A Helpful Message To The TSA : Wait Wait ... Don't Tell Me! An idea for the new body scanners.
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A Helpful Message To The TSA

Prototype. Actual t-shirt may vary. hide caption

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Actual t-shirt may vary.

I was looking at images from the new body scanners in airports, and thinking it'd be easy enough to leave a message for the TSA by putting secret messages on my t-shirts. But I don't understand science. Would I have to make it out of lead? Or bullets? I asked my friend Nick.

I think the scanners work in the microwave ranges, so anything metallic, like aluminum foil or gold leaf would leave a hard shadow. Since they are secondary tests, I think you have to pass a metal scanner first, which might get set off by tinfoil. Maybe something like graphite drawn on fabric would be a good absorber as well, like on a black shirt.

He added:

I'm sure the TSA folks have a great sense of humor. We'll send you a get well card in federal prison.

Maybe I'll think of something more subtle. I could just draw extreme chest hair. Or three wolf moon. Any ideas?