For me it's willingness to travel. My coworkers are surprised when I take a weekend off to go to a music fetival or a day off to travel to a show. I feel like otherwise we would never discuss music and they would never know about my secret fandom. Instead, they say to each other, "Where's Jo?" "Oh, she went for Florida for some music festival..."

Sent by Jo | 12:37 PM ET | 09-15-2008

"There's still something beautiful about a threadbare concert T-shirt". Especially when the band is called Threadbare.

Sent by John Skelton | 1:01 PM ET | 09-15-2008

Jesus Carrie, I don't know about anyone else who read this entry, but paragraphs 3,4 and 5 are me in a nutshell over the past 6 years and i am 31 now. Is it an age thing? Teenagers these days don't know or probably don't care what they are missing since the advent of the internet much less the MP3. You don't need album art, lyrics or the band photo that comes packaged with a record when you can google whatever you info you want and download it to the desktop of your computer for free and in 1 millisecond.

Sent by Abi | 1:05 PM ET | 09-15-2008

"an album so worn that the needle can't find its groove"

Wow, that's some great turn of phrase.

Sent by Samuel | 1:10 PM ET | 09-15-2008

Last.fm! Rateyourmusic.com!

I've only ever worn down two CD's enough to render them unplayable (Radiohead's "The Bends" and Elliott Smith's "Either/Or"). It's sad because I feel so proud of the fact that they're unplayable, yet that'll probably never happen again because they're safe on my hard drive now.

I still buy band t-shirts but they mostly go unnoticed underneath jumpers. Now that I think about it... I guess my love for a band is best measured by the number of songs of theirs I can play on guitar.

Sent by leah | 1:11 PM ET | 09-15-2008

By reading and posting to their blogs. ;)

Sent by JK | 1:32 PM ET | 09-15-2008

I have a chest of drawers completely filled with CDRs and DVDs of live shows of my favorite artists. I have every documented Jeff Tweedy solo show, over 300 Wilco shows, about 100 Wilco/Tweedy/Tupelo videos on DVD. I also have a fair number of Dylan shows.

While I don't trade much these days, I do send out a fair number of shows to newbies, and my co-workers are pretty used to seeing me at the postage machine with my bubble envelopes and discs.

The complete Jandek discography, end to end, is pretty visually impressive, and after someone hears a song or two I think they'd infer that someone with the whole catalog has more than a passing interest.

iTunes play count can not only catalog your interest in a band, it allows you to control the more embarrassing obsessions you might have. I've reset my play counts on more than one occasion to delete evidence of some of my guilty pleasures.

Sent by ljc | 1:34 PM ET | 09-15-2008

Well, some of the ways--joining a band's Facebook group or MySpace page, rallying support for a tour on owngig.com (if they're a European band that never tours the States), making their videos favorites on YouTube...and my friends know how obsessed I am with an artist by the number of times they appear on any given mix that I make for them.

Sent by Brigid | 1:37 PM ET | 09-15-2008

I'm a huge Flock of Seagulls fan, so every month I dye my hair platinum blond and spend hours every morning getting it just right.

http://blahblahblah.beloblog.com/archives/flock.JPG

Seriously, I wear my 1974 Black Sabbath tshirt as an undershirt on occasions when i have to dress up. Although no one gets to see it and im not really proving to anyone that i love Sabbath, but it's my tiny act of rebellion and makes wearing a tie somewhat tolerable.

Sent by tim! | 1:53 PM ET | 09-15-2008

I wear my Cardiacs tshirt from stubborn loyalty, though it is one of the ugliest items of apparel I own.
So glad I didn't get a "Selling England By the Pound" tattoo back in '75.

Sent by schlep | 2:03 PM ET | 09-15-2008

The office iTunes network is probably my most showy display of band love. I'm pretty self-conscious of my own collection; a few times a day I check to see if anyone is connected to my library, and if so, I wonder who, what are they listening to, etc. And I've taken to making 'best of' playlists - not for me per se, but for anyone who is poking around, as a way of passively pointing out my favorite songs by my favorite bands. Also the few remaining band posters I have are hung in my cubicle.

Hmm.. I didn't realize until now how office-centric the social element of music has become in my life!

Sent by nikki | 2:14 PM ET | 09-15-2008

tattoos. that's how i prove my love. and not in an obessive way. but just to say, i am permently scarring my body because this artist(s) make life worth while. because he/she/they make me want to be myself and remember a very moment, idea or situation forever.

Sent by brittani | 2:25 PM ET | 09-15-2008

Set lists... keep your eyes peeled for the setlist, and, if possible, get the band to sign it, even if you just happened to see it by the edge of the stage
-then, of course, frame them.

Sent by Matt | 2:37 PM ET | 09-15-2008

Band shirts,even when I haven't gone to the show, I will happily order them. Instead of brooches, I wear buttons, and I use Last.fm.

In high school, though, I made colleges for my binders. I had a Tegan and Sara themed one and a Sleater-Kinney themed one.

Sent by Kirie | 2:46 PM ET | 09-15-2008

I have a shelf on my PC desk... with over 100 Pearl Jam bootlegs (official and not) I have a stack of Sleater-Kinney bootlegs (over 50 I think) lined up infront of all my other CDs... and off in the other side of my room... I have a bookcase loaded with Elvis movies, a few books, and well over 200 CD's between the bootleg concerts and official releases...

love by bootleg?

but youre not the only one who saves ticket stubs... I know of a few people that do... I have just about every concert ive been too (even the bad ones) have a ton of stubs from baseball games... and even turned one up from a WcW Rassling show me and a few friends went to years ago just for the hell of it...

but my question... is why are you standing in line for tickets at all???
do they even still have that anymore? I thought we all buy tickets off the net now days...

oh yeah, speaking of band shirts... you should see the dirty looks I get from old Ladies when I where "Show Me Your Riffs" out and about... and the last time I had it on, some guy says to me... "yeah I wish the girls would she me their riffs man..."

ah yes... the stupidity of the non-musically educated.

Sent by Kramer | 3:13 PM ET | 09-15-2008

or stupidity by lack of literacy?

what i have found is that i no longer care if someone thinks i am a square. i don't need, or even want, people to know my musical loves. it is too personal, too much to share with people who don't get it. i know it in my heart so i don't care if the people i work with do or not.

this was not the case, say, five years ago, where my office at microsoft was walled with posters.

i have more of my own life and art and don't need someone else's to establish my personality. at least you, carrie, talk with people regularly who get it. those of us in the 9-5 don't have that luxury. but instead of pinning me down like it used to, now it sets me free.

Sent by coyote | 3:39 PM ET | 09-15-2008

I've always found the worshiping of rock stars sad. Their egos are too large. They contribute to our culture of excess.

Sent by Ada | 4:29 PM ET | 09-15-2008

by discrediting others music fav's. i work at a bar so it pretty easy...

them:"hey you like music, you like this?"
me:"no, absolutly not"
them:"you dont like anything, why do i talk to you anyway.."

then that gives me the "in" to chastise that guy who puts on journey, stained, then some everclear song... i try convince them i'm not a bad person...just a music snob..

Sent by Jon | 4:57 PM ET | 09-15-2008

i'm with you on the ticket stubs, every stub from every concert i've been to (except the first 3, beacuse i was only about 10-12 years old and didn't really think about it then). I also get a t shirt at every show i go to, and hey... who said Vinvyl is dead?? I still listen to my vinyl collection, in addition to my ipod... ipod's are for riding the bus or walking to work, but i don't sit around at home with my ipod, i like to play my music outloud at home

Sent by lacy | 6:04 PM ET | 09-15-2008

My favorite was the old sticker on the bumper.

I used to drive an '86 Buick that proudly bore proof of my love of a variety of artists: Bikini Kill, Bad Religion, Foo Fighters, Hazel, and Pearl Jam to name a few.

These days, I rock a modest "Obama '08" in the rear window of my fuel efficient commuter vehicle.

Still, when I find an artist or band I love, it is hard not to scour the internet for bumper-friendly merch.

Sent by Sally | 6:41 PM ET | 09-15-2008

Ugh. Feeling the need to prove ones love for a band is sad and annoying. I do keep stubs though, but for more nostalgic reasons. Which I guess can just be as sad and annoying.

Sent by Brian A. | 7:23 PM ET | 09-15-2008

As an older music fan, I try to keep every format around even though I mostly listen digitally these days. They takes up space but they are a reminder that you should be able to touch and access music in a lot of ways. Besides, what am I going to replace it with -- some piece of ugly furniture?

I have 78s, LPs, 45s, reel-to-reel tapes, cassettes, CDs and mp3s ... and players for all. I was listening to an digital download song the other day that I can first remember having on an 8-track (split in the middle, I think). Shoulda never junked that 8-track player. Anyone got one lying around?

Sent by CDS | 7:58 PM ET | 09-15-2008

I dunno prolly in some digital way...

Sent by Marissa | 7:59 PM ET | 09-15-2008

Sadly, I think one way we prove our love for a band these days is by buying, rather than stealing, their music.

Sent by Andrew | 8:26 PM ET | 09-15-2008

Start a blog. melvillain.blogspot.com

Sent by Melvillain | 8:34 PM ET | 09-15-2008

The same way since high school I don't feel the need to make out in public, I don't feel the need to publicly announce my band love. (I mean, other than here occasionally.)

Sent by E | 8:35 PM ET | 09-15-2008

Bruce Springsteen eh?

I don't wear band tshirts anymore as part of my daily wardrobe. Too many people would ask me what grade I was in, so I thought it was time to 'grow up'. I got a tattoo inspired by my favorite band, mewithoutYou. I guess I've taken it way beyond tshirts and buttons. Maybe 'grow up' isn't quite the direction I am headed in.

http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=viewImage&friendID=257092205&albumID=49030&imageID=12906575

Sent by jonesy | 8:56 PM ET | 09-15-2008

Clever Prince reference.

I prefer to support them as opposed to worship them, separation of church and music. That's my platform.

Sent by kill rock starz | 9:30 PM ET | 09-15-2008

I have two blogs, and I will often use song lyrics to title blog entries (I even did this when hosting the Carnival of Feminists, I'm that much of a dork, but I couldn't let it go by without referencing the Bikini Kill song).
I'll still wear band t-shirts, and if it's a nice day and I'm driving, I'll open the moon roof and let the whole world hear my music.

Sent by Genevieve | 9:43 PM ET | 09-15-2008

I do it by buying a physical copy of new albums.

Sent by Anjanette | 10:23 PM ET | 09-15-2008

I have a big t-shirt collection, most of which are bands/artists. I'm also not shy about pulling down nice band flyers from telephone poles around SE PDX.

As an aside, my girlfriend and I celebrated 2 years together in June. My gift to her? A SK poster (limited edition, of course, by Tara McPherson). It will be framed and proudly hung up in our house. We're both music geeks and not shy about showing it.

Sent by Stacey | 10:30 PM ET | 09-15-2008

Blogging. I listen to a lot of music, but when something particularly captures me I write about it. Some of it is so I can spread the word. Bon Iver needs to be known, and I don't care: Steve Winwood's vocals on "Gimme Some Lovin" deserve recognition in the post-American Idol era. The rest of it is exorcism. I'll get stuck on an album or on a song, and the only way for me to wrench loose is to put down all of my thoughts in tangible order.

Sent by Nick L. | 10:37 PM ET | 09-15-2008

I do have a couple of band t-shirts, but slowly they're going away. I'll be 36 tomorrow, and, I dunno, I'm just gradually shifting to charming buttondowns (seriously, ones with neat patterns), or just plain t-shirts.

Nowadays I show my "band love" mostly by going to their shows and buying their albums, either alone or with friends. It's the music that matters more than anything.

Sent by Michael | 11:08 PM ET | 09-15-2008

I still have all my ticket stubs. And a list on my computer of all the shows that didn't have ticket stubs (or at least all of them that I can remember or had written down somewhere). There are some old setlists around here somewhere, and I still have all the posters from years ago. They're just not on the wall anymore.

I have one music poster in my office. And that only recently replaced the poster of last season's schedule of the local NHL team. Mostly it's the days I take off to drive four states away to watch a couple of reunion shows of one of my favorite bands. Or to drive one state away to catch a couple shows of a band that aren't quite coming far enough south for a local show.

Not that I care if people know what I like. If asked, I tell most people that I "hate everything." I'll nerd it up with other people as obsessive as I am, but for the most part, I'd rather talk about other things with "normal" people.

Sent by John B | 11:46 PM ET | 09-15-2008

Last.fm (http://www.last.fm) is a great tool for keeping track of the music you listen to (at least on your computer). It tracks everything you listen to into easy-to-read charts that you can compare with your friends.

That being said, I still buy and wear band t-shirts. And MP3's haven't caught on as my primary form of listening to music yet. Vinyl is a little too inconvenient and unreliable, but my CD collection is a point of pride. Some of my CDs have become so scratched over the years that I can't even listen to certain tracks.

Sent by Adam | 1:48 AM ET | 09-16-2008

First of all, I definitely buy the physical CD to support the artist. I stay away from buying mp3s only (have you heard of bit rot?) I'm also a packaging nerd and love the design of music cds/albums. If it's a special album (like "Pet Sounds") I'll buy something like the green/yellow 180 gram vinyl reissue.

If they come through town and I can make the show and it's not $100, I'll usually make the effort to go (being in LA, every band comes through this town which is great.) If they have a cool shirt at the concert with a tasteful design (sometimes, you can't even tell it's a concert shirt), I'll pick it up. Finally, I keep all my ticket stubs. My first one was from The Hothouse Flowers 1989 (are they still around) tour at the Moore Theatre in Seattle. One may think this can get expensive but it is not always the case. Take for instance the Fleet Foxes this summer. I bought the new Fleet Foxes vinyl (with bonus EP vinyl) for $14.98. The ticket for the show at Spaceland was only $10! Then, a nice concert tee was only $15. Grand total of $40 for vinyl, show and shirt.

Oh, I'm 38 years old. Do I feel like a kid at times? Sure I'm too much of a music fan to just sit at home and listen to mp3s. In addition, I take guitar and drum lessons (played clarinet and piano too.) Life's too short to be too old for anything. It's all about fun, not worship. Not ready to put all my money into mutual funds/investments and slowly die just yet.

Sent by David | 2:04 AM ET | 09-16-2008

I stole a poster from the CD store today. Ok, actually it was a poster advertising CSS from about 6 months ago (a show I didn't actually go to, and now I regret it). And it was lying on the ground. And it was kind of ripped already. So I just picked it up and kept it. I don't think they will mind. I even bought a CD from them, just to make up for me taking it.

But I buy posters from all the gigs I go to, and I always buy the CD, never download.

I have a really old bag I use for university. Carrying books and such. And I've covered the whole thing with band logos that took me hours to draw on. I've been told to chuck the bag out and get a new one; it's basically held together by a shoelace, but I spent so much effort decorating it. so, the bag stays.

Sent by NC | 5:42 AM ET | 09-16-2008

It's in here, not out there

Sent by Jason | 6:08 AM ET | 09-16-2008

The 'show me your riffs' problem always takes me by surprise because people see what they want to rather than actually reading the text. It makes me feel like saying 'but it's a Sleater-Kinney t-shirt' but they wouldn't know who that was. I made a 'Call the Doctor' T-shirt at art school and made several friends that way. I used to enjoy my collection of ticket stubs but then enjoyed the liberating experience of throwing them all in the bin. It's a clich?? but band t-shirts still imply a bit of anarchy because most clothes don't speak quite so literally.
Maybe they seem more extreme by comparison with modest hi-tech tactics like playlists and blogs? I've never liked metal but I like ginger haired maths students with awful Iron Maiden t-shirts.

Sent by Charles McConnel | 6:32 AM ET | 09-16-2008

This discussion is reflecting an earlier one, about whether the breathless enthusiasm of music fandom keeps us forever young (or if you like, hopelessly immature!)
There's going to be plenty of time for mature dinner parties and serious discussion of what happened to our 401ks at the old folks home.

Sent by schlep | 8:04 AM ET | 09-16-2008

i name my cats after musicians i like. Then everyone knows i like them, since my cats make up 92% of my daily conversations.

Sent by steph | 9:01 AM ET | 09-16-2008

you prove your love by reading their blog lol

Sent by danielle Griffith | 9:21 AM ET | 09-16-2008

Just did some re-arranging in my basement. I came across my tickets and ended up putting them in the cd case or album cover and displayed them. My favorites Stevie Rays last concert at Alpine Valley WI, Bob Dylan (walked past him on the streets of Milwaukee), Warren Zevon's show in Green bay where a storm prevented his equipment from getting there. He performed solo, got heckled, said "hey why don't YOU get up here and perform"

Sent by Lester Fiegel | 9:48 AM ET | 09-16-2008

You want solid evidence of fan-dom, swing by the casa for a visit. You'll go through the hall filled with autographed pictures of Tift Merritt and my husband, then into the office with an entire corner filled with Tift tickets, autographed CD covers, set lists galore, an autographed bottle of Makers-Mark (empty, of course), half of our storage hard-drive space filled with her albums, photos from the many shows we've attended, plus many we haven't, and every bootleg video and audio that exists, including ones we took. He co-manages her official fansite, leads her Street Team, runs the Mack-Daddy list and makes their T-shirts, mails out post cards, puts up posters for shows, and has wound up being a fairly integral part of their tour effort.

It's Tift 24/7 around these parts, and he definitely wears his fan status on his sleeve. Our poor friends.

Sent by Andie Reid | 12:28 PM ET | 09-16-2008

damn, carrie, I think it's just the weekend I've had but this totally made me cry. growing up is so bittersweet.

don't forget tattoos! and freaking myspace headlines.

Sent by jessamyn | 3:21 PM ET | 09-16-2008

i keep my ticket stubs. i have less and less t-shirts because as they become unwearable i let them go and they are not replaced. i rarely go to shows anymore due to my location (schenectady, ny) and my recent physical disability (can't stand at shows anymore - but am not yet in a wheelchair). it's not tragic - i've gone to hundreds of shows in my life - if not a thousand at this point. i saw tons and tons of shows when i lived in new york and seattle.

i will admit there is still a thrill in seeing someone wearing the shirt of a band i love - it makes me feel like a member of a secret society - even if the band is huge (like, say, nirvana).

i guess i show my love by buying their music and talking/blogging about what i'm listening to and encouraging others to support the bands i love. i have a bad habit of telling my friends in other cities (specifically seattle and new york) about shows i wish i could go to - hoping they will go to them.

i listen to music everyday and my love of certain bands is always renewed. we just moved and while unpacking today i watched "the year punk broke" which i haven't watched in years and i love it and practically know it word for word and song for song. it made me smile and reminded me of my deep love for sonic youth. the only tattoo i have is "sonic life" (graphic from SY's EVOL). i also unpacked and organized my CDs and listened to "call the doctor" and "dig me out."

Sent by xina | 6:45 PM ET | 09-16-2008

Plain clothes punk rocker. I think I may have given up wearing tshirts all together. Dunno. It's like when I get a haircut now I mean I work right but don't want to give up my RocknRoll livestyle know what I'm say'n. I mean I saw GBH but I don't want to be looking all Pearl Jam either. I am me now. A mash up? What ever the kids call it these days. not even ironic.

Sent by frankie | 6:51 PM ET | 09-16-2008

I have all of my ticket stubs going back to a Kinks show in 1983, when I was 16. Plus a whole bunch of stubs from other events (sports, theater, etc.).

But somewhere along the line, I lost a great t-shirt collection, amassed between 1980 and 1995ish. Somewhere between 3 moves in 3 years with a divorce mixed in, those shirts are long-gone.

I still want that Springsteen 1980 River Tour shirt my brother got me for my birthday.

Sent by Mr. Saucy | 12:13 AM ET | 09-17-2008

One year for my birthday, two of my friends stole a street sign with my Favorite Band's name on it. That was six years ago and i still have it hanging in my apartment. But don't get the wrong idea. There is a trashy way of decorating with such things and there is an aesthetic way of doing so. Needless to say, it's rock and roll.

Sent by wendy | 12:36 AM ET | 09-17-2008

I have a cigar box full of ticket stubs from every show I have ever been to. It is my biggest concert souvenir of all.

Now that I am older shows are limited where when I was younger I would try to hit a show a night.

Just opening that cigar box and seeing all of ticket stubs makes me thankful I have been a music fan all of my life.

Sent by Brian | 8:44 AM ET | 09-17-2008

I still have band posters up in the basement, wear band t-shirts, have a couple of stickers on my car, have a rock radio show at the local college station, and I am 32.

It's just what makes me happy in this life, I don't feel like I'm proving anything. I need it.

Sent by dadauptown | 9:00 AM ET | 09-17-2008

Interesting question. When I was younger it was definitely ticket stubs and t-shirts...I still fetishize t-shirts, but don't own as many since I don't go to as many concerts.

Now it's probably last.fm, since that's (just IMHO) one of the better ways of socially sharing likes and dislikes with people around the net and around the world.

One thing I've found with years of listening, though, is that my fandom is more conditional -- I refrain from declaring absolute love for any artist or band, because I feel they are one misstep away from a bomb of an album or a career slump. Yes, there are bands like S-K that escaped this trap, but I somehow lost that trust in the ability of bands to deliver continued pleasure for years on end with release after release. I've become more promiscuous, sadly, in my old age.

But I'll still wear the t-shirt as long as a band hasn't done anything really egregious.

Sent by Max | 10:26 AM ET | 09-17-2008

Wanna know something sad. I ran into someone wearing a Joy Division tee at some local event and I started talking to them about JD but they just looked at me as if I was crazy. I realized that they really knew nothing about Joy Divsion, but instead found a really awesome shirt at Target that happened to say Joy Division on it. Just sad.

Sent by CBlair | 10:54 AM ET | 09-17-2008

i have every stub for every show..the only time i printed out a ticket and didnt have an actual "ticket" was Elliott Smith..and it kills me to this day that all i have is a folded printed out email page to commemorate that show.

Sent by Richard | 7:00 PM ET | 09-17-2008

New Kids on the Block? I peg you as a Joe McIntyre fan. You may or may not have had a hat with the top cut out.

Sent by nmb | 11:18 AM ET | 09-19-2008

Great post, Carrie, as always. What you wrote struck a chord with me, for sure -- I still have all my old concert ticket stubs but only a few faded t-shirts, and all my posters are rolled up in tubes in the attic. I even recently wrote about this topic in a similar vein on my own blog, http://scribbleskiff.wordpress.com/2008/09/09/a-letter-and-a-mixtape-of-sorts-for-you/. I guess these days I prove my love for favorite bands (and nurse my bruised nostalgic funnybone) by turning my kids onto them, in the way I used to with my friends. Now it's my 13-, 10-, and 6-year-olds who ask me to play a song by Led Zeppelin or REM or Arcade Fire and who want to borrow my "cool King Crimson" button to wear to school. Now that's a sweet-sounding, warbly cassette if I've ever heard one. Keep these great columns coming.

Sent by Henry Mortimer | 2:45 PM ET | 09-19-2008

Shouldn't this post also be tagged with "luddite"?

Sent by Jaime | 9:06 PM ET | 09-20-2008

bookmarking their blogs...

Sent by guadalupe | 6:02 PM ET | 09-22-2008

Great post, and I have a solution to some the issues presented here.

1. Put your ticket stubs in your LP sleeve or behind the chassis of your jewel cases, make sure you can see them through the plastic. Just think, there's an album in your collection that you have not listened to in years, and you pull it out and remember the show simultaneously.

2. I'm 31, and saved every band shirt ever bought. There is no way I will ever wear most of them (its the age thing). Later this year we are pulling all of them out of the huge box that I have them stored in and making a blanket out of them. OK, maybe 2 blankets, great way of preserving your youth, music collection, memories, and of course, you're recycling.

Cheers,

Sent by Nick | 12:13 PM ET | 09-24-2008

I tattooed the cover of _I See a Darkness_ on my arm, and in the skull's empty eye sockets are roses, a reference to the song "Holland, 1945." Reckon I love Will Oldham and Jeff Mangum. People ask, and I tell them, vaguely, what the mark means to me because I could never _really_ tell them what it means to me.

Sent by brian | 7:18 PM ET | 10-02-2008