each have two knees that act like crotch-seeking missiles.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: So, one Australian inventor, and presumably a parent, is now selling pajamas with heavy duty padding in the key region. That's an alternative to the simple solution, don't have kids.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

PIERCE: Well, if you wear those pajamas, you're not going to have to worry about that.

SAGAL: That's true.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Carl, how did Jeff do?

KASELL: Well, Jeff had two correct answers, Peter, so he wins our prize. Congratulations, Jeff.

SAGAL: Well done.

JORDAN: Thank you very much.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Congratulations, Jeff, and thanks so much for playing.

JORDAN: Appreciate it. Glad to be here.

SAGAL: Bye-bye.

JORDAN: Bye-bye.

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