Teens are supposed to reject their parents' values during their formative years — maybe act out and smoke a little pot, go goth and skip synagogue, blast T.I. instead of ABBA... Of course it's natural, more about figuring out their identities than actively defying their parents. Turns out, some kids are figuring it out through religious faith stronger than that of their parents, and by choosing their own denominations. There are so many interesting questions here — if you raised your kid in one faith, and they strike out and choose another, is that a success — your child can think for him/herself, and is faithful — or a failure, since it's not your religion? Have your kids done this? Did you?
Thanks for your interesting program on this topic! At times my husband & I have thought we were alone with this issue. We were both raised Catholic & have brought up our 2 sons in the faith, although we have had ambivalent feelings about some aspects of Catholicism. Our older son, who had many Mormon friends throughout school, decided to become Mormon when he turned 18. Although we were quite concerned & upset about his decision at the time, we certainly couldn't complain about a # of aspects of Mormonism that have helped him negotiate those college years when he's been on his own- no worries about him drinking, using drugs or pre- marital sex, & he's getting excellent grades in college & making plans for graduate school in the near future. Our son is now 21, & still very actively involved in the Mormon Church. Although there is still a noticeable gap between him & us when we get together (we don't discuss our religious differences), we are grateful for the effects of his religious choice on the fine young man he is becoming.
Therese- Portland, OR
Speaking as an adult, I am far more spiritual than my parents - but not religious. I rejected my parents religion as a youth because of the hypocrisy and, frankly, fraud, I could see being practiced on the "faithful". I developed my own spirituality which drives my personal practices. Based upon that spirituality and those life practices I have raised my children, now young adults, and have not experienced the problem of my children rejecting the beliefs and values upon which they were raised.
This topic is based on a USA Today article that borders on religious propaganda. The article indicates that all the polls show that young adults are *less* likely to be religious, but then focuses instead on two or three individuals who are young and religious.
What about people who ARE less religious than their parents? My parents are minor Catholics and I am an atheist. What is so bad about that? I feel that the rise of religion among young people is related to a similar rise in narcissism and entitlement among young people. Many of the new style of religions tell young people that they are ''saved'' and ''special'' and that god loves them. Why wouldn't someone gain a sense of entitlement when being saved is so easy for the select few people who happen to attend a give church and so unlikely for those outside a give circle? It seems that in the past, going to heaven was not automatic unless you did everything according to a strict set of rules.
I found that my family didn???t really address religion, and I was not in an environment that really nurtured more spiritual connection and growth. I left my family for this reason at the age of 20, wound up homeless and living out of a tent in the desert, and also lived in ashram during some time as a monastic. I found that while I didn???t have much in these situations materially, I had so much in comparison with the way my life had been previously. It nurtured my soul, after for so long not having that part of my life acknowledged. After living with a family member battling depression (though undiagnosed), and having been sexually assaulted as a young person, to have something that gave me hope and more meaning to my life was crucial. To have happiness in my life when I didn???t in the years I should have made me realize there was more to life. That life could be different. I realize I could not have chosen a simply secular life or a life without questioning. To do so would have felt like death to me, never addressing who I am nor what connects me to others in this world.
Blessings,
Ananda
Good for the Buddhist caller! However Buddhism is very different form many other religions in that Buddhism's goal is to eliminate suffering through compassion and *wisdom*. In that sense, Buddhism is not very different from a strong feeling of secular humanism. In particular, Buddhism does not rely on absolute faith in some magical sky deity. The big concern for me is increase in magical and superstitious thinking.
As a great thinker once said "hard times flush the chump". It is sad and pathetic that in modern society where there is so much good evidence about how life and the world did develop that people still cling so strongly to fairy tales and supertitious nonsense. It kind of puts a kick in the pants to the optismistic idea that education has efficacy. The pull of self delusion is too strong and people would other flee into the mindnumbing comfort of the "faith" than face the scary big world out there.
Right on George from Oregon! This show was one of the most disappointing TOTNs in quite a while. I didn't mind that there were people who were religious calling in and talking. I am upset that the show would not entertain the opposing view point. That is very much one attitude of religious apologists that is strongly distain. That is, an aversion to criticism the crushing of dissent.
I am happy that dissenting views are being posted on the blog, but everyone knows that the radio reaches many more people.
As a child my family attended church often, rarely missing a Sunday. Later on down the road I was to find out it was only because my parents worried that I may not get the best education as it comes to morals or be able to make my own choice concerning religion. My parents are not religious, rather "fact-finders;" curious people that are humble enough to know they do not have all the answers. I believe this is why I chose or feel that religion is not a personal need. But, it was the respect they had for me that allowed that to happen.
Buddhism is less a religion than a philosophy, and therefore more worthy of our respect.
A given religion (take your pick) is, by definition, exclusive of all others. Certainly there are 'moderates' within a religion who do in fact accept the value of 'freedom of religion', but these moderates are rejected by the strict orthodoxies from which their moderate sub-religions are derived. (i.e. a Chasidic Jew doesn't recognize a converted Jew as truly Jewish)
The idea that I am going to 'heaven' and another individual is not (regardless of our relative moral standing) because they just so happened to be born into a family following a different religion is asinine and extremely short-sighted. It is a very narrow view of the world.
In the United States, one thing that was so heavily reinforced in us young students is the notion of 'freedom of religion'. Well, what about 'freedom FROM religion'? One should certainly be free to believe in and practice any religion-- indeed anything at all-- that they want to so long as it does not adversely affect others. For example: the hindering of stem cell research or, more importantly, violence and war based on religious fundamentalism. Indeed the argument can be made that religion is often at the heart of violent conflict throughout history.
A counter argument might be "yes religion has its shortcomings, but it offers so much in the way of morals, community, etc. etc."
Certainly religion can and does provide humanity with many good things, but I argue that it offers nothing that cannot be found elsewhere.
Why spend our days worrying about an afterlife that has no foundation in the empirical when we could be focusing on happiness, health, family, friends, and generally enjoying our one chance at life?
(my apologies for the lengthly missive)


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