Celebrity Cross-Breeds

Celebrities like to intermingle. This next game imagines some creative combinations of the rich and famous that make "Brangelina" look tame. For example, if you merged the singer of "Candle in the Wind" with the mobster nicknamed the "Dapper Don," you'd get Elton John Gotti. Saturday night's alright for fighting, indeed.

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OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

Let's bring up our next two fearless contestants. We have Diana Tenery and Samantha Boardman.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Diana, you are a hard-core competitive bridge player.

DIANA TENERY: Sort of.

EISENBERG: Sort of. That's not how a bridge player talks about themselves, Diana. I know that you're the real thing. So watch it, Samantha, you have some big heat over here, all right? But Diana, I want you to know that Samantha is a voice actress, and matter of fact, you can hear her when you call 311 in New York City, as she is the voice.

SAMANTHA BOARDMAN: That's true.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Can you give me a - what do you say when we call? What is your voice?

BOARDMAN: It's like "welcome to 311 in New York City. We're here to help, but if it's an emergency call 911" and then it goes into alternate side, et cetera, et cetera.

EISENBERG: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHN CHANESKI: You're not really selling it, Samantha.

EISENBERG: But that is you.

BOARDMAN: It is. It is.

EISENBERG: Yeah, all right.

BOARDMAN: Yeah.

EISENBERG: We're going to play some games with you that I think you're going to be able to deal well with.

CHANESKI: I hope so.

EISENBERG: Jonathan, what is the game?

JONATHAN COULTON: We're going to do some genetic engineering. We're going to merge the names of two celebrities to create a new mega celebrity. We call this game Celebrity Crossbreeds.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: So here's an example. If I merged the singer of "Candle in the Wind" with the mobster nicknamed the "Dapper Don," you would get Elton John Gotti.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: So you see, it's Elton John and John Gotti. The last name of the first celebrity is the first name of the second celebrity.

EISENBERG: Saturday night's all right for fighting.

COULTON: That's right.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: In this case, it is particularly all right for fighting, that's right.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: So whoever gets more right will move on to our final round at the end of the show. Are you ready?

BOARDMAN: Ready.

TENERY: Definitely.

COULTON: He spent a Saturday in detention with "The Breakfast Club" followed by 27 years in prison for fighting apartheid.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Samantha?

BOARDMAN: Judd Nelson Mandela.

COULTON: That's right.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: This perennial NBA all-star has led the LA Lakers to five championships while co-hosting NBC's "Today Show" with Jane Pauley.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Diana?

TENERY: Kobe Bryant Gumbel.

COULTON: Yes.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: This rapper won two Grammys as a member of the Fugees but he received the Nobel Prize in Literature as a leading exponent of French existentialism.

(LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Samantha?

BOARDMAN: Who is Wyclef Jean-Paul Sartre?

COULTON: Yes.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: Fantastic, yeah.

EISENBERG: That was awesome. Gone until November is just a meaningless construct of time.

COULTON: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: In "The King's Speech," this Academy Award winning actor played an inflammatory conservative radio talk show host fighting his addiction to oxycodone.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Diana?

TENERY: Jeffrey Rush Limbaugh.

COULTON: That's right.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: They are tied.

COULTON: It is all tied up, very exciting.

This Hawaiian singer is best known for his rendition of "Tiny Bubbles" as well as his leadership of the Communist Party of Vietnam.

(LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Diana?

TENERY: Don Ho Chi Minh.

COULTON: That's right.

(APPLAUSE)

TENERY: That's just wrong.

EISENBERG: It's fun to say, though, right?

TENERY: It's just wrong.

EISENBERG: I love it.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: You're right. It's wrong in a lot of ways.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: Her experience winning the individual and team gold medals in the 2012 London Olympics inspired her humorous science fiction novel "The Hitchhiker's Guide to Gymnastics."

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Diana?

TENERY: Gabby Douglas Adams.

COULTON: Yes.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: I'm impressed.

COULTON: His breakout performance of "Momma Said Knock You Out" on MTV Unplugged came as a shock after his decades as the megalomaniacal director of the FBI.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: Samantha?

BOARDMAN: Who is LL Cool J Edgar Hoover.

COULTON: Yes.

(LAUGHTER)

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Yep, well, that - everyone should get a point for saying LL Cool J Edgar Hoover in their brain.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Diana, you won by one point. That was a very close match.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: You'll be moving on to our Ask Me One More final round at the end of the show. Well done. That was very fun. I like that.

COULTON: That was very fun.

EISENBERG: They were excellent. Yeah, I didn't think anyone would get the Wyclef Jean-Paul Sartre.

COULTON: Wyclef Jean-Paul Sartre.

EISENBERG: I know, but that was incredible. All right, LL Cool extraordinaire.

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