NPR logo Sandwich Monday: The Pizza Cake

Sandwich Monday

Sandwich Monday: The Pizza Cake

I generally don't like cake, because it is too sweet, too bland in texture, and doesn't have enough pork products. So I was excited to see this recipe pop up on Buzzfeed. (UPDATE 10/21/2014: For those keeping score, it looks like So Good Blog rolled out this pizza cake recipe months earlier than Buzzfeed.)

This is what we were hoping for. Buzzfeed hide caption

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This is what we were hoping for.

Buzzfeed

I happened to have the main ingredients at hand — dough, sauce, pepperoni, cheese and existential despair, so I set to work. Turns out, it's a little more complicated than Buzzfeed made it seem. (And they call themselves journalists?) I couldn't find the right pan, and I didn't have enough dough to make the side crust, which I couldn't figure out how to line the pan with anyway. ... Well, the final result is below. It's less a cake than it is a bunch of pizzas that decided to stack together so as to be less of a target.

And this is what we got. NPR hide caption

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And this is what we got.

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Miles: I'll take mine with a scoop of garlic bread ice cream.

Eva: I like that I'm able to eat six slices of pizza while still technically only eating one slice.

Peter: What do we have for dessert? Salad pie?

Pizza Cake is great for parents who want to get the birthday party they're hosting over with as soon as possible. NPR hide caption

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Pizza Cake is great for parents who want to get the birthday party they're hosting over with as soon as possible.

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Ian: I like the concept of just stacking up food till it gets to my face, so I don't have to use utensils or move.

Eva: In the classic tale, the princess and the pizza, the princess couldn't feel the pepperoni under all the layers of pizza because she ate it.

Miles: The middle is so soft, I imagine this is what eating pizza is like for a baby bird.

Before taking his first bite, Ian once again experiences "pregret." NPR hide caption

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Before taking his first bite, Ian once again experiences "pregret."

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Ian: It's nice, because the top layer burns the roof of your mouth, and then the next layer comes up and burns it some more —

Miles: And then the next layer cauterizes the wound!

Mike realizes he's discovered the true meaning of cheesecake. NPR hide caption

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Mike realizes he's discovered the true meaning of cheesecake.

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Eva: You can see all the layers of pizza time here — pizzsaurassic, pizzozoic, etc. Turns out my degree in pizzarchaeology wasn't a waste after all.

Miles: I'm excited to see Buzzfeed's newest list: 39 Outdoor Activities You Can't Partake In Because You Ate Pizza Cake.

[The verdict: It's not exactly (how much you like pizza) x (number of layers), but it's pretty fun. As Miles pointed out, you lose any crispiness of crust that you'd get in a conventional pizza, but the obscene amount of cheese you're eating makes you forget about that pretty quick.]

Pizza Cake broke Kelsie's fork. Unfortunately, the NPR Internship Program gives one plastic fork to each participant, to last the entirety of her internship. NPR hide caption

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Pizza Cake broke Kelsie's fork. Unfortunately, the NPR Internship Program gives one plastic fork to each participant, to last the entirety of her internship.

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Sandwich Monday is a satirical feature from the humorists at Wait, Wait ... Don't Tell Me!

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