Christy Lilley

Being On Bed Rest: Boredom, Guilt And Lots Of Online Shopping

Christy and James, with their four-legged friend, Max i i

Christy and James, with their four-legged friend, Max Courtesy of Christy Lilley hide caption

itoggle caption Courtesy of Christy Lilley
Christy and James, with their four-legged friend, Max

Christy and James, with their four-legged friend, Max

Courtesy of Christy Lilley

I've been on bed rest for two weeks now. I was recently diagnosed with pregnancy-induced hypertension, but because I experienced preeclampsia in my first pregnancy, I am being monitored very closely by my doctors to see if I develop it again.

I have many of the warning signs — headaches, blurred vision, swelling, hyperreflexia — but so far bed rest has kept my blood pressure controlled, and the baby looks great.

During this time, many people have told me that they are jealous of me, that bed rest is just like being on vacation, or they wish they could trade places with me.

When I was working full time, I admit it, I too thought that bed rest would be great. I'd read books, catch up on TV shows and movies I never have time to watch, put all the photos that have been stacking up into photo albums, finally work on my son James' baby book and just relax.

About Christy

Christy Lilley, 32, lives in Charlotte, N.C. Already the parents of a toddler, she and her husband, Jim, welcomed Diana Marie on July 7.

Well let me tell you, bed rest is not easy. I was not prepared for how much guilt I would feel. Guilt about not being able to do as much with James, guilt about not being able to help out at home, and guilt about not being able to go to work. Because everything happened so quickly, I did not have time to wrap things up at work and get things in order for my leave. I feel guilty knowing that someone has to take on my workload almost six weeks earlier than planned.

Plus, even though I'm home all day, every day, we've had to keep James in day care — bed rest would be impossible if I had to chase after a 20-month-old toddler every day. With no family around to help, we have no other option. It is so hard knowing that I'm at home and he's not here with me.

I try to read or watch TV, but for some reason I can't concentrate. I read a few pages or watch a few minutes of a show, and my mind just wanders.

One thing I have managed to do is spend way too much money shopping online. It's unbelievable what you can buy on the Internet and have it delivered right to your doorstep two days later.

Soap.com and Diapers.com are amazing: You can buy diapers, toilet paper, shampoo, laundry detergent, saran wrap — anything really, all without leaving the comforts of your home.

I make at least one purchase a day on Amazon.com. I've stocked up on coffee, sunscreen, printer cartridges, photo albums, books and DVDS, to name a few things.

I've also bought another double stroller, a new baby bathtub, new pajamas and shoes for James, plus a number of adorable handmade items on Etsy.com.

James on a slide i i
Courtesy of Christy Lilley
James on a slide
Courtesy of Christy Lilley

It's not like we really need most of these things. I've also been shopping for clothes for myself, even though I never leave the house except to go to the doctor. And thank God for online grocery shopping — it's been a life saver.

Bed rest is also really lonely. I'm alone all day just thinking and worrying about anything and everything. I worry about the baby, work, taking care of two kids, and all the things that need to be done before the baby arrives — laundry, organizing, scrubbing and cleaning the house top to bottom, stocking the freezer with meals, installing the car seat, and taking out the swing, cradle and other baby gear.

My nesting instinct has kicked in with full force, but I can't do anything about it. Luckily I have my dog Max with me. He's a great companion, and I talk to him way more than any human should probably talk to a dog.

We made it to 36 weeks, and that was our next big hurdle. We're hoping we can make it at least another week so the baby can get to 37 weeks. That would make it all worth it.

Editor's Note (Tuesday, June 28, 3:05 p.m.): Since Christy wrote this post, her doctor took her off bed rest. We'll hear more from her later this week.

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