Opening Panel Round

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Our panelists answer questions about the week's news: Why is there an app for that?

PETER SAGAL, host: We want to remind everybody they can join us here most weeks at the Chase Bank Auditorium. For tickets and more information, go to And you can find a link at our website,

Right now, panel, time for you to answer some questions about this week's news. Tom, good news for parents who need a little help understanding their teenage boys. There's a new Smartphone app that will tell you if your son is what?


TOM BODETT: I'm glad they didn't have that when I was a teenager. You know, I need a hint. That's so broad.

SAGAL: Well, a yes result gives you a rainbow display and a link to buy tickets to a Lady Gaga concert.




BODETT: They have a gay app?


SAGAL: They have a gay - it's called the Is Your Son Gay app. It came out of France. It's for android. And thanks to it, you won't have to be clueless and obtuse without technological help. You just answer these 20 easy and offensive questions.


SAGAL: And you can begin preparing for a future devoid of grandchildren. Not because gay people don't have kids but because your child will never speak to you again.


BODETT: What are these questions?

SAGAL: The questions are

BODETT: Is your son making his own drapes?

SAGAL: Almost. The questions are, some of them are: does it take him a long time to do his hair? Does he like musicals? Does he read the sports pages? Presumably you're looking for a no answer there, but maybe there are good pictures of athletes, who knows? There's a similar app but it's for the kids. It's called: Is Your Parent a Moron?


SAGAL: And there's just one question: Does your parent have that "Is Your Son Gay app"?



MAZ JOBRANI: So you have to have the kid take the test?

SAGAL: No. Well, presumably, you're like - I guess so.

JOBRANI: Oh, you answer for the kid.

SAGAL: You answer for the kid. It's like a little quiz, and you're like - you know your child.

JOBRANI: What if you're not sure and you're like yeah, yeah, and you're like wait a minute, that's me, I'm gay?

SAGAL: Oh god.


SAGAL: It can help you.

FAITH SALIE: You know what?

SAGAL: What?

SALIE: Back in my day.

SAGAL: In your day.

SALIE: It was totally low tech. I didn't know it at the time, but I have one gay brother and one straight brother.

SAGAL: Yeah.

SALIE: Looking back, one brother had a poster of Farah Fawcett on his wall, the other brother had an 8x10 glossy of Joan Rivers.


SALIE: That's better than any app, right? It's right there in your face.

BODETT: So which one was gay?

SAGAL: Yeah.


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