Panel Round Two More questions for the panel: Mitt's Comedy Stylings, An Evolved Argument, and Dad's Last Hurrah.
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Panel Round Two

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Panel Round Two

Panel Round Two

Panel Round Two

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More questions for the panel: Mitt's Comedy Stylings, An Evolved Argument, and Dad's Last Hurrah.

CARL KASELL, Host:

From NPR and WBEZ-Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT...DON'T TELL ME!, the NPR News quiz. I'm Carl Kasell. We're playing this week with Faith Salie, Mo Rocca, and Luke Burbank. And here again is your host, at the Chase Bank Auditorium in downtown Chicago, Peter Sagal.

PETER SAGAL, Host:

Thank you, Carl.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Thanks everybody. In just a minute, Carl's children celebrate Father's Day by giving him a new neck rhyme. It's the Listener Limerick Challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-Wait-Wait, that's 1-888-924-8924. Right now, panel, some more questions for you from the week's news.

Faith, as you know, Mitt Romney is trying to lose his stiff robo-candidate demeanor this time around. And he's been pretty successful, perhaps in part because of his habit of doing what when he's meeting with groups of female voters?

FAITH SALIE: I wish it were copping a feel.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: It's in fact, the opposite.

SALIE: Keeping his hands to himself?

SAGAL: No. Reverse that relationship.

SALIE: Oh, let them grab and grope him?

SAGAL: I will give it to you.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: What he does is he pretends that they have.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This is apparently a joke that he does. He pretends that people goose him.

SALIE: What?

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: A lot of people have a standard ice-breaking technique when meeting strangers. That's very common.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: You might, for example, compliment their clothing. You might ask where they went to school. You might tweet them a picture of your crotch. You could do any of these things.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: But Mitt Romney, apparently one of the things he likes to do is if he's posing with ladies for a picture, is he likes to jump up in horror as if one of the people around him made a grab for some Ass-achusetts.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: He did this...

LUKE BURBANK: I think that's really cute. Actually, it's very cute.

SAGAL: He was caught on camera doing it this week while posing for a picture with some waitresses in New Hampshire. We're told he's done it before. Also, for big laughs, Romney likes to pretend he's a social conservative who doesn't believe in abortion rights.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: He's been telling a lot of jokes this week and he's been proving he does not have a sense of humor. We want to share this with you; this is another attempt at humor. He also made this joke at a diner. This is a direct quote of Mitt Romney. Quote, "I saw the young man over there with eggs benedict with hollandaise sauce with the eggs there. And I was going to suggest to you that you serve your eggs with hollandaise sauce in hubcaps because there's no plates like chrome for the hollandaise."

MO ROCCA: Oh gees, that's just...

SALIE: That is a long way to go.

BURBANK: So wait a minute, wait a second, we're electing my Uncle Mike?

SAGAL: Apparently.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Luke, scientists have tried to figure out for years why humans developed their powers of reason. Was it to help survive without fur or claws? To out compete other, larger, more powerful animals in the hunt for prey? Well a new theory says that we developed our high intelligence in order to do what to our fellow man?

BURBANK: Oh, I feel like I'm not going to like the answer to this. Is it about being, like, mean to our fellow man in some way?

SAGAL: Yes, it is.

BURBANK: Can I have another hint?

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

BURBANK: Because I kind of already had that one in my head, so that doesn't even count as a hint.

SALIE: Convince us your right with your answer.

BURBANK: Can I have a hint from Peter?

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Her hint was actually quite good.

BURBANK: Oh, okay. To lie to people or to talk people into things?

SAGAL: Right. Basically, to win arguments.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: To show other people that they're wrong. That's why we developed intelligence.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: It turns out, the reason human beings developed intelligence was not to be better hunters or better survive against other species, but to win arguments. See, the thing that has always puzzled people about human intelligence, how humans got so smart, is why humans are still so stupid.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Because we continually believe things that are incorrect and behave irrationally. And so people evolved, it turns out, the ability to convince themselves they were right even when they were full of it. You see, that's the explanation.

ROCCA: That's interesting.

SALIE: Does this mean that politicians are the most evolved among us?

SAGAL: Exactly.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: So while it's true your caveman ancestor was walking around like "ugh, ugh," there was also another caveman interrupting, saying, "actually, it's pronounced, "yeugh, yeugh."

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Faith, this week we read about a growing trend among expectant fathers. They're having what?

ROCCA: Oh, that sounds lovely. I like that.

SALIE: You know what it is?

ROCCA: Well, I'm guessing.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: It's not my question.

SALIE: Act it out, act it out.

SAGAL: Faith, can you guess a new tradition for expectant fathers?

ROCCA: Oh, it's great. It's great.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SALIE: A shower, a baby shower.

ROCCA: Yes.

SAGAL: That's what it is.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Well, they're not called baby showers for expectant dads, they're called dadchelor parties.

SALIE: Now it's ruined.

BURBANK: Yeah, now it's ugly.

SAGAL: Also known as man-showers or daddy-moons.

ROCCA: A man-shower?

SALIE: Man-showers sounds so disgusting.

ROCCA: Sounds really gross.

SAGAL: I know.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: A man-shower is what you get when you haven't taken a real shower in a long time.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No, a man-shower...

BURBANK: Daddy-moon is no peach, by the way.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SALIE: Daddy-moon.

BURBANK: In terms of grossness.

SAGAL: Here's the idea. You know that baby showers are usually for the woman's friends to come over and give her stuff.

SALIE: And they're the most boring thing that ever happened.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Well, you know, it's where you get stuff for the baby. It's all about preparing to have a baby. Dadchelor parties are about getting ready to lose your freedom. So there's lots of drinking and gambling and carousing.

ROCCA: And the doula gives you a lap dance.

SAGAL: Exactly.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: As I mention from time to time, I am the parent of children. And if they really wanted to celebrate, they would just do things that they're not going to be able to do once they have babies.

SALIE: Sleep.

BURBANK: Yeah.

SAGAL: For eight hours, that would be great. Have clothes without stains.

SALIE: Have sex with their wives.

SAGAL: For example.

BURBANK: Yeah.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: I was just in Hawaii.

SAGAL: Yes.

ROCCA: And I was watching hula dancers and it's so relaxing just to watch them. And I kept thinking, I bet, like, if you were a lady and you were going into labor and a hula dancer came in, it would be so relaxing that the baby would just kind of come out really easily.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: I don't know, I bet a hula dancer could get the baby out of you like just so easily.

BURBANK: Is this on your new blog, Mo Rocca, the world's worst obstetrician dot net?

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: It's just amazing. Like a hula doula would be incredible.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

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