Good for you, Leroy, good for you. Isn't that the secret of enjoying life? Living minute to minute, enjoying what's among you, seeing where life takes you next. You're our hero - so glad you were up and around and saw something magical while at it.

Peace,

Sent by Amy | 7:52 AM ET | 12-04-2007

Sounds like a plan!!

Sent by sarah | 8:01 AM ET | 12-04-2007

yes, so true, so true, i can relate to your thoughts today...thank you....
i just got some bad news that a friend of a friend just got diagnosed with metastatic pancreatic cancer, bad news, and shes so young, early 40's.....hard time of year, its good to focus on today.
peace everyone
jenn from maine

Sent by Jenn | 8:01 AM ET | 12-04-2007

Good Morning Leroy!

No doubt about that greeting, yes indeed! There is an upbeat spin on today's message and that is a good thing. Keep that spin, it is wonderful loaded with optimism.

Sent by Sue Chap | 8:02 AM ET | 12-04-2007

And I think that's a good approach to life in general, with or without cancer. All the time we spend worrying we're not spending living.

Tomorrow isn't promised to any of us; all we ever have is the moment. What do we do with that? Do we diminish it with fears of tomorrow or euphoric recalls of yesteryear?

Whether we are here tomorrow or next year or fifty years from now, all we have is now. Dear, beautiful, terrible, amazing, now.

Sent by Leonard from Alabama | 8:15 AM ET | 12-04-2007

Leroy,
You are amazing! You always hit the nail right on the head for me!
Last Christmas I had just completed four months of chemo, was facing another surgery and six weeks of radiation. I was fed up, hairless, bone tired and feeling mighty sorry for myself. Christmas was a mammoth inconvenience and I joylessly slogged myself through it. A horrible way to feel during a time of hope and renewal.
So this year I plan to bring on the lights! My daughter and husband have constructed a six foot diameter peace sign which will be festively painted and proudly displayed so the whole neighborhood can see it.
Bring on the season of lights! Bring on the season of hope!
Here's to hope for you and all of us that must deal with the darkness and despair of the cancer world.
I will light that peace sign for all of us.

Sent by Jessie | 8:16 AM ET | 12-04-2007

Good for you, Leroy! Enjoy every moment of this Christmas season. You have worked so hard to make it through this year, do not spend any more precious time worrying about things you cannot control! I hope you are "disconnected" this week! You continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.

Sent by Maria | 8:50 AM ET | 12-04-2007

I just love the blog. What a gift to follow the journey your on.

I remember you posting about it being your last Christmas or not being able to read the latest Harry Potter. Wow that seems like a long time ago.

Thanks for continuing the blog. What a privelage to walk this journey (in cyberspace) with you.

Sent by Melissa T | 8:59 AM ET | 12-04-2007

Wonderful life and spirit in your message today! Sounds like you are ready for a really good holiday. I am a firm believer that attitude helps the healing process.
Don't these years go by quickly? I can't believe that we are ending yet another year. You said it Leroy, "We are still here".

Sent by J C R | 9:22 AM ET | 12-04-2007

On my 59th birthday I was told my cancer had spread and I sobbed thinking "am I going to see my 60th birthday?". Now my perspective has changed because I was able to adjust my thinking and your blog today is very uplifting - THANK YOU LEROY. On the days when we don't feel well it's hard to look positively to the future but it's what keeps us all going. Thank you again for sharing ALL your feelings.

Sent by Vicki (FL) | 9:32 AM ET | 12-04-2007

Yep, another Christmas. It was even fun to put up the lights this year! Sounds like the drive was a nice break and as you said, you just never know what each day,week,month or year will throw at you. Just keep pushing on!! Glad to see your out and about. Sending warm AZ sun your way!

Sent by Jenene K | 9:57 AM ET | 12-04-2007

Hi Leroy and all -

Enjoy all the light that is given you and then go out and find some more! Indeed,Leonard - and everyone - we have Now - however fleeting - but we also, I believe, have - indeed are - the past insofar as we embody our memories -and the future as we give of ourselves to others and the memories they will have of us. It helps me to know that while my life and its lights -and the darknesses they illuminate -neither begin nor end with me.

Vaya con Dios

John Shippee

Sent by John Shippee | 10:07 AM ET | 12-04-2007

Amen Leroy! My dad has lung cancer and I keep wondering if this will be his last Christmas with us. But then again none of us are guaranteed that we will be here tomorrow. So I am going to enjoy this Christmas, like in the past years, and not worry about who will be here next year. Merry Christmas Leroy!

Sent by Wanda | 10:09 AM ET | 12-04-2007

Yes Leroy, enjoy the lights. None of us knows if we will be here next year, not even us w/o cancer. I will turn on my lights for you!

Sent by DiAnn | 10:22 AM ET | 12-04-2007

Leroy: Two words - you inspire.

Thank you,
Pat

Sent by Pat Cleeland | 10:24 AM ET | 12-04-2007

Hi Leroy and fellow readers,
My family and I have just officially joined the cancer world. Before I was a long time blog reader, appreciating everyones insiteful comments and sending out positive thoughts to you. But now cancer world has given my mother a front row seat. No, now at age 81 she is a player on that stage with stage IIIB or IV lung cancer. We are very surprised with this news since she went to the ER last week needing relief from a bout of constipation and 2 days later told she has lung cancer. As a non-smoker, nobody saw that one coming, even with increased shortness of breath. Fortunately scans show its not anywhere else but the one lung. Now its the decision whether to have chemo and port, surgery not recommended. She is weak now & we wonder how can she handle chemo. Today more questions will be asked and hopefully the right answers will be found since she is still in the hospital. I live 1200 miles away getting the phone calls while my 4 other siblings are on site with her (husband of 50 yrs passed 3 yrs ago). I would appreciate any comments. Thank you Leroy for keeping up with your blog.

Sent by Marge in Texas | 11:02 AM ET | 12-04-2007

Dear Leroy,

Yes, here we are a year later and most of us have made it. When I reflect upon last Christmas I never thought I would still have my husband with me this year. I can remember sitting around the dinner table with my children, each of us having the same look on our face as we were reading one anothers minds..........."Is this going to be Dad's last Christmas?" Well, he is still here!

So, I am going to try and do as you say and enjoy the lights and not worry about next year. Your blog has been my salvation. Sharing my own suffering and pain is the source of my deep connection to this blog and helps me to recognize that I am not alone.
Thank you for being you.

Sent by Sasha | 11:05 AM ET | 12-04-2007

I'm an accountant. Ever since my son had cancer, I want to tell my boss who cares about year-end financial statements, they are all man-made deadlines, nobody is gonna die if we don't make it right on time. Life is too short....

I wish everyone would stop and appreciate the lights, the season, and the company.

Big hugs to you, Leroy. Thinking of you everyday.

Sent by grace | 11:37 AM ET | 12-04-2007

I guess we get a little blase after awhile, learn to roll with the punches...You're right -- cancer is completely unpredictable -- CRAZY! Anyway, maybe all that drama is simply too exhausting to sustain...Two years ago, just after a mastectomy, I sat at our Christmas Eve table fighting tears, just sure there would not be another Christmas for me. This year, I feel pretty healthy but still believe it's possible this may be my last Christmas. However, I no longer believe any holiday (even Christmas!) matters as much as what we make of every other "ordinary" day we are privileged to live on this earth.

So glad to hear you are able to get our and enjoy the lights!

Sent by Doris | 12:16 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Dearest Leroy,
Living in the present moment is all any of us have. As always, my thoughts are with you every day.

Sent by Lyn Banghart | 12:22 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Leroy - you made me cry today. I wish you all the holiday lights and joy you can possibly stand.

Sent by Leslie | 12:47 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Tonight some of us will be observing another Festival of Lights, the first night of Chanukah. We commemorate a victory and the miracle of a one day supply of lamp oil burning for eight days and nights. Since cancer dx'd last year, I have a new personal tradition for this holiday, adding in wishes for the miracle of life for all of us!

Sent by Sheara | 12:53 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Leroy,
I am glad you are enjoying the lights. Last year I was still in chemo and not feeling great at Christmas.
This year is better even though we are packing to move from California to Pennsylvania on December 14. There has been no shopping and not much decorating around here. We do have a little tree and a very small nativity out. They will be packed at the last minute for the trip.
It will be a great Christmas as we get used to our new home and celebrate with a large family.
The best news of the day is that I got my PICC line out yesterday. It plugged up so they had no choice but to remove it. I seem to be doing well without it!
Put your favorite Christmas songs in the player and enjoy the day!
Charlotte in Temecula

Sent by Charlotte Kewish | 12:58 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Dear Leroy,

So glad you got out and were able to enjoy some of the decorations. Hope you can do more of that as all your drains and pumps come out. Blessings, hope, comfort and peace to you and Laurie, and everyone.

Sent by Connie E. | 1:09 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Hallalujah!!!!! It's all about one day at a time isn't it? That's the only good thing cancer has hammered home. One Day. Focus just on today. I'm glad to hear you're enjoying the lights. You go baby!
`

Sent by vkramer | 1:11 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Leroy,

Good for you! Give all that angst a rest and enjoy the holidays.

Blessings.

Sent by Diana Kitch | 1:13 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Much love to you today Leroy.

Sent by liz h | 1:38 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Tomorrow I will see the Christmas lights in a different way because of you. many thanks

Sent by Claire | 2:04 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Good afternoon Leroy & everyone,
Glad you got to enjoy 'light seeing.' I almost drove off the road when I passed by this house last nite, I thought -- 'wooooweee, they must have one bad %^& electric bill.' :D Nonetheless, it looked quite festive.

And, yes living with this cancer thang sure is outrageous & craaazy!

Sent by lisa | 2:09 PM ET | 12-04-2007

I just had to chuckle when I read Grace's entry. I too am an accountant and feel the exact same way. Wouldn't it be nice if those who live outside of CancerWorld knew what we know? For those of us who reside in CancerWorld, holidays are a period of reflection, at least it is for me. Where I've been, what I've been through, and wondering what the future will bring. Taking that annual measurement must be the accountant in me. Wondering if I'm going to be here next year reminds me to live each day as if I will not. Too bad it took a cancer diagnosis for me to see the light. So heads up non-residents of CancerWorld, learn from us. There is alot we can teach you. LeRoy, enjoy the lights. They are a symbol of the fire within us.

Sent by Kathy B. | 2:15 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Keep driving and looking at those lights. These are things that keep us going.
With care...

Sent by anne lumberger | 2:29 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Hi Leroy,
I remember about this time last year, things weren't going all too well for you. Your blog popped up in my email at work, so like I do everyday, I stopped what I was doing to read it. On this particular day, you mentioned that you though it was time to plan your trip to "Hawaii". I knew what you meant by that statement as I would imagine many others did. I sat at my desk and burst into tears....today I'm smiling.
Keep enjoying the lights for all of us....there's a lot to be excited about.

Sent by Judy (Suwanee, GA) | 3:07 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Hi Leroy,

My lights on my little pine tree in the middle of Kansas are on for you!

Love and blessings,
--deb

Sent by Deb Sull | 3:14 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Hi Leroy,
I live south of dupont circle and we have lights all year round, but I always enjoy the lights of the holidays. Saturday when I went out I noticed one of the older and larger apartment buildings had decorated the two small evergreens in the entryway with blue lights. I had never even noticed that that was the front of the building! The lights!

You are so lucky to have Laurie. Since my dx in September, my long distance boyfriend is so in denial he is pretty much a no-show.

Sent by Dianne (DC) | 4:26 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Hooray for you Charlotte. Hearing that you got your PICC line out made me day!

I'm glad you got to see the lights Leroy! I hope you see lots more lights, every day of the season!

Sent by Marcy in NJ | 4:32 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Leroy,

I think you are at the same point I am. It can make you crazy trying to determine how long you have. I had "the chat" with my doctor yesterday. Do I have a year? Two years? She said, there is being alive and then there is feeling good. She gave the same advice we should all follow. Enjoy today, don't postpone the things you want to do.

No one can tell us how long. A year and a half ago, things looked glum. My cancer survived initial "dose dense" chemo, surgery and radiation with additional chemo. I was put on a third chemo and voila...NED. Now it looks like it might be active, so, back on chemo. But it doesn't really change anything as far as plans. I'm going to do all I can until I can't any longer, then I'll find some way to make the most of that situation.

Congratulations on arriving at the same point every single person should be.

Sent by Karen D. | 4:45 PM ET | 12-04-2007

You know Leroy, I always get on during the day when I can, and read the comments. Today it occured to me that I was just beginning to discover your special secret and talent with this program of yours -
YOU have the wonderful ability to encourage people who may or may not be suffering the ravages of cancer, to think about themselves and others in a different way than ever before we all met you.
I am hearing the great wisdom and deep thoughts from others , that are coming from all these friends and the people you have attracted here. It is truly amazing and heartwarming. As for myself I have found great philosphy and wisdom in reading all the thoughts and comments. They lift me out of myself.
Thank you Leroy.

Sent by J C R | 5:03 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Leroy - you are the best! What a gift you have- we all are better for the thoughts you have managed to put on paper for the benefit of so many. May God continue to warm your heart, give you pleasure in the little things, and give you the strength to face each day with gratitude and courage. May we ALL be so blessed - CHD

Sent by CaroleD | 5:13 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Leroy;
All I want to say is "YEAH!!!!"...
Your attitude is the "bomb" as they call it...
Enjoy life and never give up...
I am routing for you!!!

Sent by Denise from Ohio | 5:52 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Loved what you wrote about seeing the lights. Such a gift to be in the day, one day at a time, appreciating the beauty in each moment, not projecting toward the future. Thanks for sharing your gift.

Sent by Lisa T. Jung | 6:08 PM ET | 12-04-2007

You and yours are in my thoughts and prayers this Christmas season. Thank you for taking the time to let us know how you are doing.

Sent by MKF | 6:14 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Leroy: Christmas already? How time flys.

Our SW Kansas weather just isn't cooperating for Christmas. Warm and dry...so dry in fact, next year's crops are in danger.

It's so hard to decorate for Christmas when it is more like summer. I knew I should have left the Christmas things up that I took down in July! Burge was making fun of having things up year round, but we left home New Year's Day for the hospital in Denver and didn't get back for months. I never seemed to noticed how thing looked, just happy to be home with the people we love. Maybe that's what Christmas is really about.

Nikki

Sent by Nikki | 7:07 PM ET | 12-04-2007

Amen, Leroy. I was in the same boat last year. It was so hard buying some special gifts....I was crying in the store trying to decide what I wanted engraved on the gifts. I truly didn't expect to be here this year. But here I am with a much better outlook of the future. One does not know when we will die but not this Christmas. I am going to enjoy those loved ones and laugh not cry.

Sent by Jackie | 7:45 PM ET | 12-04-2007

AMEN, Mr. Sievers!!!!! AMEN!!!

That is what I'm going to try to do, too. Just enjoy lights, decorations, music, the season, and the general kindness that seems to ooze out of people this time of year (except during sales, of course :) ).

Happy Holidays 2007, everyone,
Bobbie in Odessa, Texas

Sent by Bobbie Hollis | 7:50 PM ET | 12-04-2007

You know Leroy, day after day you talk about your trips to see your docs, your diagnosis, your treatment. I'm here hanging on to every word about how your CAR did! Did it pass its checkup? :)
All my best...

Sent by Hilary | 9:49 PM ET | 12-04-2007

I was just writing to a friend who is a survivor of Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma. She was somewhat depressed about upcoming maintenance and memories of some disappointing recent holidays. She had, in fact, been trying to apologize for 'bad days' on occasion.

I read this blog, Leroy, because she insisted, by the way, and when I stray away, she will direct me back to it on occasion by asking, "Did you read what Leroy said today?"

I do not want to lie to her. So I read this. (I am a cancer survivor, by the way, so I have credentials :)).

Here is my response to her, my lovely friend, and now to you, my new-found friend:

There may be down days but there are no bad days.

Sent by Tidewater Joe | 1:56 AM ET | 12-05-2007

Dear leroy
We should all live that way, cancer or no cancer. Its just hard to keep at it life gets busy. Thanks for bringing me back to what I know is important

Sent by ellie | 2:22 AM ET | 12-05-2007

To Marge in Texas

Here in Germany when someone your mom's age gets cancer they call it alten krebs, meaning you are old and something was going to get you and in this case it just happens to be cancer.

Not an easy time for the older one's of us.

Sent by Irene | 4:06 AM ET | 12-05-2007

Today's a snow day in SE Ohio. Remember the pure JOY the instant you were told "no school today." May an unexpected joy lighten all our days.

Sent by Susan Baker | 7:10 AM ET | 12-05-2007

Dear Leroy, It is like we are both on the same wavelink..where my thoughts wonder me off too. Hang in there buddy there are so many of us with same thoughts and feelings. You simply put it is words down on paper. Thanks.

Sent by Carolyn | 7:51 AM ET | 12-05-2007

Hi Leroy,
Glad you are enjoying the lights. A little while ago you wrote that some had said your postings seemed gloomy. You have a right to be gloomy. You have been through a lot. My mother-in-law was one for not wanting anyone to be gloomy -PRETENDING to be happy. I guess that is how she lived in denial with regard to bad things rather than face them. You should be free to say funny and sad things. That's life.

Sent by Maureen | 8:37 AM ET | 12-05-2007