Young Adult Fiction

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You may have a New York Times brain, but we know you've still got a Scholastic News heart. Ophira Eisenberg feeds some of your favorite childhood books through the Five-Dollar Word Machine for our contestants. Can you figure out the original titles without your thesaurus?

OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

All right, what do you say we get this puzzle started?

JOHN CHANESKI: That sounds like a good idea.

EISENBERG: Let me introduce our first two contestants. We have Alix Claps and Danny Errico.

(APPLAUSE)

ALIX CLAPS: Hi.

DANNY ERRICO: Hi.

EISENBERG: Thank you so much for joining us. Alix, I hear you're a big theater and music geek and a production manager at NYU.

CLAPS: That's true.

EISENBERG: Fantastic. What's your favorite musical?

CLAPS: "Kiss of the Spider-Woman."

EISENBERG: Ooh, good answer already. And Danny, you're an author that likes to write in rhyme. Do you have a sample rhyme that's a favorite?

ERRICO: Sure. But I write for kids, so this one isn't for kids but...

EISENBERG: Okay.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: I like that you preface...

ERRICO: It's not scandalous or anything. Rhyming is a fickle game, it ebbs before it flows. Is it brilliant, is it lame, the trick is no one knows.

EISENBERG: Nice.

(APPLAUSE)

CHANESKI: That totally rhymes.

EISENBERG: And clearly inappropriate for children.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Children would be scandalized. All right, we're starting off with a little number we call Adult Young Fiction. We're going to give you famous titles of books for children or young adults, but we've swapped out the words for fancy ten-dollar synonyms.

For example, have you read Dr. Seuss' classic book The Tabby in the Chapeau? You might know it as "The Cat in the Hat." Okay. So contestants, ring in when you know the answer. Where the barbarous entities abide?

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Danny?

ERRICO: "Where the Wild Things Are."

EISENBERG: Correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Emerald Ova and Haunch.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Danny?

ERRICO: "Green Eggs and Ham."

EISENBERG: "Green Eggs and Ham."

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Those are my tax attorneys, by the way, Emerald, Ova...

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: The ghostly fee collection berth. Danny gave me a puzzled look and Alix not happy either.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: A couple more seconds, it's...

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

ERRICO: "The Phantom Tollbooth."

EISENBERG: Danny with "The Phantom Tollbooth." That is correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: You are in the kingdom of wisdom. The feline, the enchantress and the chiffonier.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Danny?

ERRICO: "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe."

EISENBERG: That is correct.

(APPLAUSE)

CLAPS: I'm not sure my buzzer works.

EISENBERG: You're not sure your buzzer works.

CLAPS: I'm not sure my buzzer works.

EISENBERG: Do you want to give it a shot?

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: It works.

(LAUGHTER)

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: You have time, Alix. You have time. So let's see how this one goes. The conferring topiary.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Alix?

CLAPS: "The Secret Garden."

EISENBERG: That is incorrect; I'm sorry. The conferring topiary.

ERRICO: If you could tell me what a topiary is, that would help.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Does anyone know the answer?

(SOUNDBITE OF AUDIENCE YELLING)

EISENBERG: "The Giving Tree." That is correct. Topiary, tree, which by the way I think is one of the saddest books I've ever read.

CHANESKI: It's a terrible book and that tree needs to get a little self-respect.

EISENBERG: Yeah, no kidding.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: The tree gives and gives. The boy takes and takes. And at the end, the boy goes "I just took everything."

CHANESKI: Yeah.

EISENBERG: And the tree goes "yep."

CHANESKI: Yep, that's how it goes.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Spoiler alert.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Your next question: a corrugation in chronology.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Alix?

CLAPS: "A Wrinkle in Time."

EISENBERG: Correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: The immoderately voracious lepidopteron.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Alix?

CLAPS: The Hungry, Hungry Caterpillar.

EISENBERG: Hmm...

CLAPS: "The Very Hungry Caterpillar."

EISENBERG: There you go, very good.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Were you thinking about Hungry, Hungry Hippos and you go excited?

CLAPS: I think I did.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: The diminutive dynamo that proved proficient.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Danny?

ERRICO: "The Little Engine that Could."

EISENBERG: "The Little Engine that Could."

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: That is correct. So, Danny, you are our winner of this first round. Congratulations.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: You'll be moving on to our Ask Me One More final round at the end of the show. Another hand for Alix, a great contestant and contender.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Thank you.

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