Name the New NPR Ombudsman

Could Paris Hilton be NPR's new ombudsman? Probably not. But she may boost Mixed Signals' audience.
There's a great scene in Duck Soup, the Marx Brothers' classic 1933 movie, in which Groucho -- aka President Rufus T. Firefly -- is conducting a meeting of his Cabinet. "And now, gentlemen, we've got to start looking for a new treasurer." The minister of labor impatiently reminds him, "But you appointed one last week!" Groucho/Firefly responds, "That's the one I'm looking for!"
Well, ladies and gentlemen, we -- NPR -- have got to start looking for a new ombudsman.
As you may have heard, Jeffrey Dvorkin is leaving National Public Radio after nine years, the last six or so as our first ombudsman. In some ways, it's a thankless job -- having to read and listen to thousands of e-mails and phone calls telling you what NPR is doing wrong. Having to say, over and over, "Yes, we'll make sure Ken Rudin never says that again." You know the drill. But it's an important job, because occasionally we DO get it wrong. And because media outlets often are seen as arrogant, or imperious, it is important to have a conduit between the listeners and the organization. Jeffrey Dvorkin filled that role with distinction these past six years.
He is off to become the executive director of the Committee of Concerned Journalists. Although CCJ is affiliated with the University of Missouri School of Journalism, Jeffrey will be staying in Washington.
So, with JD going to CCJ, we need a new Ombudsman ASAP. And while I know senior management has begun a serious search, I figured I would do my part and take suggestions from the 12 or 13 people who read this blog. They can be serious, or sent in fun. I really don't care; I'm just lonely and am dying to get some e-mails. Maybe someone from Capitol Hill? Someone like Bill Jefferson, who could trade in his freezer so we could hire another reporter or editor? Or maybe someone from the sports world? Roger Clemens seems to be free nine months a year. How about Paris Hilton? I have no idea what she does, but someone once told me that that if you mention Paris Hilton in a blog, more people will read it.
I open it up to you: Who should be the next NPR ombudsman?
New Ombudsman: Beltway Bubble
I would go further than Milton Olsen. The ombudsman should advocate for the listeners. Period. I think NPR is perfectly capable of defending itself against listeners. Listeners lack the advantage of hundreds of broadcast outlets to project their views. Someone should speak for the listeners, even when they are widely considered to be wrong.
Recently, everyone knew there were WMD in Iraq. Some of your listeners thought that this knowledge was bogus, but they didn't get much of a hearing. Someone should have stood up for their unpopular view, rather than judiciously ruling them too extreme.
American media, including NPR, are drowning in conventional wisdom, and an ombudsman could help alleviate the suffocation of important views that originate outside the beltway bubble.
New Ombudsman: No Rather
In looking at the responses above, it is clear that an ombudsman, like Jeffrey Dvorkin is necessary at NPR. The idea that Dan Rather would be an impartial ombudsman is absurd. While he is certainly a highly respected and accomplished journalist, he is certainly would not be an unbiased analyst of how the news on NPR should be presented.
NPR's role is not to promote a certain point of view. Public radio is supposed to be an impartial broadcaster of the news, to inform the public of the issues and allow the listener to come to their own conclusions. Many times the opinions given on NPR are not overtly given, but rather elicited by the tone and language used in the reporting.
For example, this morning on Morning Edition, Army interrogator Tony Lagouranis spoke with Steve Inskeep about the tactics he used on Iraqi detainees. Mr. Inskeep's could not hide his distain in his voice about the actions this soldier engaged in and the military in command in General. This is not his role in the interview and I expect more from NPR. An ombudsman of Jeffrey Dvorkin's caliber is needed sooner rather than later.
Miriam-Webster dictionary defines an ombudsman as "one that investigates reported complaints (as from students or consumers), reports findings, and helps to achieve equitable settlement" Jeffrey Dvorkin did an exceptional job in this role. He was not afraid to give NPR producers and reporters the honest feedback that is necessary to point out what NPR should be, an independent, objective news source.
New Ombudsman: Stamberg
Susan Stamberg? I realized how much I've missed her this week, listening to Morning Edition.
New Ombudsman: Sedaris
David Sedaris made his name doing audio essays for NPR. Don't you think its time he gave something back? Let him take the job for a year -- and then require him to write a book and donate the profits to NPR. You can't lose.
New Ombudsman: All Wrong
I think you have the concept of "Ombudsman" all wrong. The way you're defining it and the way Dvorkin did the job, its nothing but a PR flack meant to be a firewall between the Public and "public" radio, which now claims to be a private corporation.
An ombudsman is supposed to be an independent entity that looks out for listeners, defending the parent entity only when it deserves it -- which in lapdog NPR's case isn't very often.
Dvorkin spent a lot of his time picking out things he would be allowed to deal with and ignoring all the rest.
New Ombudsman: Rather Rather
I hear Dan Rather is looking for work.
I'm probably not the only one to mention this.
New Ombudsman: Rather Conspiracy
I was going to suggest Dan Rather, only I don't mean it in jest. Dan Rather has been unjustly vilified regarding his daring to bring to light several pieces of evidence that show that George W. Bush used his father's political position to avoid endangering his lifestyle, and then had the audacity to be a slacker in that "champagne" job at the National Guard. It is that specific hypocrisy that is the most upsetting about his willingness then to send more patriotic men and women to Iraq.
It is quite possible that Rather was set up. Between his infamous, gutsy interview of George H. W. Bush in 1988 (when Rather relentlessly sought answers to questions about then Vice-President Bush's involvement with the Iran-Contra scheme, instead of hosting a meet the candidate party) AND his replaying the footage of the World Trade Tower #7 collapsing on September 11, 2001 -- yes, a rarely mentioned THIRD building went down that day - commenting that it was so reminiscent of footage we've all seen of buildings that are intentionally brought down by explosives -- Bush wanted Rather stopped.
He also wanted Rather's source, Bill Burkett, stopped, the retired National Guard officer who heard the call from then Governor Bush's Chief of Staff to clean up Bush's files and later saw it happen.
So Bush's people, hmm maybe Rove, got even by discrediting both Rather and Burkett, along with Mary Mapes, Rather's producer who brought us the story on Abu Gharab.
In March 2004, Burkett was contacted by a woman on the phone who'd seen him on TV and she arranged to meet him. In the end, an unnamed man gave him the memos. While they tell the truth, they came with arranged flaws and bloggers who responded unnaturally quickly to those flaws.
And Rather's source, Burkett, could not locate or actually identify his own source.
Then Moonves sold them all out. The panel that reviewed the information was run by Dick Thornburgh, Bush 1's Attorney General, who spent most of his time classifying documents and covering up stories about Neil, Marvin and George.
The point is that the destruction of a journalist has occurred, both slowly over the years as the news division at CBS pulled further and further away from its former dedication to journalistic principles, and then suddenly, when it let Rather and Mapes become Bush fodder.
So, who better would know about the dangers of letting journalistic integrity be compromised.
I strongly vote that Dan Rather be brought in and honored -- just as Daniel Shore has been.
New Ombudsman: Ramos
I propose someone FRESH! Jorge Ramos. He has it all: charisma, beauty, brains and crowds who worship him. He will bring millions of needed Hispanic listeners to NPR (they do speak English). And he knows more than a couple of things about journalism and politics. Remember him with Larry King during elections coverage.
New Ombudsman: Bill Moyors
Seriously, that's an easy one. What is Bill Moyers up to these days?
If he's busy, he may not want to take a pay cut to help out, but, wouldn't he be terrific?
New Ombudsman: Knight Ridder
Too bad my search engine didn't know Paris Hilton was here... I came when I saw Dworkin was leaving. Why not have one of NPRs crack journalists find out why he is REALLY leaving... is it for a tete-a-tete with Paris Hilton?
OK, seriously -- here in Philly our beloved Inquirer (and other papers) of the (former) Knight Ridder chain were chewed to the bone, spat out, purchased and then re-sold again a few months. Some excellent reporters and others of high integrity and skill gave it up or were canned. I suggest that NPR management contact the Inquirer's office here for a list. I know some are still out of work -- don't know if they got much of a severance to tide them over.
New Ombudsman: Nina Alan
The first person whose name comes to mind is Bob Edwards. Ok, I said that with Ken Rudin's tongue in my cheek, I apologize. One suggestion I think Ken might really appreciate would be a couple sharing the job, Nina Totenberg and Alan Simpson come to mind as a particularly dynamic duo.
New Ombudsman: Fripp
How about Robert Fripp? He seems pretty measured and studious. It would be great to hear him on the radio taking apart whatever issue in his English accent.
New Ombudsman: Charles Osgood
Years ago, a member of a non-profit I volunteered with took umbrage at a Charles Osgood comment and sent him a three-page diatribe outling his errors in great detail. She received a letter back from him, handwritten, with just five words, "You're absolutely right! Charles Osgood." She felt great and showed the letter to everyone. Mr. Osgood didn't have to change anything or make any promises.
So, hire an intern who has decent penmanship, if you can find one. Use Mr. Osgood's reply for everyone who sends you admonitions unless they appear on lawyer's letterhead (refer those directly to legal). Less expensive than any of the nominees so far, and probably just as effective. Consider Ms. Hilton if she has good penmanship, but not Mr. Colbert. He'll want to send sarcastic responses to everyone, and at least some of your listeners will identify the sarcasm and become offended.
Ombudsman: Rather Cuban
Dan Rather isn't real busy these days. And Mark Cuban is looking to hire him, so maybe they can do it together.
Ombudsman: Colbert
Stephen Colbert is really funny, Ken, especially around reporters. He'll bring an audience for ya.
Ombudsman: Boilerman
Recruit Boilerplate! Criticisms will bounce off of him. And it would be another advance in his long career. And fyi, just in case: Some people have believed this tale, but he is the creation of Paul Guinan of Portland, Oregon.
I am from Portland, but do not know Mr. Guinan. I am a retired public editor (ombudsman) for The Oregonian, know Jeffrey and know the slings and arrows as well as the occasional joys of the job. I will not attempt to unretire.
Ombudsman: Dr. Zatz
I would think the job requires a little compassion, a lot of humor, and the occasional prod in the personal responsibility department. Maybe you can get Dr. Zatz, Professional Therapist.
Even better, Paris Hilton and Dr. Katz.

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