Dear Political, Election, and News Junkies,
Please do not forget to eat, shower, and talk to your loved ones in the coming days. As the election builds to a fever pitch, and almost every night holds the promise of a press conference, debate, or thrilling commentary from the media elite, it is important to keep up your strength. Eat protein! Exercise! Listen to the radio — where Ken Rudin, who is a pro at these trying times, will be talking strategy with the likes of Katherine Seelye. (You can see her veep-debate-pre-game-show here.) Remember, Ken has done this before — he hasn't slept in three days and he can hold his breath underwater (why else would he be able to talk so fast? It's all about lung capacity.) But please, don't bang on the table, don't surf the internet at the same time, and remember to take a moment or two to yourself. You've earned it, junkies and junkettes. The world will continue to turn if you do not recalculate the electoral map for an hour or two.
P.S. Can someone pass this on to my fiance? I think he fell asleep mired in HuffPo.