An All-New 'Race Anatomy'

Our humorist returns with an installment of Race Anatomy, a stirring drama of presidential politics.

MADELEINE BRAND, host:

Finally, in today's Unger Report, Brian Unger again takes a look at what's ahead in the presidential political drama he calls "Race Anatomy."

(Soundbite of music)

BRIAN UNGER: On an all-new "Race Anatomy," passion and politics like you've seen many, many times before. This week…

(Soundbite of song, "Chasing Cars")

UNGER: Barack, Hillary and the debate that threatens to separate the two forever. She wants to bomb the crap out of anyone who attacks America swiftly, prudently. But it's Obama who bombs when he can't seem to find the right words.

Mr. GARY LIGHTBODY (Lead Vocalist, Snow Patrol): (Singing) I don't quite know how to say how I feel…

UNGER: What would Obama do? How far will he go to protect the people he loves most?

(Soundbite of music)

UNGER: Also this week on "Race Anatomy"…

Unidentified Man: (Singing) I wish I could surrender my soul…

UNGER: John Edwards - one man gets the most expensive haircut of his life. But can a John prove he's an average Joe with a $400 trim? Or will this cut cost the quaffed candidate the whole kit and caboodle? Hold on to your seat. This race may just have a pulse yet.

And this week in "Race Anatomy," say hello to the comedian-in-chief: John McCain is back.

(Soundbite of song, "Crazy")

GNARLS BARKLEY (Pop Group): (Singing) I remember when, I remember, I remember when I lost my mind…

UNGER: Can a man joke about an IED and be president? Can a fella sing a song about bombing Iran and be commander in chief? And you thought that Dean scream was unpresidential. Well, this John's got a punchline for those without a sense of humor. Get a life.

GNARLS BARKLEY: (Singing) Does that make me crazy?

UNGER: Then Rudy gets rude with some crazy talk of his own.

(Soundbite of music)

Unidentified Group: (Singing) I'm confused, I've got words I'd like to use, but they've all been said before, so I'm going to use them all…

UNGER: The mayor's message? Elect a Democrat and suffer the consequences, America. So who will save us all? Find out who's tough and who's all talk in an all-new season of passion and politics on "Race Anatomy."

And that is today's Unger Report. I'm Brian Unger.

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BRAND: DAY TO DAY is a production of NPR News, with contributions from Slate.com. I'm Madeleine Brand.

ALEX CHADWICK, host:

And I'm Alex Chadwick.

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