We watch, we hope, we wait, along with everyone else, glued to the games in Beijing.
It's these games that give us hope, too. It's these little bits of normalcy that let us think that there's hope for all of us.
For a few minutes, here and there, we're not cancer patients. We're spectators, rooting for our athletes.
I almost forgot how much fun that can be.
7:15 AM ET | 08-13-2008 | permalink
Leroy, Anxiously awaited your posting today. And you are you and the real you is still in there! Excitement and hope and joy at watching us doing so well. G-d bless you and Laurie. You know that we love you and send our prayers to you.
Jan
Dear Leroy/All,
Yesterday was Scan day and as usual we got bad results. One would think you would get used to getting nothing but bad news. In two and a half years John has never gone into remission and never had a good report on any of his scans. The tumors in his lungs are getting larger but thankfully are not obstructing his breathing. His oncologist wants to try one more attempt at chemo. John has made the choice to go for it! I would like to thank everyone for their prayers. I thank God I have this wonderful support group. Peace to all.
The games are engrossing and diverting: all that strength and endless training challenged to put forth a perfect performance with billions watching.
The grinch in me watches and wonders how those gymnasts' knees will feel in 30 years!
Peggy
The games have been an interesting diversion.
When you first started the hospice debate I thought it was a no brainer but the more we talked about it at home we realized how private we are and what a huge change this would be. I hope you will share your experience. I know most people are usually satisfied.
Just an interesting tale. I saw my Priest yesterday and he wanted to pray and went on to pray for my doctors as they make decisions. I really wanted to scream out "what decisions". I know I am a bit of a control freak but I have felt for a long time that I have been making all the decisions and although I would hate to be dictated to I would like the person with the experience to steer the train a little.
Having yesterday's discussion is the last part of "getting your affairs in order" that I think I have to complete. Once again I love the control but couldn't somebody else do some of this?
Peace
Leroy I'm happy to hear this. I know from experience how valuable these times can be with someone you love. A year ago, two days before my brother passed, we sat together in his hospice room in Boulder watching the Rockies sweep the Yankees, enjoying an Old Style and laughing about his whacky theory of growing tomatoes. Being heavily medicated as he was he said the oddest and most hilarious things - I think he realized this and we were all amused. I have both good and bad memories from those final days, but it's the sweeter and very normal moments that I cherish. I will never forget Charlie's plea to us to never pity him or ourselves, to stay hopeful, focus on our advantages and live as normally as possible in the face of all the hardships that come with battling cancer.
Enjoy the games!!!
Leroy and Laurie
I don't think you will regret working with Hospice. My husband just died after fighting brain cancer for nearly 4 years. Without the help from Hospice I don't know how I would have gotten through this past month. They will intrude as much or as little as you want. Paul wanted to die at home, and they helped me make that possible, and I can never thank them enough. Try to not think of them as "bringing" the end, but rather making what is left the best it can possibly be. Herman Melville said: "Life is a voyage that's homeward bound." and Hospice is just there to help provide smooth sailing. Bon Voyage!
Leroy, the Olympic games do offer a lot of hope and if you let yourself enjoy the victory of ANY atheletes,their abilities,their strength, their determinedness,and the radience on their faces, that too can lift you up. I wish for you the good hopes and dreams for your and Lauries lives. Here's to you and the Olympic atheletes. (excuse any misspellings please)
For everyone and anyone that needs a lift to their spirit, please watch this beautiful movie at
http://www.findingjoymovie.com/
I was very depressed this A.M. UNTIL I saw and read what is always out there for us to appreciate.
Isn't that the truth! I actually watched part of the featherweight match yesterday while visiting dad at Hospice House. Then went home and cheered on the synchronized divers - China's team was amazing! And our men's beach volleyball team rocked as well (and we don't have to mention Phelps, I'm sure).
Go Team!
Can you believe that Michael Phelps and the US Mens swim team. I was alone in the house cheering out loud for each race!!!! My cats must think I'm nuts ;-)
ENJOY.
Leroy,
Couldn't agree more. How about our 41 year old Olympic swimmer- breaking records!! That's someone who doesn't give in, she pushes on to achieve her dreams. A real CHAMPION. Fun to watch.
Dear Leroy and Laurie,
I don't watch much sports but I really do enjoy watching the Olympics as well. The opening ceremonies were breath taking. Love the athletes and all their hard work.
Hoping you both are getting some comfort and support from the new bed and hospice. I know it was a hard decision to make.
Sending you both lots of love. Here's to enjoying the rest of the Olympics together.
I'm with you, Leroy. If you have cable you can see some sort of competition 24/7.
I love it! Go Phelps!
The games have been great fun. Couldn't believe the last leg of the swim relay that Lezak swam-my family and I haven't been so excited in quite a while. Too bad, though, about what is going on in Georgia. That puts a bit of a damper on things. Have a good day, Leroy.
got that right,leroy.
plus...us open tennis starts aug 25th.
I like to remember being able to do some of those sports, albeit not at that level.
Enjoy the games.
Sending peaceful wishes
Karen
Sasha, Good luck with the new chemo. Will be praying for you both.
The men's 4 x 100 relay was the most exciting event ever! And Phelps' reaction was just priceless. Its good that we can enjoy each others' victories as well as share in each others' pain.
Good morning Leroy and Laurie...I read today's refection as a metaphor for the hope I feel for humankind on this planet overall. My cancer is one small part of the greater pain, with the shared olympic effort as one shining example of how we can pull together and boost each other.
I also want to thank you and the entire community for yesterday's outpouring of reality and love. After Robyn commented including her critters, I found myself wishing for a hospice dog for you...someone to lay next to you, with kind eyes and a furry head to pet.
May the games continue!
Halfway through the relay last night my cable went out!! I knew they would win though -- that Michael Phelps is really something else. Isn't it nice for you to have something to watch other than reruns of Law and Order?
During the diving events last night we competed in "Competitive Lobster Cracking" and synchronised wine sipping. The competition was tough. I'm please to report the Americans had a victory sweep. We took all medals, the dedication to our sport is all consuming, but we stayed focused and victory was ours!
I love the Olympics!
Enjoy the games,
Debra Altschiller
There is joy in observing the human body, whole and healthy and used in joyful spirit! I like the fact that some of the "less popular" sports are televised on different channels. I'm going to check out the rowing and kayaking.
Leroy,
Well put Leroy! I too am enjoying the games for the same reasons. They are a lot of fun to watch!
It's good to get swept up in something else for a while, especially when we see people achieve wonderful heights. I hope you and Laurie can enjoy the Olympics cuddled on your new bed in your soft sheets.
Sasha - I am sorry about the test results - even though we are not surprised when the results aren't good, we still keep hoping don't we? I am glad that your husband is going to try more chemo. It's going to be very hard for you but please know that we are all here with you and holding you.
Leroy and Laurie - what a family you have grown around you. Fondest love to you.
Hope the ladies aren't too disappointed when the full moon reverts Michael Phelps' fishtail.
Hold Fast & smile.... moments of joy are always worth the effort.
Don Macleod
Leroy,
...and we're rooting for you, too!
Blessings.
Iam so happy you are sharing the Olympics some. Especially beautiful and wondrous was the best opening ceremony I can remember and they have all been awesome. I enjoy all the athletes from all the countries also.Each one deserves a medal. As do all in cancer world. We are with you and John too, Sasha.
Leroy, I know it's a "chick-flick" but if someone, through your media connections, get you a copy of "Mamma Mia," you wouldn't regret it. I smiled throught the whole thing in the theatre and downloaded all the music. Now, I'm not a muscial theatre kind of person, but there is a quality about this that makes you happy. Maybe fill the gap in between Olympic broadcast, which I too can't get enough of. Peace out...
Enjoy the Olympics Leroy!! dream, and remember the good old days.
Sending you peaceful thoughts.
Peace be with you.
Marelly
Isn't it astonishing to see how airborne human bodies can be with only the support of uneven parallel bars? May your heart take wing with the athletes' efforts!
Well, do you think your decisions of the past couple of days have made life a little easier and more "living-like"? It seems that you, Leroy, have a sound of joy in your writing.. You are always so honest that I know you aren't pretending.. So hopefully things are "easier" for you and Laurie..
Peace and love and GO USA!!!
I like to think of myself as an Olympic swimmer even though I would hit the bottom of that pool like a rock.
I just came back from visiting a friend's father in a nursing home. Even the old folks that looked like they may have "checked out" weeks ago perked up when the games were turned on. I saw a twinkle of youth in all of them.
Sigh...we can all dream. Enjoy!
Leroy, As always, you are on the money. I hope the transition is going well for you both. Thoughts, Stan
Dear Leroy and Laurie,
Glad to hear that you're having some fun. Keep on rooting and cheering and being a spectator.
Continued prayers for you both as always,
Dear Leroy,
Lovin' those Olympics and Olympiads! Talk about nail biters! My adrenaline level is sky-rocketing just watching it all -- Nothing like vicarious atheleticism, I always say!
Cheering you and the athletes on,
Kim Forester
Yes, I love watching the Olympics and always find the competitions thrilling and inspiring, no matter which country the athletes are from.There's always a bit of a letdown when the Games end though. But this year we'll have two more spectacles to look forward to: the Democratic and Republican conventions! Not quite inspiring, but often entertaining, at least.
Leroy, I hope you are sleeping better now that the tough decision about hospice has been made. And I hope the workers are making life easier for you and Laurie, and not intruding on your privacy too much. You are in my thoughts and prayers throughout every day.
Leroy - isn't it nice to just block out everything else and just enjoy something like the Olympics? Those chunks of time where we can get lost in another world are truly blessings.
Your upbeat tone today made me think that things must be going well at home. I prayed for that, as well as everyone who reads your blog, I'm sure.
Today I pray for physical comfort and quiet time for you and Laurie and whoever can come over and share your day. Carpe diem!!
Jeanette Carney
Enjoy watching the Olympics. They are good and interesting. For a moment 1 world comes together!
Page - Oregon
We escape, we learn, we continue to grow until we die.
On the last day of his life, my father was engrossed in a documentary on the hospital television, absorbing and learning new information.
I used to think, 'what's the point?' Some of us have very limited projected lifespans, why learn? Why engage?
I've concluded we can no more turn off our desire to learn and understand than we can consciously stop breathing.
Dear Leroy and Laurie,
I haven't seen much of the games. I am glad you are enjoying them. I am always amazed at super athletes since I can barely walk and chew gum at the same time!
I got the results of my endoscopy and ileoscopy...no polyps or cancer!!! Good news!
Charlotte in Rural Ridge, PA
I was hoping that you were enjoying the Olympics - I remember how you've said "it's fun to talk about something else" and almost brought it up several times!! Whenever Phelps is in the pool - I'm right there willing him on.....and it's so fun how much we can all get in to it - and get away from everything else!! Too bad that regular tv programming is not always this good!! ha ha
Hope your day is splendid - and as always lifting you up in prayer!
Hello, Leroy. It's amazing where an Internet search will take you. In this case, consider it another Jeep driver waving at you. You are not done waving yet. As I read your entries, I was very glad to see that you could find some comfort in living in the moment. I'm sort of a lapsed Buddhist. I only learned a little before becoming lazy and moving away from it, but I remember that living in the moment was paramount. I hope that Laurie finds some comfort in living in the moment. I am sure she does. I hope I can learn something from you while I cross your path. I can be hard-headed, but there is much to learn. I wish you and Laurie the best.
Finally had the time to sit down and watch some of the games myself. Watched the female gymnasts (my body could never do THAT, even when I was 16!) as well as the swimming. Don't you wish you could stay as cool, calm and collected as Michael Phelps and go on to win a gold medal? Enjoy take good care, both of you!
Dear Leroy,
Glad to hear you sounding positive and having some fun! Enjoy the Olympics. While you are pulling for them, I'll be pulling for you!
Some of my favorite childhood memories involve watching the Olympics with my family. When my mother was ill it happened that the winter Olympics were on. We enjoyed that diversion together. That summer, I watched the Olympics without her. It was bittersweet, but I still remember how much fun we had together cheering on the USA and the Czech Republic, her home country.
I hope you both have many more good times together.
Good for you, Leroy. Pretty exciting stuff. Sometimes we mute the sound so as not to hear the commentators. For me, first, second, third, fourth, et.al., they're all winners.
Hi Leroy, Isn't synchronized diving the goofiest sport ever???? I mean, if you can do those dives, shouldn't that be enough? Now they want you to be perfectly synchronized with a partner.
Oy, Oy Oy
Dear Leroy,
Glad to hear you are having some fun--keep it up.
Sasha, you and you husband are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope you get some good news soon.
Right on Leroy! I sure enjoy having the Olympics in our TV room on HDTV now...a splurge my spouse did, but he said he might as well have a great picture while he's stuck in mostly bedrest. Last night we watched the pairs of divers plunge into the pool...such synchronicity. I'm happy to see people from all over come together to celebrate this artistic excellence...and we can just watch from our comfortable chairs. So glad you wrote about the Olympics. Something we can all share, even though I don't watch all the events. Nice change of pace. Hope you are resting comfortably today!
Leroy,
Its so good to have some really exciting TV again! I love watching the smiles on the faces, the tears of joy and the stories. Such hard work paying off with gold medals! Every cancer patient deserves one of those too!
Sasha, I will keep you and John in my prayers. I remember how I felt when Neil decided to keep fighting. Its all we can hope for! You are very brave too!
Debra A, witty today.. that was a hoot! It sounded like a good time! Wish I could have been there!
Hope is so important where ever we are in life. These games always give me such hope for our world because it is so clear to me that a higher power has so much of a role in the outcome. May you be able to hold on to this hope Leroy and let it build into a tangible reality of how many lives you are helping/have helped with this Blog. You are transforming the world of cancer for many people. And simply put enjoy these games for the two week diversion they provide for you. With Love Graham from Sag Harbor.
SASHA,
So sorry you two had to hear bad test results again. Praying your new Chemo works.
Leroy and Laurie, enjoy every moment that you can, together.
Jane
The coolest part of the olympics is knowing that it is people all over the planet are doing the same thing at the same time (cheering for different teams, perhaps, but still...).
Sasha,
Good luck with the new tx...my thoughts are with you both.
Leroy n Laurie......love ya
GO USA>>>>GOTTA LOVE THOSE SWIMMIN' FOLKS!
What perfect timing for the Olympics. It gives you something to focus on and entertain yourself with. Seeing young athletes compete is always inspiring.
You too are a winner Leroy (and Laurie)! Don't forget that fact.
Dear Leroy and Laurie,
I am glad you went with Hospice. I was also thinking that even tho I am not ill, I could no more do any of those Olympic Feats than you could--almost all of the human race is in the same position vis-a-vis these astonishing athletes. Cancer or no cancer, most of us are just watching, same as you. And isn't it grand to see them??
PS--Hospice just gives you more comfort tools, you still run the show. Really.
Best prayers and affection, Rachel the Hospice nurse from Philly.
I forgot about everything yesterday, and went to ride roller coasters. Yea, a day @ Six Flags Great America. :) Love them, used love the ones that looped but, I am finding as I get older (dang) I can't seem to stop from getting my head banged during the initiation of the loop. Didn't like Superman (sort of lying on your stomach, yuk) and definitely the Dark Knight wasn't worth the wait (2 hours). Give me those hypercoasters and old fashion wooden ones. I took the last ride for my dad, he taught me to ride coaster.
At home watched the Phelps saga unfold and the agony of defeat for the US Women's gymnasts.
Baseball also gives me hope--especially as a Chicagoan who is both a Sox and Cubs fan (an unpopular position). So for me it's a television bonanza--2 baseball teams, the Olympics, and the upcoming Democratic convention. I'm in heaven. Salee
Yes! I've got some tough medical stuff going on here today and it is so good to hear good news from someone else. Thanks.
Leroy, just as every successful Olympian has had a great coach, I feel blessed to have you as the "Cancer Coach." You deserve a whole basket of gold medals for sharing with everyone.
"Strike up the National Anthem for Leroy." To everyone facing steep challenges, I will hold you in my heart.
I've seen so many comments wishing that you have good hospice caregivers. As a nurse myself, I always marvel at what kind of person it must take to work in hospice because of emotional attachment. My mom had hospice at home too and it just allowd her to be so peaceful and comfortable without having to worry about what our family had to do to take care of her. Well, she did boss us around a bit, but all with a smile on her face.
It's so great to see you enjoying the Olympics. Your spirit is wonderful... to hope, to dream. Such a wonderful man and we're so fortunate to have you.
love, Jennifer
Did anyone see the feature they did on what Michael Phelps' life is like when he's not in the pool? He's just a regular guy with a partner who snores! So what if it was a bulldog.
Love the featurettes they do on the athletes...
My deepest sympathy. I pray that your grief passes quickly even though I know that it won't. Please laugh,smile,talk & cry when you think of all the memories.
I am no expert at grief even though sometimes it seems that I am. Our mom died from the results of a car accident at the age of 43 in July 1956. Our brother in Vietnam 12 years after mom on August 25th,1968 he was 21.Now in 2007 another brother died of lung cancer August 23 he was 65. Many friends & family have passed but our memories can not be taken away. Someone said to me August is a terrible month for you and I said no, because I have a daughter & two grandchildren who whos birthday's are in August. We talk,cry, laugh, remember the memories and smile.
God Bless and keep smiling,
Darlene Weirick
Dear Laurie, Hopeyou are doing okay..thinking of you..yes you will smile again.
God Bless,
Darlene Weirick
I never knew of Sievers, or his cancer, or his blog. I first heard his words when his death was announced. I had spent the day watching the Olympics in my son's hospital room. An isolation room where my 31 year old "boy" recovers from an allogeneic (from a donor) bone marrow transplant, after a year long struggle with NH Lymphoma. The background noise of Olympic sports kept us company; the competitions an emotionally safe distraction. And then, Leroy's words were quoted during a TV news break. I heard his voice, and saw his words stream on the screen. His words hit me with the power of a sudden emotional ambush. I was, for a moment, breathless. I am a cancer survivor who now prays for a son's survival. I understood his roller coaster imagery. I knew the pain of cancer. I wiped my tears with the rough yellow sleeve of the antiseptic gown I must wear, wiping with latex gloves is useless. And I looked at my son, temporarily distracted on his computer, unaware of Olympics or news breaks, and was grateful for the very fact of his being. And for the privilege of being his mother. Thank you for your words, Leroy Sievers. I'm late... but grateful.
A Ted Koppel documentary focuses on his friend Leroy Sievers' "My Cancer" blog and the response it evokes.
A journalist for more than 25 years, Leroy Sievers worked at CBS News, the Discovery Channel, and ABC News, where he was the executive producer of Nightline. He wrote this blog daily until his death in August.
Download Leroy Sievers' radio commentaries and exclusive audio segments in the My Cancer podcast.
If you'd like to write to the My Cancer staff privately, please use our e-mail form.
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