Panelist Questions Spell Check, Philadelphia Free-dumb.
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Panelist Questions

Panelist Questions

Panelist Questions

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Spell Check, Philadelphia Free-dumb.

BILL KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME, the NPR news quiz. I'm Bill Kurtis. We're playing this week with Adam Felber, Hari Kondabolu and Amy Dickinson. And here again is your host at the Morris Performing Arts Center in South Bend, Ind., Peter Sagal.

(APPLAUSE)

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Thank you, Bill. In just one minute, Bill calls the cops to drop a rhyme on me. It's the Listener Limerick Challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAITWAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Right now, panel, though, some more questions for you from the week's news.

Hari, a school district in California has banned what book because it contains explicit language?

HARI KONDABOLU: Trump's last autobiography?

SAGAL: No.

KONDABOLU: OK. Howard Stern's "Private Parts"?

SAGAL: No.

KONDABOLU: "The Catcher In The Rye"?

SAGAL: No. I'll give you a hint. It's particularly subversive to the morals of children because when the children want to find a dirty word, they can just find them alphabetically.

(LAUGHTER)

KONDABOLU: The dictionary.

SAGAL: Yes, indeed. They have banned the dictionary.

(LAUGHTER)

AMY DICKINSON: No.

SAGAL: It's got all the words.

ADAM FELBER: I found them as a kid.

SAGAL: Yeah.

DICKINSON: You are kidding me.

SAGAL: No, no.

DICKINSON: The dictionary?

SAGAL: The dictionary. The Oak Meadows Elementary School in California has pulled copies of the dictionary from its shelves.

FELBER: And they're going to replace it with something called the tionary (ph).

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The problem was - it turns out that their dictionary in the elementary school contained definitions for certain sex acts that rhyme with things like Horatio, which I'm sure is now banned as well in that town. So they've removed the dictionary. They're going to check it for other naughty words. They have also banned the number 80,085 because it sort of looks like the word boobs.

(LAUGHTER)

FELBER: Well, that's true. Yeah.

SAGAL: All of America people are, like, writing out 80,085.

DICKINSON: But wait. I - OK. I just need - why didn't anybody think to do that a long time ago, like when we were looking up those words? Like, why is this happening right now - the dictionary?

SAGAL: Well, apparently, it's a dictionary they've had in the elementary school. And they thought that it was inappropriate for a dictionary in an elementary school to have such adult, complicated...

KONDABOLU: The answer is we weren't at rock bottom before, and now we're at rock bottom.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: That's helpful. Thank you, Hari.

DICKINSON: That's it. That's it.

SAGAL: Hari, please listen to Bill as he reads off what came across a police scanner on Sunday night.

KURTIS: 10:53 - about four stories above the Wawa, we got people out on the ledge; 11:11 - they're on top of trash trucks; 11:25 - someone lit a Christmas tree on fire.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: That was part of the blow-by-blow account of a riot that was caused by what?

KURTIS: The Super Bowl.

SAGAL: Yes.

(LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Philadelphia Eagles fans responded to winning the only way they know how - losing. They flipped over cars, looted stores, started fires, tore traffic lights out of the ground and broke into City Hall with a keg of beer.

FELBER: My takeaway was - Philadelphia, take down your Christmas trees.

(LAUGHTER)

DICKINSON: I know. Exactly. What is wrong with you?

FELBER: Honestly, it's February.

SAGAL: Jeez. You're asking for arson at that point.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: When the sun came up Monday morning, the Liberty Bell was the least broken thing in Philadelphia.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Of course, it was a kind of anticlimax when they had their big victory parade on Thursday, and there was just one survivor left in the crowd.

(LAUGHTER)

FELBER: Walking through the wreckage but still happy.

SAGAL: Oh, yes - delighted.

DICKINSON: Just one guy with a broom.

FELBER: A broom and a foam finger.

KONDABOLU: His only remaining finger.

(LAUGHTER)

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