Who Has Time For Terrorist Friends?

Copyright © 2008 National Public Radio®. For personal, noncommercial use only. See Terms of Use. For other uses, prior permission required.

MADELEINE BRAND, host:

Back to the campaign now. Sarah Palin has been making the charge that Barack Obama has been, quote, "palling around with terrorists." Our humorist Brian Unger asks not whether Palin's remark was fair, but rather, who has the time for pals?

BRIAN UNGER: Between family, friends, and work, there are never enough hours in the day. So how do you find time to pal around with terrorists, let alone lose weight? With the Terrorist Pal's Workout DVD. It's like having your own personal trainer to help you and your terrorist pals hang out and work out while burning twice the calories and American flags in half the time. All you have to do is say, time out for terrorist pals. The Terrorist Pals Workout DVD helps you manage your busy schedule, so you can have 20 minutes of quality workout time with your terrorist pals every day. Just listen to these people, who got the Terrorist Pals Workout DVD.

Unidentified Man #1: I'm 41 years old, and I'm in the best shape of my life.

Unidentified Woman #1: You know, I have a family. I have a job, and it's very convenient.

Unidentified Man #2: Well, the results were just amazing, and, I mean, literally, 20-minute workouts like they advertise is all it takes.

UNGER: And if you order now, you'll not only get the Serial Killer Pals DVD, but the Terror Pal key chain and the Terrorist Pals Workout Executive Edition. It's the advanced way to both run a company and a country and still have time to pal around with your terrorist friends. And here's the best part. You'll lose weight.

Unidentified Woman #3: If I can do it, you can do it, too.

UNGER: It's the fast, easy way to hang out, work out, and pal around with all your terrorist pals. Terrorize the fat right off your body with the Terrorist Pals Workout DVD. You'll say palsie. Your friends will say wowsie.

And that is today's Unger report. I'm Brian Unger.

COHEN: Humor from our palsie Brian Unger every Monday on Day to Day.

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