The 'Survivor' Injury Report: All Fun And Games Until Someone Loses An Eye

"Injuries threaten to send two castaways home." That's the episode description for last week's season premiere of Survivor as it is listed on my DVR. Not "The reality competition's 20th season begins" or "Previous seasons' 'heroes' and 'villains' duke it out on opposing tribes" or even "Extreme summer camp and corporate-retreat games combine for million-dollar prize." Just a straightforward dangling of the prospect of people getting hurt as enticement to watch the show.

It's an unfortunate trend on Survivor and one that only seems to be getting worse every season. Somewhere along the way, injuring yourself on the show stopped being a sign that you were stupid or clumsy or just plain doing something wrong and turned into a badge of honor.

And as with most things that make me cringe whenever I watch Survivor, I blame show host Jeff Probst.

But first, let's take a look at the incidents in question.

Ow, ow, ow, ow, after the jump.

 

The first injury took place 17 minutes into the season, during the very first round of the very first challenge. In what was basically a variation of Capture The Sandbag Because A Flag Would Be Too Easy, 'Hero' Stephenie LaGrossa's shoulder was dislocated while grappling with her competitors. The challenge required participants to work in pairs to obtain and then get control of the sandbag and return across the finish line with it, meaning that it sometimes encouraged two people to use just about any means necessary to tackle and then take a sandbag away from someone else. No pads, no gear, very few apparent guidelines for safe contact — which isn't even the case with highly trained wrestlers and football players. It is a great way to injure people, and people were injured.

In addition to providing a fascinating lesson in human anatomy — what seemed to be LaGrossa's agonizing pain vanished instantly once the show's medical crew snapped her shoulder back into place with an audible pop that nearly made me lose my lunch — it also laid out the show's priorities unmistakably. Probst announced "We have our first injury" with a visible grin, and the game continued on with enough physicality for Rupert Boneham to break his toe before it was over.

True, Probst called out "Play fair down there!" when, at another point during the challenge, Russell Hantz (representing the "villains") pried himself from Tom Westman's grip by pushing down hard on Westman's neck, then put Westman on the ground, grabbed his leg, and twisted it at the knee to immobilize him as Westman shouted in pain. But the challenge ended with the host gleefully giving a tally of the injuries suffered before the players even set foot on their home beaches.

Survivor contestants have been hurting themselves ever since the second season, when Mike Skupin fell into a fire and had to be taken out of the game to receive immediate medical attention. But there's a big difference between then and now: that was an accident. LaGrossa's and Boneham's injuries both happened on the show's watch, as a result of a show-mandated activity. The same thing happened on Survivor: Fans Vs. Favorites when Jonathan Penner punctured his leg with a stick during a challenge on a course the show built, resulting in an infection so severe that the medical crew had to evacuate him or risk him losing his leg entirely.

More distressing, though, is the show's increasingly cavalier attitude towards such things, especially so soon after last season, when Russell Swan blacked out in the middle of a challenge (the result of overworking himself back at camp without regard to hunger, dehydration or fatigue). Probst admitted that it was the scariest thing he'd ever witnessed in all his time on the show, but he eventually saluted Swan's never-say-die gumption.

And that's exactly the problem. These contestants who are being encouraged to never say die? They could die. And whatever attention it might attract in the short term, the last thing Survivor wants in the long term is a death or even a permanent injury on its record. But still Probst greets bruises, scrapes or worse with some variation of "Glad that everybody's fighting hard for this one!" or "Good to see that everybody brought their A game!" It's an attitude that views Survivor as a noble, almost spiritual endeavor requiring actual physical sacrifice, rather than what it actually is: an incredibly stupid reason to hurt yourself, million dollars or no.

You know the people who object to reality television on principle? This is the principle to which many of them object, precisely this creepy and voyeuristic disregard for the safety of participants. We're being asked to watch people actually injure themselves for the chance at a million dollars, with nary a word of discouragement on behalf of the show.

Oh, and in case you missed them, the previews for this week's episode consisted of a series of scenes that show noted "villain" Rob Mariano passing out in the forest and being unresponsive when the medical crew shines a flashlight in his eyes. Happy viewing!