Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!

Panel Round Two

More questions for the panel: A Little Chin Music, Eau de Pontiff, Putting Six Elbows On The Bar.

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CARL KASELL: From NPR and WBEZ-Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT...DON'T TELL ME!, the NPR News quiz. I'm Carl Kasell. We're playing this week with Charlie Pierce, Faith Salie and Roy Blount, Jr. And here again is your host, at Centennial Hall in Tucson, Arizona, Peter Sagal.

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PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Thank you, Carl. Thanks to all of you. In just a minute, Carl stars in the new film from the Cohen Brothers, "Rhyming Arizona."

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SAGAL: A little local tribute for you there.

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SAGAL: It's our Listener Limerick Challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-Wait-Wait, that's 1-888-924-8924. Right now, panel, some more questions for you from the week's news. Roy, hockey has got them, baseball's got them, now brawls in the audience have made it to a new venue. What?

ROY BLOUNT: Brawls in the audience have made it to a new venue.

SAGAL: Yeah.

BLOUNT: Opera.

SAGAL: Close, I'll give it to you. The symphony.

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SAGAL: The symphony, it happened in Chicago.

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SAGAL: Audience members at the Chicago Symphony Orchestra were shocked last Thursday when out of nowhere something interesting happened.

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SAGAL: According to one symphony goer, who sounded exactly like you'd expect him to, quote, "we heard a rather loud thump." Two patrons in the elite seats had started throwing punches. Either it was that old early versus late Bach debate or the men had misinterpreted what the term "box seats" means.

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SAGAL: The audience was appalled. Many of them even woke up.

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CHARLIE PIERCE: Peter, may I tell a story that's apropos?

SAGAL: You may, Charlie.

PIERCE: Three years ago, I had the honor of reading "The Night Before Christmas" with the Boston Pops.

SAGAL: Oh wow.

PIERCE: So I came out and you know, you're in Symphony Hall and this enormous orchestra behind you. And I'm scared to death and I'm standing behind the podium and I know I'm going to say Blitzen wrong and swear or something and never be invited back again. So I sat there and they're hmmm behind me. And all of the sudden, the guy in front of me just belts the guy in the next chair.

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SAGAL: Just belts him?

PIERCE: Yeah, the guy belts him in the next chair. The guy goes down and he picks up the chair and goes after the other guy. I told the conductor, I'm not working this bucket of blood again.

SAGAL: That was terrible.

PIERCE: I'm going back to the Roadhouse where it's safe. Until you guys put up the chicken wire right here, I'm not doing this.

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BLOUNT: There you go.

PIERCE: So it's not unprecedented.

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SAGAL: Roy, it's a right of passage these days for celebrities to release a signature scent: Justin Bieber, Katy Perry, they're all hawking perfumes. This week, we learned of another who has joined that roster. Who?

BLOUNT: It's a real celebrity, one of the biggest celebrities in the world. I happen to know the answer to this. It is the pope.

SAGAL: It is Pope Benedict XVI, yes.

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SAGAL: Italian perfumer Silvana Casoli creates perfumes for both Madonna and Sting. So it seemed natural that she would be the one chosen to create a fragrance for another famous gay icon.

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SAGAL: But unlike your average celebrity scent, this perfume is meant for the Pope's use only. Casoli says the perfume's infused with some of the Pontiff's favorite things: lemon, fresh spring grass, tree blossoms and anything that covers up the smell of old guy.

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SAGAL: So like I said, it's only for his use but we're hoping, you know, the Vatican had some trouble recently, they may need some income. Maybe he'll sell it. Can you imagine the glossy TV ads for the pope's perfume? A room with white billowing curtains, a gorgeous model sweeps into view, her gown swirling along her long legs. She whispers, "I'm wearing Pope."

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PIERCE: Well, the reason they can't sell it, Peter, is the only way you can make it work is if there's a little priest following behind you with a little thing burning.

SAGAL: Yes.

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SAGAL: Maybe he's going to create like a pope product empire. He can sell jeans: "nothing gets between me and my Benedicts."

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SAGAL: How about breakfast cereal? Frosted Mini Popes.

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SAGAL: He can be in the ad. You know, it's like hey, let's give this cereal to Popey, Popey condemns everything.

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SAGAL: Oh look, Popey likes it.

Charlie, according to a study published in Science magazine, if male fruit flies are unable to mate, they do what instead?

PIERCE: Weep sadly into their drinks.

SAGAL: Exactly right.

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SAGAL: They go get drunk.

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SAGAL: This explains why fruit fly bartenders have to hear so many sob stories.

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PIERCE: You know what's really pathetic is when you see the fruit fly trying to push F3 on the jukebox so he can listen to Sinatra. He just can't make the little feet work.

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SAGAL: Scientists discovered this.

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SAGAL: I'm sorry. What is like a fruit flies dirge song in the wee small hours of the one morning I get to live.

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SAGAL: Scientists did this. They divided the male fruit flies into two groups. One of them got to mate with females. The others were prevented from getting lucky. Then they gave both groups a choice of foods and the frustrated boy flies picked food that had been spiked with alcohol consistently. Scientists explained this phenomenon. They say that alcohol can stimulate the same reward centers in the brain as sex does. That's true for fruit flies and people.

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SAGAL: Then even more eerie, the male fruit flies then kept buying alcohol spike foods for the female fruit flies in the hopes that the females would lower their standards.

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PIERCE: And you know that drosophila always looked better at closing time.

SAGAL: I know, terrible.

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SAGAL: One of the fruit flies ate so much alcohol spike foodstuff that it woke the next morning next to a month. He was like, oh.

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SAGAL: It's like, oh my god, he's lying there with the moth. He's like, I don't even known its genus. What am I going to do?

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PIERCE: I know, I'll tell her I'll call her this weekend. I'll be dead long before that.

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