What a wonderful Memorial to a wonderful man! It sounds so appropriate for Leroy. He will be able to see far and wide, his imagination can soar and the birds will sing to him.

Sent by J C R | 7:55 AM ET | 09-30-2008

What a beautiful tribute to their friend and their friendship. WOW! Trees are lasting symbols and beautiful to look at as it grows in what I presume is an equally beautiful setting. My hope is for a strong, tall tree for all to enjoy in the years to come.

1-2-3 Lifting......

Sent by Sue Chap | 7:55 AM ET | 09-30-2008

What a fitting memorial...a living, breathing testament to Leroy. The symbolism is most appropriate by choosing the mighty oak tree that in addition to its strength offers shade to those who need a respite from the heat and brings the beauty of the changing colors of autumn for everyone to admire and appreciate. Yes the mighty oak will lose its leaves deep into the winter but its buds will re-emerge once again with the renewal that is spring, a season of hope. Leroy's Tree will stand for years and years as a symbol of the goodness of Leroy and the difference he made in so many lives. Long live the mighty oak!!!

Thank you for sharing this with us, Laurie.

Blessings and prayers as always.

Sent by Al Cato | 8:17 AM ET | 09-30-2008

What a beautiful thing to do. And so nice for you to share that with us. He will live on in the hearts of so many, and now with a wonderful piece of nature to grow and grow, never letting him go.
Prayers,
Wanda Amorose.

Sent by Wanda Amorose | 8:24 AM ET | 09-30-2008

what a great story! and a great living memorial for Leroy!

Sent by jenngie | 8:24 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Dear Laurie,
Beautiful post today.........yes.......Leroy will be remembered by all.

Still lifting...........

Sent by sasha | 8:40 AM ET | 09-30-2008

What a wonderful tribute!

I hope you will go often so you can see it grow!

Sent by Liz L. | 8:46 AM ET | 09-30-2008

what a truly beautiful memorial and the important part, the love behind it.
G-d bless you Laurie.
Love, Jan

Sent by janice goldberg white | 8:49 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie, you and Leroy have some very special friends. What a tribute to Leroy. Every time they look at that tree they will remember the special friendship, the special big man.

I hope you will have a good day today. I think of you so often as I go through my day. I hope as time goes on each day will become lighter for you. Still lifting!!

Sent by dorothy from Oregon | 8:52 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie,
"Leroy's tree" also comes with a huge, beautiful garden!
Much love,
Continued prayers!

Sent by Laurie Hirth | 8:55 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie,
What a lovely story!! You and Leroy are so fortunate to have such wonderful friends and I know they are a great comfort to you now. I think that living memorial is a wonderful tribute to an "oak of a man". Keep healing.

Sent by kathie s | 8:59 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Dearest Laurie,
I read your post first thing every morning, but I have not had time to post for a while. As we who never met Leroy in the flesh grieve, I cannot even imagine the depth of your grief. You are in my thoughts and heart.
With love,
M.A. Sullivan
Charlottesville, VA

Sent by M.A. Sullivan | 9:17 AM ET | 09-30-2008

What an awesome idea! The Leroy tree.

Sent by Jan | 9:20 AM ET | 09-30-2008

How wonderful to have such faithful friends as seem to be.. You are truly blessed.. And so are they!!

A "Leroy Tree".. Bet it will outgrow every tree in the forest.. A TALL proud oak.. A reminder of our tall proud friend..

1 2 3 4 LIFT Laurie...
FROG

Sent by Patsy Elmore from Knoxville, TN | 9:20 AM ET | 09-30-2008

That is an absolutely beautiful way to honor Leroy. Lucky tree and lucky us for knowing him.

Sent by sarah | 9:27 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Good morning Laurie!
I love this idea of a beautiful strong oak being the "Leroy tree." How befitting. I'm going to plant a peach tree in honor of Dad. He liked peaches, so now he'll have his very own peach tree. We show our love in so many ways.
Sending love to you today Laurie, Linda

Sent by Linda Lee | 9:29 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie - Living memorials are simply the best. I cannot think of anything better than a big strong tree for Leroy. Thanks for sharing this with us.

Sent by JJG in Minnesota | 9:30 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Dear Laurie,
What wonderful friends and a touching tribute and memorial.
Sending you a hug.
Charlotte in Rural Ridge, PA

Sent by Charlotte Kewish | 9:41 AM ET | 09-30-2008

You made me cry.

Sent by Irene | 9:47 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Hello Laurie,
My mother-in-law did the same, in memory of her mother--it's a dogwood tree that is now growing strong in the backyard of her home, in central Illinois. Your friends will enjoy watching the Leroy tree grow--I hope you have a chance to see it from time to time. Take care,

Sent by seagull.girl | 9:49 AM ET | 09-30-2008

That's a wonderful, tangible way to remember Leroy. I hope you'll go to see it, Laurie.

Our leaves are just starting to turn and there's a cool change in the air. Take a walk on your canal path. I'm sure Leroy will be there with you.

Still lifting...

Sent by Kathy Barney from MI | 9:53 AM ET | 09-30-2008

I have a "Tommy tree" in my yard down by the river. A friend of ours gave it to my husband one week before he passed. They planted it together and my sister had a plaque made up for it. It is about time for me to bring the plaque in for the winter but the "Tommy tree" will continue to give me peaceful moments all winter long every time I look at it.

Sent by Deb from Michigan | 10:04 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie,

A lovely tribute. And a beautifully written post inspiring the following:

"The Leroy Tree"

T hat mountain where
H eaven meets earth is soon to
E ase into life a

L ong-to-live and
E ver surprising
R ed Oak. In repose, it promises to
O pen its limbs to shelter
Y ou.

T ribute, on that mountain both
R eceiver and giver, this Red Oak
E ndows one man's story, its roots
E tching lines both of loss and life.

From Maureen in Arlington, vA

Sent by Maureen Doallas | 10:14 AM ET | 09-30-2008

How lovely - Leroy's tree. That brings tears to my eyes. I know it will grow big and strong and beautiful for you, Laurie.
Love to all

Sent by Tina from Alton, IL | 10:48 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Lovely. A handsome,sturdy tree like a red oak is a fitting memorial to Leroy.

Sent by Catherine Bury | 11:02 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Just a suggestion Laurie - I would ask those lovely friends of yours in Austria to also plant a tiny vine which will grow along with Leroy's tree. The vine should be named "Leroy's Faithful Friends". This way we can all clasp our arms around him as he grows and strengthens. Such lovely thoughts!

Sent by J C R | 11:06 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie, Your friends are very special and should be cherished. A small tree that will grow large, just as Leroy grew large. The Alps what a great place to grow!! Thoughts, Stan

Sent by Stan Wozniak | 11:10 AM ET | 09-30-2008

What a fabulous gift! A tree full of life, bursting with energy and color. Laurie, you must be proud!

Sent by Kimberly | 11:28 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Good Morning Laurie,
Planting a tree in Leroy's memory, is such a thoughtful thing to do
It is a comfort to know that through turbulent seas or calm quiet summer days, that you have the friendship and love of you friends, knowing they will always be there for you.
Page - Oregon

Sent by Page Hendryx | 11:56 AM ET | 09-30-2008

Hi Laurie:
Leroy certainly lived his life like the leaf out on the edge of the tree:

The Tree of Life

If I must live my season
As a leaf on the Tree of Life
Please let me be a leaf that lives on the edge.

Let me see the sun, let me see the stars,
Let me feel the wind, let me feel the rain,
I want no sheltered place in the middle.

Too much sun may burn me,
Too much wind may tear me,
And leaf-miners may tunnel within me.

But o, how I will have lived!
a life full of blossoms, a life full of thorns,
Leaving nothing more for this heart to taste.
Love, Don

Sent by don winslow | 12:24 PM ET | 09-30-2008

May its roots dig deep and its branches soar just as Leroy's blog has done and continues doing. Have a good day.

Sent by Lucy Groh from Alaska | 12:26 PM ET | 09-30-2008

What a loving tribute to a mighty oak of a man, whose strength brought shelter and protection and calming presence. (This brings to mind a lovely little book, "Our Father Who Art in a Tree" by Judy Pascoe that you may want to dip into, Laurie. The unique story deals with love and loss ... and yes, a tree.)

"Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art ... It has no survival value; rather it is one of the things that give value to survival." ~ C.S. Lewis

A salute today to those loving friends, and to Leroy ... and to you, Laurie.

With love,

Sent by Kim Forester, Pullman WA | 12:27 PM ET | 09-30-2008

That is a lovely lovely memorial. I hope you can go see it often.

Sent by N.R. | 12:27 PM ET | 09-30-2008

you made me cry too - your words take me back to remember the early stages of my own bereavement. My next comment may strike some as strange but it is very true to me: even though the period right after my sister died was such a painful, traumatic, horrible lonely time for me that I dont think I could bare to go through again, on some level, I still remember it as a beautiful experience ... Perhaps because my emotions were at their freshest, and the pain I was in was itself a living tribute to how extraordinary a love I had for the person I lost. They're larger than life, these people we love and knowing they are not with us anymore often takes our breath away.

Sent by liz | 12:30 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie, such a beautiful tribute!

Sent by Dorothy - Los Angeles | 12:55 PM ET | 09-30-2008

I love the idea of a big American Red Oak growing in Australia in Leroy's name. It's a wonderful memorial.

Sent by Kathy G | 1:19 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Symbolic of all the other wonderful things that have grown out of Leroy's selfless decision to use his own death as a way to bless others - through the blog, the TV specials, and everything else.

May the oak grow tall and strong.

Carl
"A Pastor's Cancer Diary"
http://www.cewilton.blogspot.com

Sent by Carl Wilton | 1:26 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie~ I'm going to ask the impossible. Please don't think me morbid. Is it 'possible' for you talk about Leroy's last moments? It happened so suddenly. We were all taken off guard; completely stunned. Did he know what was happening? Was he consious? Did he say anything? WHAT HAPPENED? So many of us want to know, but are afraid to ask thinking it is wrong. I can only ask. If you say no, I will totally understand.

Sent by K | 1:30 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie,

What a wonderful way to remember Leroy! Thank you for keeping us posted. i want to recommend the book, "The Year of Magical Thinking" by Joan Didion to you.

Sent by helen miao | 2:08 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie,
I love the idea of a Leroy Tree. If this is not to much to ask, could we see a picture of the Leroy Tree? I know this sounds crazy, but I would just love to see it.

Both of you have been such a huge part of my life for so long. I am 40 years old. I too have Cancer. I had finished my chemo and radition treatments last November and now, one year later, I have two more lumps. I am once again experiencing the "slow, painful, agonizing water torture" waiting for the next scan. Leroy always explained the wait for the scans the best. It seems so much of my cancer expressions have come from Leroy . I have the "CANCER SUCKS" shirts. I love those! I wore those all through treatment. They always caused a little shock and giggle from the other patients. Since I was one of the youngest patient receiving chemo during that time, I always felt I needed to be the chearleader. I am short and loud, and never afraid to be heard. Always throwing big waves and "HOW ARE YOU TODAY's" to everyone when I came in the chemo room. I tried laughing and joking whenever I could. I took my lead from Leroy!

I can honestly say, today I am afraid. I do not want to go through another round of cancer without my Hero! He gave me strength. He inspired me to be a better person. I was always able to laugh and joke about the cancer and keep a positive attitude. However, tomorrow and the MRI scan seems like a life time away. Water torture!

Laurie, you are blessing to all of us. We appreciate you allowing us to be part of your world. I do have a question for you. I wrote a while back that I planned to go to Hawaii in November and toast to both of you on Maui at Momas Fish House. However, now I know I must go to Longhi's to do my toast to you and Leroy. I am not sure which Longhi's you went to....the one of Front Street in Lahaina or in Wailea? Let me know, and if God Willing, I will make the trip in November and raise my glass to the both of you.

You and Leroy will always be a huge part of who I am and who I hope to be! He is with us every day...I could only dream to be 1/2 the inspiration that you and Leroy have been to me.

BLESS YOU. You are loved! THANK YOU SO MUCH!

Sent by Amy Welbaum | 2:12 PM ET | 09-30-2008

I think Leroy would like this tree. I sounds beautiful and strong. The trees are turning yellow here in Moscow, and i can imagine Leroy's tree in a blaze of color.

Sent by claire | 2:24 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Dear Laurie,

The Leroy Tree is such a lovely tribute and knowing the nature of the American Red Oak, tall, broad and fast growing, it's quite appropriate. Its wood is considered valuable for many uses. Perfect.

Sent by Carolyn Lee | 2:32 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Don Winslow - Did you write the oh-so-beautiful "Tree of Life"? (I've added it in my book of favorite quotes.)

Maureen Doallas - How lovely is "The Leroy Tree"~

Such exquisite poetry here ...

Sent by Kim Forester, Pullman WA | 2:40 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie,

You write such beautiful things on a daily basis. Thank you for continuing to share Leroy with us even though he's not here anymore. I continue to keep you in my thoughts and send you much strength to deal with your loss.

Lifting...roni

Sent by roni | 3:07 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Maybe they will send you photos of its progress. Or better yet, maybe you can visit.

Take care.

Sent by Gyla Fowler | 3:24 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Dear Laurie,

What a beautiful thing to do for Leroy.....you are beautfiul too.

In Peace,
Lynda

Sent by Lynda | 3:35 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie,

I love the living memorial and have had trees planted in Israel for friends who requested that as an option rather than flowers or a donation to charity.

It is wonderful to think of strong new life coming after a death.

I hope you are growing and gaining strength each day.

Peggy

Sent by Peggy | 4:01 PM ET | 09-30-2008

What a terrific idea. There should be many more memorial trees planted--to remember all those we love and honor.

Sent by N. Holmes | 4:49 PM ET | 09-30-2008

No K ~ I, for one, do not want to know any details about Leroy than Laurie cares to share with us. Why, oh why, would you want to know any more?
The Tree Memorial is beautiful!

Sent by JCR | 6:03 PM ET | 09-30-2008

What a lovely gesture! Thank you for sharing this. I have a great visual of a person out for a walk in years to come, stopping for a rest in the shade of this great sized tree and hearing a big belly laugh!

Sent by glenda | 6:57 PM ET | 09-30-2008

What a splendid way to memorialize their dear friend Leroy, and what a lovely image to hold in our minds as we celebrate his life! May it bring you peace, joy and deep roots, Laurie!

Sent by Sarah | 7:38 PM ET | 09-30-2008

I grew up in the D.C. area, so I know the type of beautiful, strong tree you speak of. What a lovely, lasting memorial to Leroy.

Sent by NancyGM | 8:05 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie,

I hope I don't over step my bounds. I haven't cried this much in a while. This was hard to say but I didn't think you could do it yet.

This for K,

K,

You may not see this because I'm writing late in the evening. I'll copy this and post again in the morning. I think that it's important and hopefully it will help you.

I know that I don't have to speak for Laurie--she's more than capable.

But it's still very fresh and new for her so forgive her if she doesn't answer. Because it's been 3 years after my husband Pat's passing, I can answer for her, if she doesn't mind.

There came a point in Pat's life that, between the pain and the difficulty of breathing, that I didn't want him to be horribly uncomfortable. Because I had to make the same decision with my mother 6 months earlier, Pat and I had talked about the right time to 'drug' her/him up. We had said everything we needed say to each other; all that was needed was a peaceful passing. And that's what happened. Both my mom and Pat just slipped away. One moment she/he was breathing, then not.

If you want to know the real particulars --Hospice told me that my mom would show signs of her body stopping. Her skin tone became waxy and grey, sallow. (and it did) They told me to make sure I didn't massage her arms or anything; that would stimulate her and it wasn't what SHE needed. I held her hand and talked about everything she and I ever did that we loved (did I know she heard? of course not; but I know she did)-the trips, the goofy idea of renting out a cabin behind her fabric store ( oh, my God, I stood out in the middle of the road Up North in MI with a sign about the stupid cabin--how we laughed!!!).

I was talking about the trip she and I took to Florida and ran over the tail of a crocodile in the middle of the night when she actually stopped breathing. (Of course I'm crying now. Man, I miss my two best friends!)

When my husband was diagnosed with lung cancer, my mom had said that we'd see it through together. She didn't know at the time but she had the same darned lung cancer that Pat had. She died 6 months before Pat. I now realize that she'd show me what it looked like to die of lung cancer. I was SO afraid of Pat not being able to breathe, but, K, it wasn't awful. I held her hand and she truly just quietly slipped away. God bless her, she let me know that I didn't have to be afraid for my husband. It wouldn't be this awful struggle for breath. And it was true; it was all right for Pat. I snuggled in bed with him and he really just slipped away.

There really is such a delicate, small line between breathing and not...

I haven't talked about this a lot, but I hope that I've helped you face whatever is in front of you.

Again Laurie,

I hope I didn't over step my bounds. I haven't cried this much in a while. This was hard to say but I didn't think you could say it yet. Hopefully, I'm lifting...

Love, Kathy

Sent by Kathy Barney from MI | 10:01 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Dear Laurie,

what a wonderful tribute to Leroy and how it so beautifully illustrates the love you have for him. I am not a cancer survivor or caregiver of one who has cancer. I lost my mother in 1972 to breast cancer when I was 18 years old. Her battle was short with her dying within a year of her diagnosis. I was a teenager, too scared to have a clue about ways to help her or deal with my own fears and ultimately, my profound grief.

What this blog does for me is help me understand how my mother must have felt. In her fight, she had few allies. She was a single parent and did not seek help and I was too scared and immature to realize how to help her. But her battle was bravely fought, nonetheless. In her last few weeks, she wrote a list of things to do before she died -- things like certain paperwork and financial matters. The last item on the list was this "Keep fighting." To this day, I cry when I think about her courage in facing the beast alone.

Anyway, bless you and all the other contributors to this blog. The community that's been created, the thoughtful insights, and stories help so many in ways. If only there had been a 'My Cancer' blog in 1972, perhaps my mom might not have been so alone. Keep on blogging -- you are held in our prayers and virtual hugs on a daily basis.

Patty

Sent by Patty | 10:43 PM ET | 09-30-2008

Laurie,

I think the oak tree is a great tribute. When my dad and my grandfather passed away, my mom purchased a plaque in a memorial garden with both of their names, and planted trees and flowers she knew both of them would love.

That was a dozen years ago. Today, whenever I return to that site it gives me great pleasure to see the flowers in bloom and to see how much the tree has grown. It's a symbol that their lives continue on, not only in our memories and our hearts, but sprouting forth from the dirt in a tangible reminder of the beauty they brought to our lives.

The tears still come. But the splendor of what that tree and those flowers represent -- the goodness and love of those men -- helps to soothe the pain.

Sent by Scott | 10:54 AM ET | 10-01-2008