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'Oh We've Got A Bigger Dressing Room Than The Puppets, That's Refreshing'

The members of Grand Funk Railroad, Don Brewer (drums), guitarists Mel Schacher (right) and Mark Farner play at a free concert in London's Hyde Park in 1971. Popperfoto/Getty Images hide caption

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Popperfoto/Getty Images

The members of Grand Funk Railroad, Don Brewer (drums), guitarists Mel Schacher (right) and Mark Farner play at a free concert in London's Hyde Park in 1971.

Popperfoto/Getty Images

The bigger they are, the harder they fall. That old expression came to mind when I read the headline of a recent press release:

'Grand Funk Railroad, Boston, Kansas at Aberdeen Proving Ground, August 11'

These three bands have sold a combined total of over 70 million records! Back in the day, each band could have filled a stadium of 50,000 on its own. Today, when I called the box office at the Aberdeen Proving Ground to ask if they'd sold out the 10,000 tickets available for the Aug. 11 show, the answer was, "Heck no. We'll have tickets the day of the event." Maybe it's not exactly the same as playing the state fair or that Spinal Tap moment when they find themselves opening for a puppet show, but it sure is a huge step down. This hit me particularly hard because Grand Funk Railroad was one of my favorites as a teen, and just about the first concert I ever saw.

So try imagining this: It's 2042. What three bands will be playing the state fair circuit?

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Muse?

Jay-Z?

Modest Mouse?

Just imagine your three-band nightmare fantasy and share it with us in the comments.