by Linda Holmes
You might know that Dancing With The Stars kicked off its tenth season last night, and that the lowest scores of the evening went to Buzz Aldrin. The astronaut is, in fairness, 80 years old, but as seen above, he unfortunately shows every day of those 80 years. This is not his fault, and he seems to be a lovely man, and I'd be lying if I denied that I love the story where he punched the moon-landing skeptic in the face. (I know, I know.)
Nevertheless, this is sort of a "drawing the short straw" situation for his partner, professional dancer Ashly Costa. And drawing the really short straw this season wouldn't seem quite so noteworthy if not for the fact that this is Ashly's first return on the show since she danced with Harry Hamlin (she was then known as Ashly DelGrosso) way back in the third season. Now, Harry Hamlin also seemed like a nice enough man, but you could not have created a more wooden dancer if you had carved him out of old-growth timber. He's trying, and he's certainly better than Buzz, but can you not almost hear him counting in his head?
Let's go to the video, after the jump.
Most notably, however, Ashly once drew the shortest straw in the show's entire history when she wound up, in the second season, partnered with Master P, the single most apathetic participant ever to dance. Seriously -- the man would not wear dancing shoes. Ashly did her best to just dance around him, flashing her teeth and hoping for the best. Look how painful.
Should one woman really have drawn both Buzz Aldrin and Master P when she's only done the show four times? Is she being punished?
Granted, Ashly had a great partner in the show's very first, very short season -- she was with Joey McIntyre, the former New Kid On The Block, and he was a fine dancer. But that makes her one for four. One for four!
The short straw does get passed around, to some degree -- even the suspiciously lucky Cheryl Burke was Tom DeLay's partner last season until he dropped out with broken feet -- but Ashly has now had to carry partners single-handedly on 50 percent of the occasions she has done the show. That is one put-upon lady in sparkles.