I am remembering Christmases past, family that have passed, family still with us yet unable to be with us because of health. This year I am quite a bit more weepy then in the past and I am not sure why.

Christmas a time of joy and pain, reflection and plans, family and friends. I am waiting my "child" with wide eyed anticipation to get here. Merry Christmas to all! God keep us safe and close.

Sent by Sue Chap | 7:34 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Terrific message for today!! Healing and peace ....my hope and prayer for you and Laurie as well as all of the bloggers who are a part of our extended family.

Sent by Al Cato | 7:37 AM ET | 12-21-2007

To Leroy and all (and I quote a most hilarious season's greeting):

Best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially acceptable, low stress, non-adictive, gender neutral, winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most joyous traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, but with respect for the religious persuasions of others who choose to practice their own religion as well as those who choose not to practice a religion at all

Additionally,

a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and relatively medically uncomplicated recognition of the generally accepted calendar year 2008, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions have helped make our society great, without regard to the race, creed, color, relitious, or sexual preferences of the wishes.

(Discliamer: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for himself or others and has no responsibility for any unintended emotional stress these greetings may bring to those not caught up in the holiday spirit.)

Sent by Leonard | 7:46 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Oh Leroy I love your message and memory today. Sounds like the Principal was trying to instill in the students the belief that Christmas brought with it all kinds of magic and healing. Maybe that is the myth too many of us were brought up with. Thinking & wishing that this season would wipe away the bad and bring wonderous changes for the good. In life that doesn't seem to happen. I wish I were strong in my Faith to believe that it will come to pass.
But I am afraid that magic will not come and we must accept that fact. I woke up feom a dream last night of strange memories in my past and I am troubled now by them. I do not like growing old, with cancer and all the other transformationes that come with the years.
I wish you a pain free Holiday and the Peace of contentment and love. The only miracle is love.

Sent by J C R | 8:06 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Thanks Grandpa , and I wish for you the same. Miracles do happen everyday.

Sent by Teri Thomas | 8:08 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy
I want to wish you a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Thank you for the blog it is very helpful in many ways .

Sent by Luisa | 8:14 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Hi Leroy,

I wish the same for you and your loved ones. I pray that this year is one of healing and comfort for you, no pain, no more painful procedures. And a mircacle couldn't hurt either,

Lianne

Sent by Lianne Friedman | 8:26 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Enjoy your family and friends.
Comfort and Joy.

Sent by Claire | 8:50 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy,
Wishing you and your family a Merry Christmas! May the new year bring improved health and healing to you. You are always in our prayers.

Sent by Nancy Owen | 8:58 AM ET | 12-21-2007

and a very Merry Christmas to you and Laurie!

sincere thanks for all you have done for this blog family!

Sent by Cindy Williams | 8:59 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy,
Thank you.
You remind each and every one of us who have healed what a blessing it is not to be in pain. It is a luxury to be comfortable, and so we survivors become much more aware of, and have true compassion for, those who are not- be it due to illness, poverty, or whatever.
I too have found that this time of year can be particularly aggravating, perhaps because to those of us who have been through hell the cacophony of ever-increasing consumerism reflects a self-indulgence that I personally find intolerable now. At the same time, I am humbly grateful that what is meaningful has come into sharper focus, and that I have been given the time to appreciate my family and friends. And that, as we know, is what Christmas is really about.
May you all find peace within and around you.

Sent by L. Holmes | 9:02 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Thank you Leroy, I am wishing the same for you! And thank you for continuing to give of yourself, it is the best gift I will receive this year...

Sent by Faun | 9:06 AM ET | 12-21-2007

I wish the same to you, Leroy.

Merry Christmas to all of you who write in and share your stories here (as well as those of who silently lurk in the background, reading but not writing in).

Peace to us all.

Sent by Karole Ives, Duluth MN | 9:11 AM ET | 12-21-2007

My kids are home from school,so I won't have computer time for a while. Leroy, I hope you and your family have a wonderful Christmas, free of pain and full of joy. May all your readers have a wonderful holiday as well. You are all in my prayers.

Sent by Jen | 9:11 AM ET | 12-21-2007

A Merry Christmas to you Leroy. I hope you find that peace and healing, no matter how long or short it may be. I too look forward excitedly to the festivities. Through all the laughter and banter and humor with friends and family, I have to acknowledge that it will be sorrowful joy in my heart. Nonetheless, it is still a beating heart!

Sent by Christine | 9:12 AM ET | 12-21-2007

wishing for all of us a christmas miracle....another christmas,another year and we are still here...i guess that is the miracle!!! so who am i?? what right do i have in wishing for more miracles....but i do i truly do wish...for all of us..a healing from a higher power and the will to live ...
merry christmas friends!

Sent by marianne dalton | 9:18 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy,

Doesn't everything we did in those years have some degree of goofiness? But, more importantly, the message sticks with us through all of these years. And, that was the point.

Mara, Thank you for taking the time from your family needs to post yesterday. I have always looked forward to your Mother's posts. And I was so pleasantly surprised to see her on the Ted Koppel special. She has been a wonderful example - pragmatic and optimistic at the same time. She is so loved by many, who've never met her. I'm sending wishes and thoughts her way and to your family.

And to all, I echo Leroy's wishes to have a bit of time where you can leave cancer behind.

Sent by Sheara | 9:23 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy and Laurie, Merry Miracle Filled Christmas!

Sent by Karen | 9:29 AM ET | 12-21-2007

love, peace, and calm to all of us this holiday.

Sent by ejd | 9:31 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Peace, love and strength to Leroy, Laurie, Stephanie and her family and all of those reading.

Sent by Lori | 9:37 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Me, too, Leroy. I wish you healing.

Love, Holly
Understudy for the old woman in the 4th grade play "The Little Clown Who Forgot How To Laugh"

Sent by Holly Anderson | 9:42 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Here's to Stephanie and her family. I will be thinking of you while I'm in church for Christmas. Thank you to you Leroy for giving me this space to share.

Sent by lisa | 9:44 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Good morning, Leroy and All. I finally felt like writing our annual Christmas letter last night. As I ended the note, I wished for all to find the blessings hidden in the moments of their busy, harried, or painful days. You said it so much lovelier. Thank you. I posted late last Friday but it didn't reach your blog for some reason. The Brain MRI results were benign. Now we are waiting for the hip MRI...and our family arrives tonight. There is so much to be thankful for this year.

Mara, you and your mother remain in my thoughts. My your days together be peaceful and soft.

Sent by glenda | 9:49 AM ET | 12-21-2007

To the family of Stephanie,
As I read your blog it brought tears to my eyes as it brought back the memories of our son's last weeks. He was on hospice for exactly 2 weeks. His father and I did most of the care still so nothing really changed that way. Even though we knew the end was near we couldn't wrap our brains around the fact that he wouldn't be with us soon. When the time did come we were oddly in a brief sleep and when we awoke he was gone. I don't know that I will ever get over the feeling of waking up and the quiet that was in the room and then more quiet when we turned off his oxygen machine. it was deafening. So my prayer for you is peace of heart while you go through this transition and may God wrap His loving arms around you and give you strength for what lies ahead.

God Bless you and keep you and thank you for sharing.

Sincerely,

Judy

Sent by Judy Voller | 9:49 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Thank you for your words today Leroy - I am wishing you and yours a very special Christmas. I especially thank you for passing along the message from Stephanie's daughter. Stephanie has inspired me (us) with her candor, wit, wisdom, and courage. She and her family have been and are much in my mind and heart this holiday season. Love to them and to all the people who visit this remarkable blog.

Sent by Peggy in MN | 9:57 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Thanks, Leroy, for your wishes for all of us, and for sending us Mara's comments about her mother's dying.

And on the lighter side :-), you and others might enjoy the Herman cartoon this morning: http://www.comics.com/comics/herman/archive/herman-20071221.html

Sent by M Wms | 9:57 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Well you did it again. I'm crying....
If you had any idea where I worked, this could be bad.

God Bless Stephanie and her family, and Leroy and all of us. We all could use that miracle about now... I'm just saying...

Sent by Brit | 10:09 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Hope you have a peaceful Holiday and New Year. And to Stephanie and her family, I pray for strength and peace with what lies ahead. She has been an inspiration to many.

Sent by Chris | 10:11 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Words utterly fail. As I face my first Christmas alone, the news of Stephanie???s condition hits especially hard.

I will keep us all, and especially Stephanie and her family and friends, in my prayers.

Sent by Bruce | 10:13 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Miracles do happen in real life. I lost my father to cancer in 2004, sixteen years after doctors gave him 6 months to live. Each sun rise and each triumph in the face of hopelessness is miracle. Wishing you well each day.

Sent by Daily reader | 10:14 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy and Laurie and all fellow bloggers, MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL.....and to Stephanie and Family, May God bless all of you and give you some comfort in your dark hours. My New Year's wish for 2008, May we all find a renewing of strength, healing and love. God Bless to all.

Sent by Teresa in WV | 10:18 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Thank you for your gift of sharing your experiences with wit and honesty. May the new year bring you comfort and joy and bring peace to everyone.

Sent by Linda Benson | 10:22 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Peace, love, and gratitute to all of you. Thank you Leroy, for your genuine Christmas spirit. Good will to all.

Sent by liz | 10:22 AM ET | 12-21-2007

We all hope to go with grace and at peace. I believe she has achieved both. A blessing.

Leroy, my Christmas wish for you and those you love: peace and joy in today and happiness found in the love of the people who participate with you here every day

Sent by Kathleen in Arizona | 10:23 AM ET | 12-21-2007

To you, Leroy, to Stephanie, her daughter, for all of us, I pray for peace. Peace is inside all of us, we just need to share it.

Sent by Sharon | 10:24 AM ET | 12-21-2007

I've been thinking of Stephanie and checking the comments, looking for her. We'll be thinking of her -- and sending our best wishes for peace.

Sent by Jan | 10:34 AM ET | 12-21-2007

I wish everyone who writes or reads this a special moment, day or even more to experience Christmas joy. To remember past joys, to look foward to the future as best we can. To Stephanie - it seems sad to leave around a holiday and that's not how I want to be remembered but on the other hand it could be a blessing if we just look at it from a different perspective. So I leave everyone with the blessing that they find something special in a day so special as Christ's birth.

Sent by Vicki (FL) | 10:42 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy, Laurie, Mara and all bloggers,

May your Christmas be what you want it to be and may it be filled with love.

Diana

Sent by Diana Kitch | 10:47 AM ET | 12-21-2007

God Bless Stephanie, Leroy and all of the inspiring people of this blog community who are fighting the good fight. Wishing you peace, comfort and contentment at Christmas and always...

Your Canadian friend,
Nancy

Sent by Nancy Boomer | 10:55 AM ET | 12-21-2007

My very best wishes to you and everyone involved in the blog. Thank you for your wit, humility and honesty. I look forward everyday to seeing your post in my inbox. Life is good.

Sent by Anita Apodaca | 11:02 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Lovely message, Leroy.

Yesterday we won a level 2 appeal with our insurance company to pay for my much needed, very expensive, cyber knife treatment for a new tumor on my spine. What a gift. What a relief. I needed a win right now.

Stephanie, Mara, and family, you are on my mind and in my prayers. Be at peace.

How can a heart be so full and yet be breaking?

Love to all.

Sent by Laurel M. Jones | 11:21 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Good Morning Leroy, Laurie and All,

Leroy, Thank you for your Christmas wish to all of us. It is indeed a cherished gift! And through your blog you keep on giving to so many. Tom and I send our warmest Christmas wishes to you for PEACE, HEALTH, and LOVE.

Laurie, Warmest wishes to you too for: STRENGTH, HOPE and HAPPINESS always.

To Stephanie, Mara and their family: Prayers are going up and a cloud of COMFORT comes your way. We are there with you!

To All, Both old and new memories for this Christmas. Loose yourselves in the joy of the season. Tom and I had the opportunity on Tuesday night when we attended a band concert at our granddaughter's school. Nicole plays the flute and she had a solo part in one piece. The whole band filled the room with music, then all was still except for Nicole's flute. They were moments of pure joy and for those moments nothing could touch us! May we all have such moments and may they come often!! Merry Christmas to All.
God Bless!!

Eileen Pruyne
Charlotte, NC

Sent by Eileen Pruyne | 11:39 AM ET | 12-21-2007

The first Christmas my family celebrated without my mother, and their granddmother, I bought an angel figurine with red hair, just like my mother had, and put it under the tree with the rest of the presents. It was from "The Spirit of Gramma." Each year since, that angel is part of the decorations and somehow shares in the spirit and memories of Christmases past.
May all of you enjoy the spirit of the season, no matter what that means to you; and rejoice in the memories that remain. I love the saying, "Don't cry because it's over....smile because it happened."

Sent by Marilyn Trujillo | 11:41 AM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy, Laurie, Stephanie and everyone connected with the blog--I wish you all peace and many simple joys through this holiday season. We are so fortunate to be here for each other!

Sent by betsey kuzia | 11:54 AM ET | 12-21-2007

I love your comments today. Even I remember your opening lines from the play since I was there. "Brr...'tis cold outside! But when it's cold outside we have a warm hearth inside." I think you chose the right profession, Leroy, although I'm sure you could have taught the acting community a thing or two.

I wish you all the joy and hope that the Christmas season brings. Here's to seeing you at our 35th reunion next summer.

Terry (Doan) Shelton

Sent by Terry Doan Shelton | 12:09 PM ET | 12-21-2007

I pray everyday for "all the Leroys" in the world. Some may not even know of this blog. But they still need our prayers and are suffering. I buried 3 family members this year, two due to cancer, one 46yrs old and 51 yrs old. I am a bit weepy too this holiday. I am seeing the real meaning of Christmas more than ever. God Bless All~

Sent by DiAnn | 12:15 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Stephanie, I pray you find peace now and know that God is with you and will not leave your side.

your friend
David

Sent by David White | 12:28 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy,
Wishing you and Laurie a very Merry Christmas and a very healthy and Happy New Year. My prayers and thoughts are always with you. God bless you.

Sent by Elaine B | 12:32 PM ET | 12-21-2007

I second the wish that everyone find some healing in this holiday season, however small that may be.

And thank you so much for the update on Stephanie. I was just wondering about her yesterday and whether she was facing the end of her battle. She and her family will be in my prayers.

Sent by N.R. | 12:34 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Stephanie, It is with a tender heart that I send prayers of peace and comfort to your and your family. May the coming days be filled with beautiful memories and shared times. Wishing everyone a blessed and very happy holiday filled with happiness, healing, and hope.

Sent by Suzanne Lindley | 12:41 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy,

Thanks for this moving message.

As my wife, the hospice chaplain, would be quick to remind me, there are all kinds of healing. Sometimes healing is physical. Sometimes it is emotional, or spiritual. And sometimes, as paradoxical as it may sound, even death can be a healing experience.

All of our lives are of limited duration. There's no one, neither with cancer nor without it, who will escape that reality. We all know this intellectually, but we're quite adept at a sort of denial that puts this truth out of our minds much of the time.

Mara eloquently testifies to a sort of healing that can come when people have the luxury - as we cancer patients often do - of approaching death slowly and deliberately, of working through Dylan Thomas' poetic advice to "rage, rage against the dying of the light" and coming out the other side, to a place where it is possible to "go gentle into that good night" after all. In the best of such circumstances, healing does come, both for patient and caregiver. It's a beautiful thing.

Carl
"A Pastor's Cancer Diary"
http://www.cewilton.blogspot.com

Sent by Carl Wilton | 12:46 PM ET | 12-21-2007

May peace soften our hearts and our hurts....wishing you all the feeling of love and gratitude for this day and every day we have together. This will be our first Christmas without my Dad and it will certainly be different. However, we will remember him with love and shed a few tears and a few jokes. To Stephanie and her family, wishing you love and peace as your Mom's journey comes to an end. On the day of my Dad's passing, I took a deep breath, thanked God for his life and said to myself.....It's all Good.

"If we learn to cooperate with the inevitable, life can be a joy to the very end." Albert J. Nimeth.

Blessings to us all and Merry Christmas

Sent by Karen | 12:47 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy,
I have been enjoying your blog for the past year and look forward to reading it daily. Thank you for sharing your reality and the openness of your heart. I wish you and your all-encompassing family a peaceful and loving holiday.

Sent by Bernadine Dawes | 12:53 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy: Thanks for sharing... I had the pleasure of meeting Stephanie and sharing a few emails with her as well. My thoughts and prayers are with her and her family at this time....

I hope you are doing well...and are staying strong... you and Laurie are also in my thoughts and prayers.

Peace, Love, and Happiness to all....
Krupali

Sent by Krupali Tejura MD | 12:57 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy,

Thank you for your kind words and especially all the reminders as you are "turning the corner" this week how we can find a glimmer of hope and happiness in even the littlest of things. I wish for your moment to be long, for your happiness to flow to the depths of your soul and for your Christmas to be the most wonderful it can be. Peace and love to you and your entire circle of family and friends.

Sent by Ed Brown | 1:27 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy,
Wishes for a precious holiday to you and yours...and to Mara, and indeed Stephanie, may God's love surround them, as she is taken safe into the arms of Jesus.
Wanda Amorose

Sent by Wanda Amorose | 2:00 PM ET | 12-21-2007

You are mistaken, miracles do still happen. When my son was 18 years old and a few weeks from graduation, he was diagnosed with terminal cancer. We ended up at MD Anderson and he had extensive surgery. It had spread to several nodes. It was melanoma and we were told there was no treatment for it. Chemo didn't work, etc. He was given 5 years at most to live with major surgery every year. Well, that was in 1984 and he will celebrate his 42nd birthday next month with perfect health since. God did heal him without a doubt. The doctors have no explanation. Why God heals some and not others is a question I cannot answer, but it does happen. My prayers to you. Nancy

Sent by Nancy Ostrander | 2:07 PM ET | 12-21-2007

To all of us survivors and to all who have gone before:
May this Christmas be peaceful. Silent night, holy night.
Thank you Leroy for your words. I wish strength for Stephanie and her family. May we all see each other on the other side.
Merry Christmas. And please God, a happier New Year.

Sent by Laura Stechschulte | 2:22 PM ET | 12-21-2007

To Stephanie and Mara,
Thank you for giving me the chance to learn from your reflections and responses to your experience of human life and mortality.
May the courage, clarity and love you have demonstrated through your lucid writing sustains you in the days to come.
As you have blessed us with your humanity, so we bless you.
Ceese

Sent by Ceese Stickles | 2:23 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Thanks for your wonderful message. Hope you are feeling better and staying strong! Hope you and Laurie and all your loved ones and to all who read you everyday, best wishes a happy holiday season. May we all find some peace and normalcy.

I am very saddened about Stephanie, but am definitely sending my own thoughts to her and her family and wishing them peace. Sandy Lathe

Sent by Sandy Lathe | 2:27 PM ET | 12-21-2007

I am thinking of you and your friend Stephanie. I began reading your blog because of my cousin Sally. She has ovarian cancer and is now like your friend Stephanie. This is very sad-- for all thses families and friends.

Sent by MT | 2:28 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy
Christmas blessings to you. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Every day is a miracle.

Sent by Miriam | 2:42 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy,
Thank you as always for your wisdom and the memories. You do remember the play correctly. I was a dancer and can still do the opening steps to "Sing dance away we go, searching for the mistletoe." And I can quote the closing lines of the healed girl "Look boy, see girl, my hands, my fingers, I can move them" then came the finale chorus "O Holy Night". Thank you Terry for the opening lines!

Merry Christmas and blessings to all.
Kathy (Minard) Van Orden

Sent by Kathy | 2:48 PM ET | 12-21-2007

We can not give up hope if that is all we have. Even if we are not suffering from a life threatening illness none of us is guaranteed tomorrow. We should try and live each day as if it was our last. In 1980 my uncle was given a less than 5% chance of living six months with leomyoscaroma. He lived a full and rich live for another 17 years as a geriatric counselor at MD Anderson Hospital. Leroy your blog has been so inspiring to all of your faithful readers. I wish you a year of good health, happiness and love

Sent by Chris D | 2:55 PM ET | 12-21-2007

This is my second post........I don't think my first one went through.

To Mara, I pray that your mom finds peace now. She is a very special lady. May God bless us all during this holiday season.

Sent by sasha | 2:56 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Your note and Stephanie's daughter bring back memory of something that has been discussed here often. Dwell not on the end but the journey to get there. As I grief the loss of my wife Molly to cancer 3 months ago, those words resonate with me. She enjoyed the journey and extended it as far as she possibly could. The destination is peace and it is waiting for all of us.

Sent by Steve | 3:13 PM ET | 12-21-2007

I add my prayers for Stephanie, her family and all victims of disease and injustice. Time is short for us all in one way or another. It hurts to see those that shine in our lives leave us.

I believe it is as the poet's words explained when we wave goodbye to the presence of our loved one; there is another shore where they are waving and shouting out a welcome.

Sent by Sara (MD) | 3:34 PM ET | 12-21-2007

This comment is for Mara.

Your letter resonates deeply with me. I lost my dad to leukemia in August of 2006. He was very sick in his last months, but we all held out hope for as long as there was hope to hold to. In the end we took turns taking care of him in the ICU and we took turns being ???the strong on??? with each other.
During that time, I vividly remember being unable to imagine a future without my dad. When I tried, all I could conjure up was emptiness - just nothing. It was always accompanied by this ache in the back of my head. The ache you feel when you are trying to hold back tears. I always think that must be where my soul lives???
The most difficult part of my dad being gone is the absolute knowledge that there will never be another person in this world who will love me like he did. There will never be anyone else who has known me every day of my life and who has seen me learn and grow and change every step along the way.
When I was with him, I was a ???special??? me. A me that I liked to be (and miss being). He twinkled when he looked at me. We made each other laugh. We got the other???s jokes. He was intrigued by my spunkiness; I envied his mellowness. We picked on other people (in a good natured way). We were thick as thieves. When we were together, I felt secure and loved and respected. We got each other.
When he died I mourned him and I do to this day. But I also mourn the me who I was when I was with him. I feel like I lost that piece of myself when he died.
That is why we cannot picture a future without our loved ones. We do this to protect ourselves. It is unthinkable to fathom losing an essential aspect of identity.
In time it gets better, though.
There was a pair of cardinals that returned to my dad???s birdfeeder every year. My dad loved those birds, and whenever he caught a glimpse of them, he would shout it out to anyone who was listening, ???Look, there???s the cardinal ??? the male. Oh, there is his wife!???
This year I found several cardinal ornaments. They are made with red feathers and they look very authentically cardinal-like. I put them on the tree and every time I look at them I smile. I know if my dad were here, he would get a kick out of the ornaments.
Mara, I guess I am trying to say that there is a reason that you cannot imagine the ways in which your life will change when your mom dies. But that is okay. You will get through it and you will be stronger. You will find a way to bring her into your life and you will find a way to smile again.

Sent by Tara | 3:37 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy, a very special post today. Thank you. You, Laurie, Stephanie and family, and all who read this blog will be in my heart and prayers.

Sent by dorothy in oregon | 3:38 PM ET | 12-21-2007

To Stephanie's family,

I look for Stephanie's comments everyday in the blog. You are in my thoughts everyday. May peace be with you.

Sent by grace | 3:49 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy,
You are a blessing to me, and your words make me stronger. It's funny too... when I read your words, I hear your voice.

Love,
Mike

Sent by mike | 4:12 PM ET | 12-21-2007

With tears in my eyes, I send love and prayers for peace and spiritual healing to Stephanie and her family, Leroy, Laurie, and all the rest of you in this blog family.

Mara - I find it impossible not to be sad, but the respect and admiration I feel for your mom is much stronger than the sadness. My own mom died a few weeks before Christmas two years ago. Like you, I couldn't imagine a world without Mother in it -- and really, I still can't.She is no longer with us physically, nor can she suffer any more. But I do believe her spirit is still around.

Sent by Doris | 4:18 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy,
Thank you for the heartfelt holiday message of hope and happiness. I'll do my best and imagine you sitting in that rocking chair.
Best to you and Laurie as well

Sent by Jeff Brauns | 4:23 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Mara, I spoke with Stephanie just a couple of weeks ago, and she sounded tired, but we had a good talk. I asked her if she was afraid of dying, and she said no, just afraid of being in pain at the end of her life. I trust that the staff of hospice are keeping her comfortable. I love your mom, her sense of humor, bravery, and her caring. I wish that we could have met in person, but I'm grateful for the phone calls that we had. I think that we helped each other. Please give her my love. I'm spending a couple of weeks at my mothers' home, and don't have her phone number with me. Tell her that I think about her often, and pray for you all.

Sent by Nancy K Clark | 4:48 PM ET | 12-21-2007

After reflecting upon Mara's message to us all regarding Stephanie, her Mom, I went to read "Crossing the Bar" by Alfred Lord Tennyson. It seemed to speak so eloquently for Stephanie and for all of us when it's our time "to put out to sea":

"For tho' from out our bourne of Time and Place
The flood may bear me far,
I hope to see my Pilot face to face
When I have crossed the bar."

Prayers for Stephanie, Mara and family.

Sent by Al Cato | 5:09 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy, As Christmas nears, I find myself thinking of all those great Christmas celebrations in the past with my family. So many of them are gone now for various reasons, but four from this horrible disease. I celebrate their lives and their fight with this monster. My Aunt had such style and grace as she succumbed to it. I will pray for Stephanie and her family in this difficult time. She has "Amazing Grace" and dignity, and my most sincere wish is she does not suffer too much more. We will all miss her comments. Sorry for you too, having to deal with this, and everything else this Holiday. I will see you Monday, and if not Merry Christams, Big Man!!! Stan

Sent by Stan Wozniak | 5:15 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Leroy and all my blogger friends, I wish you much peace and happiness. I wish for you to be strong in the battles that so many of you face. My fiance passed on Dec 1, and I am now with my family for the next two weeks. Time for healing and time to be with those that are near and dear to my heart. It will be difficult but I know Neil would not want it any other way.
May all of you find a place to keep you safe and loved this Christmas season.

Sent by Laurie | 5:30 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Dearest Leroy, Laurie and friends,

I wish I could have "met" you all under different circumstances. What a wonderful group of people. I truly wish for each and every one of you the best Christmas you can possibly have. You have strengthened my faith, restored my belief in the goodness of humanity, and enlightened me beyond belief with the humor, courage and beauty of your words.

Dearest Stephanie and your family: I will be thinking of you constantly and praying that you will rest easy, and go peacefully into the arms of the angels, if that must be, and that your family will be comforted to know that you will not be truly gone, ever, because you will live in their hearts, and ours, forever. May God be with you all.

Sent by Connie E. | 5:50 PM ET | 12-21-2007

LeRoy, Merry Christmas to you from Michigan. Prayers for you, Leroy, and prayers for Stephanie and her family also. May God give them the strength they all need at this most difficult time. Merry Christmas to all the bloggers out there!!

Sent by Deb from Michigan | 7:07 PM ET | 12-21-2007

Hi Leroy:
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on your blog each day. Your words are truly inspirational even when you are having a bad day. Those of us on this journey can truly relate to your feelings.
Best wishes for a Merry Christmas with your family and friends. I am thinking positive thoughts that your health will be better in 08
Fran in very windy Inland Empire, CA

Sent by Fran | 7:20 PM ET | 12-21-2007

It's Saturday AM as I catch up on the blog and though the post is a bit late, I want to wish you all lots of Joy and many many Blessings this Christmas time. You all continue to be in my prayers. Leroy, Laurie you are such a blessing to us and I just want to say a heartfelt "Thank You". We are blessings to each other on this blog and as I read the posts it gives me a calmness and peace on days I am feeling like I am being chased in a Pac Man maize. Really if feel like you are all gifts to me. Mara, know that you are all being held in prayer and I send a gently hug to your Mom.
Paula

Sent by Paula S | 9:17 AM ET | 12-22-2007

Leroy, will you be back here on Monday or will you take a holiday from all work and be back after Christmas? We shall just have to keep looking for you each morning. Meanwhile, our loving thoughts will be with you and your loved ones for a peaceful, painfree holiday. You have brought much Christmas Joy into our lives, thank you!

Sent by J C R | 9:29 AM ET | 12-22-2007

I left a candle burning in my living room last night, as a solstice celebration, and when I awakened this morning in northwest Montana, to that beautiful moon, I thought of all of us here in the Cancer World. The longest night has now passed, and with today's sunrise, comes the promise of light and hope and peace to us all. Merry Christmas...Rebecca

Sent by Rebecca Bauder | 9:39 AM ET | 12-22-2007

To Stephanie and family - I pray that love and light bless you and surround you and help you through this difficult time. Thank you for sharing of yourself here, I think you helped a lot of people.

Sent by Nichole in FL | 11:06 AM ET | 12-22-2007

Leroy,

Merry Christmas to you and your family. My husband who is also battling this disease reads your blog daily and we can relate so many times. Please know that we appreciate that you take the time to write even when I'm sure you are not up to it. You are in our prayers!

Sent by Robby & Dana | 1:19 PM ET | 12-22-2007

Merry Christmas Leroy. May the magic and wonder shine bright for you and your family.

And to Stephanie and her family, may peace and comfort be yours in abundance.

Sent by Linda | 1:54 PM ET | 12-22-2007

leroy, i missed you old bud. the reason that i missed you was because i was "back in" for a 10 day stretch. i had my stomach opened again (3rd time) a few unneeded parts were excised and something new was added. i am now the proud possessor of a colostomy. and leroy may i tell you something, IT'S NOT TOO BAD. even after only 11 days and with the help of the greatest wife in the world i can cope with it. it also helps that i no longer have to go through with what i have been going through for 6 1/2 years. let's keep fighting big man.

Sent by Gerald Carroll | 2:48 PM ET | 12-22-2007

Mara and family - Your mom is a great lady. I wear the socks she knitted me weekly. Please tell her that. She and I have been fighting the same battle and sharing emails for quite a while. I have missed hearing from her. We have been able to lean on each other and that has been so important to me and I miss that. Please let her know I am thinking of her. When I light my candle Christmas Eve it will have special meaning this year - It will be for all of you. She will make one special and caring angel when God decides it is time for her to venture on to her next journey. With love in my heart - Cathy

Sent by Cathy - Columbus,OH | 6:29 PM ET | 12-22-2007

Best holiday wishes from Italy to you, Leroy, and everyone in this caring community who read and respond to your blog, and may the season and coming year bring serenity and moments of joy.

Sent by Maris | 3:56 PM ET | 12-23-2007

Thank you, Leroy.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you and everyone here. I will be keeping you, Stephanie and her family, and everyone here in my prayers.

Sent by Lisa Lindstrom | 7:47 PM ET | 12-23-2007

Merry Christmas. I've been reading your blog since I saw you in the Living with Cancer piece. My wife has been battling advanced lung cancer since April...your comments help us a lot as we try to get as much out of each day as we can. Thanks very much. I hope you and your family have a wonderful holiday.

Sent by Michael Perry | 10:26 PM ET | 12-23-2007

Dear Leroy Stephanie, Mara, Laurie and all my friends on this site,

Leroy, first of all, I would like to thank you for EVERYTHING !!!! Your posts when you did not feel well, your posts when you were at your "best" - they all have had special meaning and have given me so much since finding you on this site. STEPHANIE, May God bless and keep you safe and warm wherever this journey may take you. You have been so much help to me and and an inspiration to so many people, which is so evident by what has been said so far. MARA, thank you for having the strength and courage to write, to tell us what is happening with your Mom
and to share your feelings and thoughts with us. I know this is a difficult time for you now, but please know we will always be here, waiting, whenever you may need us for comfort.

Laurie, I am so sorry to hear about Neil, but thank you for your kind concern and giving heart - for reaching out to us at this time has taken a lot of strength and courage on your part and I, personally, hope you will continue to let us know how you are doing. Thank you for your kind thoughts and well-wishes, especially at this time of year. I know your heart is heavy, but perhaps staying in touch with us will help to ease your burden.

MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW YEAR to everyone who has shared on this board, and to those who have read and not written. It takes everyone of us to hold each other together, and I am proud and happy to know I have been honored to have been a part of this site for so many months.

Love, Briana

Sent by Briana | 10:30 PM ET | 12-23-2007

To Leroy, Laurie and all of my friends on this site,
I hope that you find some peace and pain-free time this Christmas season. All of you have helped me with your words of encouragement and empathy during a trying year. I wish I could express the warmth and comfort I feel when I read Leroys' words and everyone's comments. My wish for all of you is a blessed 2008, with the strength, guidance and patience that you need for your journey.

For Mara and the rest of Stephanie's family, thank you for sharing your thoughts at this difficult time. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Once again, thank you all very much for creating such a caring community.

Sent by Lou Loggi | 10:05 AM ET | 12-24-2007

Stephanie and Mara,

On this Christmas Eve I pray for you both and for your family. I wish the best for you in whatever way the journey continues.

Sent by Geoff | 3:09 PM ET | 12-24-2007

I'm sorry to learn of Stephanie's situation. This is not the time of year to have this happen, but of course no time is good. Cancer has the audacity not to care about the time of year, or the unfinished plans, the pain and suffering, or the anguished families.

We, the 'chosen' warriors, need to fight and raise money to help cure all cancers. Let ours be the last generation to suffer from this terrible disease!

Sent by Scott S. | 3:57 PM ET | 12-24-2007