Free Comic Books: Say it Soft and it's Almost Like Praying

by Glen Weldon

This Saturday, May 2nd, you can walk into just about any comic shop in the country and get handed a bunch of free comic books.

Now me, I've had dreams like that.

But Free Comic Book Day is not intended for those of my ilk, who've already given ourselves over to the medium.

No, FCBD is the annual rite by which the nation's comics retailers band together to harvest fresh new souls -- people like you, who do not, as a matter of course, set foot inside comic shops.

Understand that you won't be able to just start pawing over the shelves. No, there'll be a passel of books provided by comics publishers, set aside specifically for FCBD giveaways. Some shops will allow you to pick and choose among them; others will simply hand you a pre-selected packet. You can use the FCBD site to locate a participating store near you.

And it will cost you nothing, nada, bupkis, zilch.

You may recognize this as the "your first taste is free" business model, so successfully embraced by the Columbia Record and Tape Club. Also, crack dealers.

Which: yeah, pretty much.

After the jump: A sneak peek at this year's FCBD selections, which do -- I repeat: DO -- include a healthy dose of Shatner.

We comics types are an insular bunch. We're chary of outsiders. We startle easily.

Which is why FCBD, inasmuch as it knocks us squarely out of our comfort zone, represents such a good, character building opportunity. It forces us as a people to step, blinking, into the full light of the wider world, and figure out ways to engage non-comics types in conversation.

As for the books themselves: Even though we've established that there's a hell of a lot more to comics than garishly costumed mesomorphs grimacing at one other over the smoking rubble of public works projects, superheroes remain the medium's dominant genre.

So yeah: Many of this year's FCBD books are superhero books. In fact, several are books about superheroes that seek to deconstruct long-established superhero tropes.

Which, if you're not much interested in the superhero genre, is a lot like reading a book about plumbing that cleverly skewers the use of galvanized hex wrenches to remove radiator steam traps. I get that.

But there'll be plenty of sci-fi books for the taking, and fantasy books and horror titles, along with a smattering of what the FCBD site calls "Slice of Life" books, not to mention several books for kids.

If you get a chance to pick and choose, here's some that will likely be worth picking and choosing. (Note: Your local shop's roster of free books may differ. They may not have ordered some of the titles listed below, and several stores use FCBD to unload some of the books they've gotten stuck with over the course of the past year.)

Best Bets:
Love and Rockets Sampler:
Sneak peek of upcoming chapters in Gilbert and Jaime Hernendez' beloved series. Don't let the superhero outfits and gazongas-the-size-of-medicine-balls on the cover fool you; Los Bros. Hernandez are always worth picking up.

Owly and Friends:
Adorkable fun for all ages. Dependably so.

Archie and the Mighty Archie Art Players:
Yeah, the title's a riff on an old Johnny Carson routine, which is pretty much a giveaway, right there. But then, you don't look to Archie for his of-the-moment pop-culture cachet, now do you? No, you look to him for gags, and plenty of 'em. Big deal, he's not timely -- he doesn't have to be. He's timeless, he's a survivor, and respect. Must. Be. Paid.

William Shatner Presents #1:
I'm in. I will likely regret it, but good God man: It's the Shat, and he's Presenting something.

Wolverine: Origin of an X-Man:
I'm not the biggest Wolverine fan (I prefer heroes who're slightly less given to the disembowelment of others), but you gotta hand it to Marvel for grasping the concept that this weekend's Hugh Jackman movie may send some folk into the comics shops.

Bongo Comics Free-for-All:
Comics featuring The Simpsons and Futurama. It's as if someone drew a Venn diagram of Things That Are Awesome, and it was nothin' but overlap.

You Get What You Pay For:
It is a truth universally acknowledged that comics tied to licensed properties tend toward the stinky. So prepare yourself accordingly. Should any of these turn out to be decent: Bonus.

Star Wars: The Clone Wars

Disney/Pixar's Cars

Transformers/G.I. Joe

Aliens/Predator

NASCAR Heroes

Sonic the Hedgehog: Evolution of a Hero

Warhammer Online: Prelude to War

Potluck:

Some savvy publishers approach FCBD by putting out sampler/anthology books, and this shotgun approach makes a lot of sense. Odds are good you'll find something to like in one or more of the following:

APE Cartoonapalooza

Arcana Studios Presents

Comics Festival!

DC Kids Mega Sampler

Studio 407 Sampler

Worlds of Aspen

As mentioned above, this year's batch of FCBD books seems a little light in crime, espionage and "slice of life"/indie comics -- genres that might appeal more directly to non-comics readers than sci-fi/fantasy/horror -- and that seems like a missed opportunity.

So if you make it into a store on Saturday, and that free zombie comic leaves you nonplussed, ask to flip through one of the following trade collections, and think about plunking down some dough -- which, after all, is what FCBD is really trying to get you to do, anyway:

Scalped: Hard-boiled crime fiction set on a Native American reservation

100 Bullets: Crime, sex, dark conspiracies.

Queen and Country: Realistic tales of espionage involving agent Tara Chace of the British secret service.

Local: Young woman moves from city to city, reinventing herself.

Love and Rockets: Los Bros. Hernandez aformentioned densely woven magnum opus of punk rock, crazy women, and a dose of magic realism.

Phonogram: In which pop music is literally magical.

Fables: Fairy tale characters live in exile in Manhattan.

Strangers in Paradise: Part romance, part deeply weird spy thriller, all awesome.