Limericks Carl reads three news-related limericks: The no. 1 scientific study this week; Chimps: They're just like us!; Mice no longer need a comb-over.
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Limericks

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Limericks

Limericks

Limericks

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Carl reads three news-related limericks: The no. 1 scientific study this week; Chimps: They're just like us!; Mice no longer need a comb-over.

PETER SAGAL, Host:

Coming up, it's Lightning Fill in the Blank, but first it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme. If you'd like to play on air, call or leave a message at 1-888-Wait-Wait, that's 1-888-924-8924. Or click the contact us link on our website, waitwait.npr.org, there you can find out about attending our weekly live shows right here at the Chase Bank Auditorium in Chicago and our upcoming shows in Baltimore April 21st and Charleston, South Carolina, May 26th.

Hi, you're on WAIT WAIT...DON'T TELL ME!

DEBRA JERSZYK: Hi, this is Debbie Jerszyk from Manchester, New Hampshire.

SAGAL: Hey, how are things up in Manchester?

JERSZYK: Well, sun and cold and lots of snow.

SAGAL: Yeah, it's been like that for everybody. What do you do there?

JERSZYK: I am a stay at home person.

SAGAL: Of course you are. How could you get out through the snow drifts? Well, welcome to the show, Debra. Carl Kasell, right now, is going to read you three news-related limericks.

JERSZYK: Okay.

SAGAL: With the last word or phrase missing from each, or course. You're going to have to provide that last word or phrase. Do that two times out of three; you will win our prize. Ready to go?

JERSZYK: Ready.

SAGAL: Here is your first limerick.

CARL KASELL, Host:

Drinking much at my old alma madder was a rung on my higher ed ladder. I could earn a degree if I just held my pee. I was smart when I had a full?

JERSZYK: Bladder.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Okay.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: That's right. So researchers in the Netherlands tested the decision making ability of people with empty bladders and then with full bladders. And those will full bladders turned out to make better choices.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The effort it takes to control your bladder becomes a kind of general focus. It allows you to make good decisions about other things. Here's the thing though, if you really got to go, wouldn't the best decision be to say "to hell with your study, I'm going to the bathroom before I ruin these pants"?

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

ROXANNE ROBERTS: How can you be focusing on other things?

SAGAL: Well that's what we were wondering about.

ROBERTS: Is this another one of those dumb studies?

SAGAL: Yes, it's clearly one of these dumb studies. But they gave these people choices to make in terms that if they made the more complicated choice they'd get a better return. And they found out that if people needed to go to the bathroom, they made that choice more often.

ROY BLOUNT: Well, they think faster.

SAGAL: That's true. It's like as soon as they saw...

BLOUNT: Okay, okay.

SAGAL: Whatever.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: All right, very good. Here is your next limerick.

KASELL: We chimps here, unlike the giraffe, we boost morale in the whole staff. When friends make a joke, be it tired or broke, we manage to eke out a?

JERSZYK: Laugh.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: It turns out chimpanzees, just like humans, will laugh at things that are not funny.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: For example, researchers at the University of Portsmouth in England say that the chimps do this to be polite or to fit in with the chimps around them. What's interesting about this is in order to make this result don't you have to know what chimps genuinely find funny?

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: And if so, how do you know that?

BLOUNT: If they're laughing at people, that's not funny.

SAGAL: No. Taking advantage of the phenomenon, clever producers have now filled "The Tonight Show" audience with chimpanzees.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: All right, very good. Here is your last limerick.

At the stress in this lab we're appalled, so we're glad that the tests got recalled. And we mice, as we rest, have re-grown our fur vests. No more stress means we're no longer?

JERSZYK: Bald?

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

JERSZYK: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: There is a possible cure for mice baldness. Scientists at UCLA have discovered that when treated with a certain chemical compound, mice who had lost the hair on their back, grow it back. Scientists were looking forward to further research to see if it would work on humans, but then dozens of desperate balding men burst into the lab and started rubbing the mice on their heads.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

BRIAN BABYLON: I would take a mouse mullet any day.

SAGAL: Any day?

BABYLON: Any day.

SAGAL: You could just glue the mice there. That would work.

BABYLON: Oh yeah.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

BABYLON: I'll pull it off, man.

SAGAL: As long as they don't wake up in the middle of a date, you're all right.

BABYLON: I'll try to pull it off.

SAGAL: Carl, how did Debra do on our quiz?

KASELL: Well, you can't do better. Debra had three correct answers. So Debra, you win our prize.

JERSZYK: Yay.

SAGAL: Well done.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

BABYLON: All right.

SAGAL: Well done, Debra. Thank you so much for playing.

JERSZYK: Thank you.

SAGAL: Bye-bye.

JERSZYK: Bye.

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