On this week's episode of Pop Culture Happy Hour, our pop-culture roundtable podcast, I administered to my co-podcasters a quiz about summer television that explores not only how weird summer television is, but — arguably — how weird my brain is, since it required me to make up a lot of imaginary summer television that was designed to seem like it might be real.
We wanted to give you an opportunity to take the quiz yourself, so after the jump, you'll find nine truly strange questions (I can say that because I wrote them) about summer television.
Now, please note — for all the fake answers, the underlying facts are also false. If I made up a show called Dave about a guy named Dave, the show doesn't exist, but Dave probably doesn't either, and if I made up a show about people getting married, the show isn't real, but neither is the marriage. Got it? Okay.
To hear how we did, please listen to this week's episode of Pop Culture Happy Hour.
1. Which is not a real episode of the new OWN series Are You Normal, America?
a. Is It Normal To Have Sex In Public?
b. Is It Normal To Pee In The Shower?
c. Is It Normal To Shave Your Back?
d. Is It Normal To Have Gone Skinny Dipping?
2. What is Randy To The Rescue?
a. A show featuring American Idol host Randy Jackson, in which he interenes to arrange music for events such as weddings and sweet 16 parties
b. A show featuring Randy McKenna, a West Virginia reptile wrangler who removes dangerous reptiles from homes
c. A show featuring Randy Velarde, a construction supervisor previously featured on Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, who builds new bedrooms for children with terminal illnesses
d. A show featuring Randy Fenoli, a bridal consultant from Say Yes To The Dress, who travels around to advise brides
3. Who stars in the Hallmark Channel Movie Operation Cupcake?
a. Dean Cain and Kristy Swanson
b. Candace Cameron Bure and Antonio Sabato, Jr.
c. Brian Austin Green and Melissa Joan Hart
d. Courtney Thorne-Smith and Matthew Modine
4. Which of the following is a real SyFy summer movie?
5. Which of the following is a real TV-movie update of an '80s movie?
a. Ordinary People: The Next Generation
b. Endless Love: A New Beginning
c. Son Of Dundee: A Chip Off The Old Croc
d. Blue Lagoon: The Awakening
6. The new show School Spirits is about what?
a. Ghost stories about educational institutions
b. Students attending bartending school
c. The world of competitive undergraduate cheerleading
7. Which of the following is not a real show coming up this summer?
a. Craft Wars
b. Insane Coaster Wars
c. Wine Wars
8. Which is a real upcoming reality show about a celebrity marriage?
a. Married to Jonas, about the marriage of Jonas brother Kevin Jonas
b. Gavin You My All, about the engagement of singer Gavin DeGraw
c. Free Lady, about the divorce of Lady Antebellum singer Hillary Scott
d. It Had To Be You, about the engagement of former American Idols Ace Young and Diana DeGarmo
9. Which is not a real upcoming summer show?
a. Barter Kings, a show about people who trade things for other things in order to obtain high-value items without spending cash
b. Redneck Island, a competitive reality show airing on CMT
c. Shark Attack, which follows the collection agents for a payday loan company as they attempt unorthodox methods of debt collection, including repossessing a diamond belly ring
d. World's Worst Tenants, which follows eviction specialists as they kick out bad tenants including an "unlicensed cosmetic surgery clinic"
e. Jersey Shore Shark Attack, in which doppelgangers for the Jersey Shore cast are menaced by sharks