• Playlist
  • Download
  • Embed
    Embed <iframe src="" width="100%" height="290" frameborder="0" scrolling="no">
  • Transcript

Carl reads three news-related limericks: Feeding Babies is for the Birds; A Cadillac That's Also a Massage Therapist; An Expo for Exes.


Coming up, it's Lightning Fill in the Blank. But first, it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme. If you'd like to play on air, call or leave a message at 1-888-Wait-Wait. That's 1-888-924-8924. You can click the contact us link on our website

There you can find out about attending our weekly live shows here at the Chase Bank Auditorium in Chicago and also check out the latest "How to do everything" podcast. This week, Mike and Ian explain how to talk to an alligator. Hi, you're on WAIT WAIT...DON'T TELL ME!

JIM GARRISON: Hi, Peter. This is Jim Garrison from Chesapeake, Virginia.

SAGAL: Hey, nice to talk to you, Jim. What do you do there in Chesapeake?

GARRISON: Well I'm a retail store manager for a local swimming pool company.

SAGAL: Oh, so you sell all that cool swimming pool stuff?

GARRISON: Yes, absolutely.

SAGAL: Do you specialize in like noodles, floats and other games?

GARRISON: Yeah, yeah, the fun stuff, exactly.

SAGAL: What's like the next fun thing you can do in your pool?

GARRISON: Oh, you know, that's a good question. Get the family together and have a good time.

SAGAL: How do you sell that though?


SAGAL: Jim, welcome to our show. Carl Kasell will now read for you three news-related limericks with the last word or phrase missing from each. If you can fill in that last word or phrase correctly on two of the limericks, you'll be a big winner. Ready to go?

GARRISON: Absolutely, let's do it.

SAGAL: Here's your first one.

CARL KASELL: Simple etiquette just might preclude a bird-like transmittal of food. But mothers know best. We help tots digest by serving them bites we've pre?





SAGAL: Yes, chewed. Actress Alicia Silverstone got a lot of attention recently when she posted a video of herself pre-chewing her child's food. They say, it's a new trend among the insufferable. They claim...


SAGAL: It's a more natural way to feed babies, harkening back to the days when humans were raised by giant birds.


SAGAL: How are kids going to get over this? Twenty years from now this kid is going to be, you know...

ADAM FELBER: Still eating that way.

SAGAL: Yeah, he's going to take out the girl he wants to marry and say, I've got a question to ask, darling. But first, would you mind softening up my steak?


SAGAL: All right, here's your next limerick.

KASELL: My car tells me when I should brake and which steering corrections to make. A warning will shoot from the seat to my glute, as the car gives my butt a firm?





SAGAL: GM has developed a new vibrating seat function that alerts drivers when they're straying out of their lane. If you veer left, the left side of the seat vibrates. If you veer right, the right side vibrates. If you're driving straight and your butt still vibrates, you're sitting on your phone.


SAGAL: Here is your last limerick.

KASELL: When lost in the battle of sexes, starting over quite often perplexes. Our convention's a hit for the couples that split. All our booths are set up to help?


SAGAL: Yes, exes, very good.



SAGAL: After a terrible divorce, what is the first thing you want to do? If you answered go to a convention center crammed with thousands of shell-shocked newly single people, then you're in luck. Last weekend marked the first-ever divorce expo in New York. Attendees browsed hundreds of stalls - that was like an "oh," because you missed it. I understand.


SAGAL: You're sad. Attendees browsed hundreds of stalls offering lawyers, makeover tips, cheap vodka. Shouldn't they do this before people get divorced as a deterrent? And what would they have at "married for 25 years expos"? A booth with directions to the Divorce Expo?


ROY BLOUNT JR.: Rebound parties.

SAGAL: Yes. Carl, how did Jim do on our quiz?

KASELL: Well Jim, you had three correct answers, so I'll be doing the message on your voicemail or home answering machine.

SAGAL: Well done.


GARRISON: Thank you.

SAGAL: Thank you so much. It was great to have you on the show.

GARRISON: My pleasure.

SAGAL: Take care.

GARRISON: Thanks, bye-bye.


Copyright © 2012 NPR. All rights reserved. Visit our website terms of use and permissions pages at for further information.

NPR transcripts are created on a rush deadline by a contractor for NPR, and accuracy and availability may vary. This text may not be in its final form and may be updated or revised in the future. Please be aware that the authoritative record of NPR’s programming is the audio.



Please keep your community civil. All comments must follow the Community rules and terms of use, and will be moderated prior to posting. NPR reserves the right to use the comments we receive, in whole or in part, and to use the commenter's name and location, in any medium. See also the Terms of Use, Privacy Policy and Community FAQ.