Leroy, so glad you came to a good decision, and with your doctors' support. I was overwhelmingly struck by this: "If, or rather when, tumors do reappear, I'm no worse off if I start the new chemo then instead of now." That just says it all for me, and apparently for you. Very happy for you that you came to a decision you can rest on.

Sent by Teri | 1:27 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Congrats on the reprieve!

Sent by Katie | 1:29 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Dear Leroy,

After reading this latest post, even I feel as though a huge weight has been lifted off my chest! I'm happy that you're in a good place even though you don't know how long youll be allowed to stay. Enjoy it. And who knows, maybe it will last forever. Maybe you passed this inhumane test. Maybe you won.

Sent by Marylee | 1:33 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Hi Leroy,

While some of us may not agree with this decision, there isn't one of us out here who can make that quality of life determination for you. Take heart in knowing that whatever road you take, now or in the future, you will never be alone on that path. One nice thing about our cancer subculture is the unconditional caring and support of each other no matter what comes our way.

Live each day to the fullest. You've earned it.

Sent by Kathy B. | 2:38 PM ET | 02-01-2007

I'm really glad that you could talk this over with your doctors. They seem so accessible and that's great. Your decision makes sense keep on keeping on.

Sent by Cindy H. | 2:55 PM ET | 02-01-2007

REPRIEVE!!! Enjoy it. Best of luck.

Sent by Samantha | 3:03 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Hot diggity! Do I sense a trip to Hawaii in the offing now that you've got reliable "Feel Good" time ahead?

Sent by Sarah | 3:07 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Your life, your call... that's how I see it.

Oh, yeah, and your friends (that's a whole bunch of us!) who support you, without blinking, and who will never, ever play the "if only" game with you.

Rock on, Leroy!

Sent by JJ | 3:10 PM ET | 02-01-2007

This is the first time I am writing but I must tell you I AM WITH YOUR DECISION!!! I would probably have made the same choice. Quality of Life is equally important as quantity to me!! Rest and enjoy!! I read you & think of you everyday! I send blessings.

Sent by Betty | 3:11 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Leroy:

It is wonderful to hear of your decision not to do more chemo right now. After 18 months of my own chemo whereupon I tried three different mixtures, none proved effective. Finally, I decided there was no point to taking toxic potions if it only made me feel bad and was no longer effective.

It was not an easy decision but your courage helped me address the matter.

God Bless you and good luck.

Sent by Christopher Barry | 3:12 PM ET | 02-01-2007

I am so glad you were able to come to a good decision — which is the one that is right for you. I also have a wonderful oncologist at Hopkins and it makes a world of difference in your perceptions of control of the disease. Congratulations and enjoy.

Sent by Laura Lieberman | 3:43 PM ET | 02-01-2007

To say that I am surprised would be a lie, I knew you had chosen to not pursue chemo at this time. I can't really say anything as I stopped maintenance chemo after about 6 months. 14 months of straight chemo was more then I could endure, but my tumors are in remission.

Hopefully you can use this time to build your strength back, both mentally and physically and get ready for the next push.

Maybe give this round of chemo another look in a month or so, perhaps then it will be the right time.

Sent by Brit | 3:45 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Leroy,

You investigated this, you asked all of the questions, you thought it through thoroughly, so you made the right decision. I hope no one tries to make you second guess your decision. I'm sure that no former or current cancer patients will, we understand what a difficult decision process this is.

What I am most happy about is your last statement - that you will sleep easy tonight. That says it all! The most important aspect of having quality of life is peace!

I'm proud of you for continuing to persevere, to be vulnerable to all of us strangers, for trying experimental treatments, for being so open to the wisdom of others!

So now, we anxiously await to hear what you will do after you finish RFA and radiation and your quality of life improves!

Sent by Kelley | 3:47 PM ET | 02-01-2007

I think that all that matters, Leroy, is that YOU are comfortable with the decision. I'm sure it's not an easy one to make (either way), but like you said recently, make a decision and don't look back and worry about the "what ifs." Focus your energy on kicking cancer's butt! I'm sending good thoughts your way!

Sent by A.T. | 3:49 PM ET | 02-01-2007

I think being able to sleep is one of the best possible worlds. I wish you much peace and happiness on the next stage of your journey.

In the next three weeks, testing will help determine what the next stage of my treatment will be after 13 rounds of chemo and two surgeries. In the meantime, I will be able to travel and get a massage for the first time in six months. Hip hip hooray.

Please know that reading your writings has made it much easier for me to find peace during the day-to-day uncertainty. I hope your musings are being collected for a book. Many more people would have the advantage of hearing your perspective.

Hang loose.

Sent by Cathy Bybel | 4:41 PM ET | 02-01-2007

I lost my dad to cancer and I miss him but did support his decisions and his choices. I think you are faced with such enormous decisions but your My Cancer has brought my family together in that we discuss and share in your pain and the thought that goes through your decisions my dad did not share and that made it very hard on us. Thanks so much and in my prayers

Sent by Kathy | 4:57 PM ET | 02-01-2007

You're a pretty smart guy, Leroy.

The decision your doctors made is an option that was high on your list of "what to do". Even if this decision was a surprise, the weight of indecision has to be greater and I'm happy that it has been lifted for now.

Enjoy your time off.

Sent by jeri magid | 4:59 PM ET | 02-01-2007

My dear Leroy:

As always, I have tremendous respect for you and your decision-making processes. I'm sure all of us look forward to reading about the good times you will now be able to enjoy, feeling good and being free of having to make any more decisions for a while.

Sent by Harriet H. Liss | 5:23 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Oh Leroy, I'm so very happy to read of the careful and thorough help that you've had in making your decision, and that you get a longer reprieve from chemotherapy. It's a great way to start my day. My oncologist didn't order chemotherapy for me for the same reason ... quality of life. Since chemotherapy would provide no survival advantage in my case, and as we all know, would have a negative effect on the ol QOL, I've been on anti-hormonal therapy alone since all of my surgeries, and I'm in remission as a result. Sometimes we get a break ... and it's wonderful.

I went to my first meeting of a new support group for cancer patients last night. A radiation oncologist who'd had sarcoma in his early twenties spoke. The group's mission is to help us to move past the cancer experience to live a fuller life. I told the group about you and your blog, and recommended it for the dialogue that it provides. Maybe you'll be hearing from some of them.

By the by ... did you have a great steak sandwich when you were at Hopkins?

Sent by Nancy K.Clark | 5:44 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Leroy,

I'm so glad you were able to have that time with your doctors. It's critical to be able to think out loud at times like this. All any of us can do is to make the best choice we can at any given point (I've been in your shoes, to a certain degree). I've often wondered what I'd do if I faced similar decisions and I'd like to think that quality of life would win out.

So hang in there. We will continue to stand beside and behind you!

Sent by betsey Kuzia | 5:53 PM ET | 02-01-2007

be at peace. the decision is made and oh so glorious to look ahead for at least a couple of months of freedom! to be the "normal" Leroy.

And by the way, I had 6 months of Irintican and Erbitux and it was not fun but it was not as bad as you make it sound! The rash was tolerable but you know, we all are different.

May you have a skip in your step today!

Sent by Allison | 5:56 PM ET | 02-01-2007

I have never written to you before, but I've been reading your blog for the past few months. I have seen how agonizing this decision about chemo has been for you. I just want to say how happy I am that you have reached a decision that works for you. You listened to the other writers on this blog, you had discussions with your doctors, and then you made the decision that was right for you. That takes a lot of courage, because it's much easier just to give that responsibility over to someone else. I have been praying for you and will continue to do so. May those other tumors in your lungs be blown away by the new procedure and afterwards may you be tumor-free for a long time!

Sent by Tina | 5:59 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Be well. Rest as easy as you can. Enjoy.

Best Regards,Sandra Yudilevich

Sent by Sandra Yudilevich | 6:00 PM ET | 02-01-2007

It doesn't matter remotely what I think, but I'm going to tell you anyway {g}—I think you made a great choice!

Are you considering going to Hawaii now because you can? (Go! Go! Go! Enjoy!)

Sent by Betty Thomas | 6:02 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Dear Leroy,

Great news that the best course of action for you right now is to let your body continuing healing without taking further treatments. When I'm in that situation, people tell me it must be awful to have to "Wait and see" (as if I was waiting for the other shoe to drop). I tell them that they are mistaken: I'm going to "LIVE and see" (not "wait and see"). I hope you continue to heal and never need chemo again. with hope, Wendy

Sent by Wendy S. Harpham, MD | 6:16 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Leroy, as long as you're listening to your doctors, everybody is going to support you and back you up. You do what you think is right for you, which is just what it seems like you're doing. Good luck, and all fingers and toes crossed!

Sent by Linda | 6:20 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Dear Mr. Sievers,

I was one of the readers who pushed for chemo.

But, I forgot to take something very, very important into consideration:

quality of life

How could I have missed that? Jeez.

You know what's great about what you've written today, and what absolutely shines through — you don't sound anxious in the least. So, mentally and spiritually — you're on top of this. That must feel very good.

So, yes, sleep well tonight. And then — have a great weekend! I'm one of the many who will be looking forward to hearing about it.

Sent by Janice J. | 6:22 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Dear Mr. Sievers:

I am glad that you chose the route that you did. I am glad that you will be able to sleep tonight. I am a 67 year old "lite" cancer person. Three & a half years ago, I had a lumpectomy and radiation, with adjuvant pill popping for 5 years. No chemo. It was "lite", as I said, and nothing like what you have experienced at your young age, although as we all know, this stuff comes back.

You needed to kill that cruel cancer and you have worked very hard to kill it. Now you deserve to sleep restfully, eat chocolate, drink good wine and have everyday, good old quality of life. I wish for you to look ahead to many good days, weeks, months and sure - why not, years. I wish you all the best.

Sent by Patricia | 6:26 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Hey Leroy — I'm excited for you! You deserve some "normal" days. It will be fun to see how you use this time, which should feel like a vacation.

Sent by Linda Hilsen | 8:09 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Sounds like good news to me! Hooray!

Enjoy each day as I'm sure you will!!

Sent by Madeline | 8:14 PM ET | 02-01-2007

Viva le Leroy!

Sent by Chris | 3:17 PM ET | 02-02-2007

I envy you your Doctors time they spend with you. I always seem so rushed through. I am not a demanding person so I tend to think my questions are inane or obvious to anyone but me. Monday when I go in for my next treatment I am going to ask them why my fingernails are falling off, all the skin off the souls of my feet and why my blood count is so low they gave me a transfusion last week. Simple enough! I am glad you have this reprieve don't worry about what you should have done...they pointed out the best direction at the fork in the road. Like Marylee said, maybe it will last forever. I hope with all my heart. God Bless!!!!

Sent by Patti | 3:19 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Hi Leroy,

I'm so glad for your rest tonight, and your courageous decision. I'm currently taking high-dose vitamin C (along with Herceptin, Zomata, Lupron and Femara) with little or no side-effects. I would like to encourage you to add naturopathy to your regime as you get on with your quality of life. For me, being proactive in such a positive way brings peace of mind in the wait for this disease to rear its ugly head.

Enjoy your chemo-free life!

Sent by Terri | 3:21 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Dear Leroy: CONGRATULATIONS on your decision. What a load off of you. I agree quality not quantity. Enjoy Enjoy Enjoy. And thank you from the bottom of my heart for all of your sharing. You'll never know how closely you've touched my heart.

Sent by Tanya | 3:22 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Leroy — God bless you for following your heart. We all have our paths to walk and you have chosen your fork in the road.

Sent by Robin | 4:13 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Dear Leroy,

Wishing you "enough" while you are enjoying your vacation — sweetness, blue skies, peaceful mornings with a calm stomach, lunches with friends, music, books, films, family and lots of love. Sleep easy.

Sent by Shawna Ramsey | 4:47 PM ET | 02-02-2007

I love doctors who are willing to wait and see rather than racing for the next thing. It's so wonderful that they took the time to talk it through with you — definitely the way it should be done. I have a great doc like that too. Use your "break" to do sometime fantastic. I agree with your doctor that you should go to Hawaii now and enjoy it rather than waiting until there is no hope. I went to Hawaii in early January knowing that I was coming back to a biopsy. No big surprise, I'm having a reoccurrence. But this time in the dreaded chemo chair Ill have memories of an amazing trip to keep me afloat. I'll imagine myself floating in the pool watching a beautiful sunset at the wonderful inn where we stayed. (Let me know if you want the name of the inn.)Have a GREAT rest tonight.

Sent by Martha | 4:48 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Leroy,

I know how tough it was to make your decision and I would never question your choice. I do want to tell that I just finished my 6th treatment of Irenotican and Erbitux and I haven't had any side effects. In fact, I feel better than I have in 2 years. The rash is on my back and I didn't lose my hair. I know everyone responds in a different way but I thought this information might help when you do start the chemo. I hope and pray that it will be as easy on you and it has been for me. I was afraid it wasn't working but it did shrink my tumors enough that I am now being considered for ablation. I admire your courage and wish you the best.

Sent by Debbie | 4:53 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Leroy,

DO sleep very well tonight and all nights. Get your strength back — I never knew how bad I felt until the chemo stopped. I'm still beating it — three years next month was the end of my treatment - or the beginning of a new way to live — I think of you and us all everyday.

Sent by Patty | 4:54 PM ET | 02-02-2007

I am so happy for you!

Enjoy your vacation from treatment and rest up. Most of all, keep walking the road... don't look back and second guess. If it feels right, it is right.

Hugs...

Sent by Deb C | 4:56 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Good for you Leroy! I face the same decision myself next Wednesday, regarding my extensive liver and bone metastasis. I'm leaning the same as you: quality of life is so important after three years of weekly chemo. I'm ready for that break.

Sent by Ursula | 5:05 PM ET | 02-02-2007

God bless you for your courage. I will keep you in my prayers, even though I don't know your name. My dear mother had breast cancer, had a mastectomy and lived many years after that. "Thy name is my healing, O my God." Your doctors sound wonderful to spend two hours with you consulting and encouraging you.

Sent by Heather | 5:07 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Way to go, Mr. Sievers. Quality of life decisions are never easy, are they? Like you, I love my doctor because his answers are always honest and not sugar-coated to pacify me. We would have parted company long ago, if that were the case.

Now I have a question for you. What is it like to be off chemo? I've never had that luxury since I started on it back in late October. Because I couldn't tolerate the concentrated 3-week dosage, I was put on lower levels and must go in once a week for chemo. How long after stopping chemo do you get your previous energy levels back, when does your hair start to regrow, when can you walk across your living room floor without feeling exhausted? Well, that's three questions. Can you answer them for me in your blog? I know you don't respond directly. I will have to make this decision in five more weeks.

Thank you so much.

Sent by Brenda Lynch | 5:38 PM ET | 02-02-2007

You are my hero!

Sent by Marianne Dalton | 5:40 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Leroy,

Good for you for making your decision. I, too, was thinking that you should go with the chemo. But how do I, or anyone else, really know about what you should do. When my mother was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want any treatment, we gave her the guilt treatment — well... do it for the family. She didn't want to die — she fought the cancer and for life to the end. But I think she would have preferred to fight without the side effects of chemo. There is much to say about quality of life.

Now, if you want something for quality of life... try Iscador. My Mom convinced me and her doctors of its benefits.

Sent by Chrystyna | 5:42 PM ET | 02-02-2007

God bless you Leroy. You're one tough cookie.

Sent by Jessie | 5:43 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Mr. Sievers, once again you have shown each and every one of us how to live with the ups and downs of this treacherous and uncertain disease... with grace, with compassion, with confidence that each decision must be taken in measured stride. You have been deluged by a tsunami of advice, and I applaud you for making the decision that you believe is best for you. I read your postings every morning as a touchstone for dealing with my own cancer. Sleep well tonight and every night and know you have my eternal gratitude for choosing to share your journey with us.

Sent by Peggy | 5:43 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Leroy:

We will all be praying for you. You have made you choice and no looking back. It is wonderful that you will be able to feel GOOD now and perhaps the cancer will just go away. As you know Prayers ARE answered! You are not alone!

Sent by Joan | 5:44 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Bravo for a brave decision and for sharing it with your readers. Your choice for quality of life is something I wish more would consider as an option. Do I hear the waves hitting the beaches in Hawaii?

Sent by Leslie | 5:45 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Leroy,

It sounds like a sound and wise decision. After all... if you don't have a tolerable quality of life, then why are we living?

Enjoy!

Sent by Mary Sebastiani | 5:45 PM ET | 02-02-2007

I'm glad you seem to be at peace with your decision and I'm all for trusting the doctors. I find they are generally the smartest guys in the room. Enjoy this time.

Sent by Marcia | 5:48 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Enjoy the respite, take care of the lung tumors and then deal with what happens. Just don't look back or have any regrets, its not worth the time or energy. You have the facts and you know yourself. Your decision is made.

Are you going to Hawaii this spring?

Sent by Chris | 5:49 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Leroy,

Good for you. You made the best choice for yourself and I know it was the right one for now or you wouldn't be comfortable with it. I think there really is a kind of peace that comes when we've thought things through and made our choices. Sleep well tonight!

Sent by Diana Kitch | 5:50 PM ET | 02-02-2007

And these days of feeling good will be the best in your life — because you'll have energy and hope.

Sent by Kathleen | 5:52 PM ET | 02-02-2007

The fact that your doctors spent two hours with you going over your options speaks volumes about the level of care you are receiving. That is amazing and I can understand why you love them! Good for you for remaining open to all your options until you actually had to make that final decision. I'm glad that tough decision is behind you. Enjoy your chemo-free life!

Sent by Laurie | 6:04 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Leroy,

You deserve a break. My prayers are with you that you never need chemo again. Enjoy your life. Thanks for all you have given all of us, your many readers.

Sent by Michael | 6:08 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Congratulations on making your decision. It sounds like you are fully confident that you made the right choice for you. That's the most important thing in this uncertain and unpredictable process.

Sent by Leslie | 6:09 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Good choice, Leroy! I've just completed 6 weeks of radiation after going through an 18-week cycle of 6 chemo treatments for uterine cancer. I've been reading your column for about 6 months and have felt very close to you as you repeatedly answer or speak to the same doubts and issues and fears of living with cancer that so many of us are going through. Your decision not to begin a new and more difficult chemo regimen on the chance that it may kill those cancer cells possibly lurking out there was brave and, I think, the correct decision to make. You've already gone through treatments that, in the end, killed some tumors but turned out to be ineffective in stopping new ones from growing. Enjoy your choice of quality of life over "just in case" hell. Deal with whatever may arise in the future when it happens. For now, I'm joining the legions of fellow travelers who wish you well and who will continue to find your column an inspiration.

Sent by Amy Trimarco | 6:11 PM ET | 02-02-2007

You did the right thing.

You listened to your doctors.

And when are you gonna come out here to Hawaii? I'll meet you at the plane with a lei and a mai tai. Surf was at 40 feet yesterday, so when we rent a board for you for your surfing lesson, well have a couple more mai tais.

Sent by David Larsen | 6:13 PM ET | 02-02-2007

Leroy, You are very fortunate to have doctors that you really trust and feel comfortable with. I think you made the best decision, it makes very good sense. Forget what I said, I was just being cautious, but only you can know for sure what to do for yourself and you did good. What a wonderful feeling to know you can relax for a while and feel normal. I'm so happy for you.

Sent by Ruth White | 6:17 PM ET | 02-02-2007

You did good! If you feel right about something, then it is right! There is nothing better than a good nights sleep. I'm proud of you and your doctors.

Sent by Betty | 6:22 PM ET | 02-02-2007

I'm so relieved to see your decision . . .

I was hoping it would go this way, but I was reluctant to say anything beforehand!

Enjoy these months, and I'll continue hoping for the best and praying for you.

Thank you SO much for the wonderful, human way you are able to explain the emotions as well as the science.

Sent by Judith Newkirk | 6:25 PM ET | 02-02-2007

I'm glad your doctors helped you with this big decision. It's what I would've done if presented with the same options. Now enjoy your vacation from chemo—quality of life is so important!

Sent by Leslie | 12:28 PM ET | 02-05-2007

Congratulations! I remember how few opportunities there were with my Dad to be able to feel sure he'd made the right choice, and sleep as a rule didn't come easy anyway... Enjoy your break, and know that were all behind you in our thoughts and prayers...

Sent by Tammy | 12:34 PM ET | 02-05-2007

Hello Leroy. I'm on Irinotecan, 5-FU, Erbitux, and Avastin. It's ok. My appetite is gone but I don't have much active nausea. I have some acne but not much. It's been very tolerable. Your decision is the right one for you but if you decide to go with the chemo, it could be ok too. I had a tumor in each lung. After 6 treatments, they are GONE!

Sent by Jarrett | 1:53 PM ET | 02-07-2007

Leroy,

I have nothing particularly original to contribute: I, too, am happy for you, that YOU are happy with your decision.

I think quality of life is very important going through the chemo treatment, as you described it, certainly doesn't sound like it would give you much quality of life!

I am glad that you have been given a reprieve, at least for now. It doesn't sound like the uncertainties of the chemo treatment together with its side effects would naturally incline you to take it.

So, I'm happy for you, and I hope you enjoy not being on chemo!

Sent by Greg Sheryl | 1:58 PM ET | 02-07-2007

Sleep well tonight and every night! You chose what is best for you. Go out and party, chocolate and red wine!

Sent by Pat | 2:00 PM ET | 02-07-2007

Hi Leroy,

I wish you many years filled with lots of love, laughter, sunshine and peace.

Warm regards...

Sent by Marta | 2:01 PM ET | 02-07-2007

Leroy,

That must have been tough to finally come to the decision of foregoing chemo for now. I'm glad you are comfortable with the choice you made, and hopefully in March you will not have to endure chemo. Good luck!

Sent by Lisa V. | 2:02 PM ET | 02-07-2007

Rest well tonight Leroy. Dream happy dreams.

Sent by Patricia | 2:04 PM ET | 02-07-2007

Hey Leroy, that sounds like great news, it also sounds like your Drs are great too. That was one of the things that really impressed me when my late wife went through all of this, was the patient attitude from our Onc. He was really great in explaining and listening to our concerns without ever sounding bored or looking bored. However many times a Dr hears a specific question, to each patient it is a very important question and new to them. A good Dr will have good bedside manners so to speak. So glad you don't have to have the chemo right now... enjoy yourself.

Sent by Dan | 2:05 PM ET | 02-07-2007

If you're no worse off then than now, take the break! I am on my first break from chemo (cisplatin/docetaxel/avastin) since I was diagnosed back in august. I feel incredibly good. I still take an EFGR inhibitor so, like Erbitux, I am expecting the acne and the runs. But that, compared to the chemo I just went through is nothing.

You also should consider the time of year in relation to your chemo cycles. If you're gonna do it, might as well do it during winter, at least that's my attitude. Hopefully, I can make it to Fall without a round 2. Good luck Leroy.

Savor your food.

Sent by Aaron P. | 2:07 PM ET | 02-07-2007

YOU are an inspiration. I am going through some health issues now and really cannot stand the 24/7 nausea. My doctor said there is light at the end of the tunnel in a "few months." I highly doubt I could come to your conclusion with such resolve and strength. I am praying for you and for those dang tumors to rest for a few more, well 40 more years.

Sent by Danny | 2:08 PM ET | 02-07-2007

Dear Leroy,

I am so glad for you! I'm praying for you and hope things just keep getting better for you. Enjoy your chemo break.

Sent by Debbie | 3:09 PM ET | 02-07-2007

Dear Leroy,

I am confident that you'll be ok. Your treatment has kept you going for a long time. So, if you are going to be followed, do the chemo later.

I was surprised that Erbitux was going to be one of your new chemo treatments. Then I did recall that Erbitux has or is going for a first-line status. Erbitux besides crushing the fortunes of BMS, (from $70 per share to $18, during the Miss Steward trial) was previously known for giving stage 4 colon cancer victums an average of another 30 days of survival. Not a cure. However, Erbitux may have more effect on preventing single cancer cells from obtaining the blood network they need to bundle and create tumors. Cancer cells on their own are not so much a problem, it is when they mass that they can prevent all members of the tumor to be reached by the therapy.

I think it can be agreed that BMS wishes it never heard of Erbitux or the company that manufactures the drug.

Sent by Joseph P. Lyons | 9:36 AM ET | 02-09-2007

Leroy: I must admit sighing deeply with relief when I read your post this morning. For me, quality always trumps quantity. There is nothing passive about living intensely and using your mind and thoughts to harness the healing energy of this universe. Go knock them alive and live big!

Sent by Janet | 1:51 PM ET | 02-09-2007

Leroy, I applaud your courage and strength in making this difficult decision. Thank you for explaining your clear reasoning steps, as many of us readers will/have been faced with nearly identical choices.

If/when you need to go on the next chemo journey, I have a hat that I would be honored to send to you. This particular hat was my way to laugh in the face of cancer... and allow others who saw me to know that it's okay to do the same. This hat is actually a men's cotton bucket hat. In white stitching on medium green denim is the phrase "Bad Hair Day." I purchased it from The Dana Farber Cancer Centers "Friends Boutique", a loving place which has an array of cancer care products that range from serene to outrageous. Nearly every cancer patient who enters the small shop emerges with a smile and a look of hope.

To add to the discussion on hair loss, during my 6 months of chemo last year, I did not find it traumatic to lose all of my shoulder length thick hair. The large amount of information on the Internet prepared me for the timeline, etc. I felt that I needed to put my energy into recovery from advanced stage disease, and let the appearance chips fall where they might. I also discovered that I look great in short hair and that I do have a perfect head if I need to be bald again. I'm also of the opinion that wigs are somewhat overrated. While I own two, I found them mostly to be uncomfortable compared to my favorite scarves and hats for any length of time. One of my very best friends was undergoing chemo for a different cancer at the same time so I confess to having the luxury of a ready-made support group with whom I could share the daily chronicle of ups and downs and hairlessness. At some point I came to the realization that this trip were forced to be on is not about the hair at all, so I will gladly trade good health for less hair.

Thank you for letting me go on for today. Wishing for your steady good progress.

Sent by Sheara | 1:54 PM ET | 02-09-2007

I have been dealing with esophageal cancer for a year. No chemo has shown a long lasting effect. As a last resort I have been on Irinotecan and Erbetux for the last 4 weeks, with 3 more scheduled. I think they sound scarier than they are. Irinotecan does induce diarrhea, and that is certainly annoying, but following the directions and gulping down large quantities of Immodium has had a good effect. With fear, I await the Rash. None of the chemo I have had has caused hair loss, which I like, and nausea has been minimal. I follow Lance's advice and keep walking and working out, and I am sure that will help. The Drs think I have a few months remaining and I think I have a few years. Going to Sun Valley this wknd. So my workouts are geared toward that and my golf games this summer. No winter golf in Central Oregon.

Sent by Tim Andersen | 1:55 PM ET | 02-09-2007

Good for you Leroy for making the decision that YOU are comfortable with. Like you said, virtually all was leaning towards more chemo. You continue to show you personal strength and what a clear thinker you are. Thank you for how you can inspire. May you have many more nights that you can sleep easy.

Sent by Debbie R. | 1:56 PM ET | 02-09-2007

Leroy, sounds like through careful and informed consideration you made your best choice. I hope you and NED (no evidence of disease) meet soon!

Sent by Brooke | 2:05 PM ET | 02-09-2007

Leroy, Good for you for making the decision that felt right for you right now. That's the best that anyone can do, given all the uncertainties.

Don't feel like you let anyone down here. Of course, I want to see you live, to see you beat this, but only on your own terms.

Enjoy the break. Enjoy your life! Forget about cancer for a while.

Sent by Marilyn | 2:20 PM ET | 02-09-2007

You deserve to sleep well. When I went through chemo, the words Janis Joplin sang from "Me and Bobby McGee" always went through my mind: "Feelin' good was easy when Bobby sang the blues... and feelin' good was good enough for me." Ain't that the truth! Here's hoping and praying that you are "feelin' good" for a long time. God bless you, Leroy.

Sent by Bob Clements | 2:24 PM ET | 02-09-2007

Congratulations on making that difficult choice. Thanks again for sharing your story and your choices with all of us. Your grace, dignity, and thought process amazes me every single day.

P.S. Maybe now you and that beautiful soul of a wife you have can squeeze in a pleasure trip to Hawaii?

Sent by Nichole | 2:25 PM ET | 02-09-2007

Leroy,

You've made the right decision for you and that's all that matters. Well-meaning others can offer their two cents from afar but, really, only you know what's best for you. Your body has endured an unfathomable amount of pain and upset not only because of the cancer, but also because of the side effects of chemo and other treatments. Quality of life is paramount and you, my friend, are entitled to set the standard however you see fit.

I wish you many, many, many more good days, free of any thoughts of chemo and its inevitable complications. Continue to trust in the decision that you have made, and absolutely rest easy knowing that despite potential challenges from well-meaning others, you have, in fact, done the very best that you can do. I have no doubt that your incredible courage, strength, honesty, and humor, which have brought you thus far, will continue to light your path. Thanks for allowing so many of us to share your journey.

Sent by Rita | 2:27 PM ET | 02-09-2007

You know when the right decision has been made for you. I hope your sleep will be easy for many, many nights and that you don't have to go on chemo for a very long time. Your writing about this is so inspiring to all who read it. If there is strength in numbers then the number of people pulling and praying for you should certainly mean a long time of feeling better. Peace.

Sent by Sondra Scott | 2:29 PM ET | 02-09-2007

Leroy,

Not to minimize the word "heroic", but your decision was, from your personal standpoint. John Hopkins docs spending 2 hours with you, shows the level of care you are receiving. Quality of life is a great decision, and I commend your approach.

Sent by Laura | 2:30 PM ET | 02-09-2007

Good link! Check it out and all the best.

http://www.webmd.com/solutions/complementary-care/medical-model

Sent by V.P. | 2:31 PM ET | 02-09-2007

Dear Leroy,
I just finished my chemo with Irinotecan at Hopkins and my physician was also Dr. Ross Donehower. I was poorly managed by an oncologist in Washington D.C. and was very fortunate to become Dr Donehower's patient. He is very knowlegeable about options and management of the patient. I wish you the best.

Sent by Marita Mathias Hoerauf | 10:27 PM ET | 02-22-2008