"This would be bad"
Two days from now my wife and I are going to become the Most Loathed People on Earth. This is because we're going to be those parents who dare to bring an infant child aboard an airplane. From what I've been seeing online, people do not appreciate this. It looks like things can actually get pretty ugly if our little girl starts crying. Strangely enough, my fear of ruining the flight for everyone is shared by Jessica Alba.
Then I read stories like this that compound my fears even more. Airports might not be the most kid-friendly places.
I think what aggravates people the most is when they think the parents aren't doing anything to stop the crying. I just pray that our hour and a half flight from DC will be filled with other parents who give us that "oh-we've-been-there-too!" empathic smile and not some angry dude who wants to document my parental struggles on Youtube.
My plan if disaster strikes is simple: I'm going to make a big show of how I'm doing my best to calm my baby. I'm thinking of buying a tactical vest and filling it with pacifiers, snacks, and toys to show people, "Hey I'm really trying here." My other idea is to buy a big bag of lollipops and hand them out to everyone in the rows around us.
But who am I kidding? In reality, my wife will likely be the one calming our baby down by nursing her. But I'm still going to do whatever I can to help. I'm planning to entertain the little one with some of the new toys we're going to "unveil" on the plane. Let's hope it goes well.
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