Lightning Fill In The Blank All the news we couldn't fit anywhere else.
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Lightning Fill In The Blank

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Lightning Fill In The Blank

Lightning Fill In The Blank

Lightning Fill In The Blank

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All the news we couldn't fit anywhere else.

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

It's time to move on to our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds at which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the score?

BILL KURTIS: Maz and Faith each have three. Luke has two.

SAGAL: All right, Luke. You're in third place. You're up first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. On Thursday, the House chaplain, forced out by blank, rescinded his resignation and is coming back.

LUKE BURBANK: Paul Ryan.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, 17 states filed a lawsuit against the EPA for scrapping Obama-era blank standards.

BURBANK: Fuel.

SAGAL: Yes, fuel efficiency standards.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, legendary guitar maker blank announced it was filing for bankruptcy.

BURBANK: Gibson.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, Trump announced he was extending his delay on imposing blanks in the EU, Mexico and Canada.

BURBANK: Tariffs.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, Sweden shocked the world by revealing that Swedish meatballs actually have been blank the whole time.

BURBANK: Turkish.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Turkish meatballs.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, social networking site blank said it would let users opt out of certain data collection activities.

BURBANK: Facebook.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the latest film of the blank franchise broke many box office records.

BURBANK: "Avengers?"

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After getting stuck in the wilderness, a trucker hauling...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...A load of potato chips managed to walk three days to get help without ever blanking.

BURBANK: Eating any of the potato chips.

SAGAL: That's exactly right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

MAZ JOBRANI: Wow.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: This is the hero America needs but does not deserve.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Jacob Cartwright was delivering a truckload of chips from Oregon to Idaho. But thanks to a malfunctioning GPS, he found himself completely lost in what rescue workers described as a, quote, "remote and mountainous location." So he had to set out on foot to find help. And even though he wandered for three days without being rescued, with no supplies, Cartwright did not eat a single potato chip. He said, quote, "that's just the way I was raised. That stuff's not mine. I don't touch it," unquote.

(APPLAUSE)

BURBANK: Is it possible that the potato chips were just gluten free that he didn't want to mess with that?

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Luke do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Well, he did the impossible. He got eight right, sixteen more points.

SAGAL: Wow.

KURTIS: Total of 18.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Congratulations. We flipped a coin. Faith has elected to go next. Faith, fill in the blank. According to the Washington Post during a meeting in March, special counsel blank raised the possibility of issuing a subpoena to President Trump.

FAITH SALIE: Robert Mueller.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Sunday, T-Mobile agreed to purchase blank in a $26 billion merger.

SALIE: Sprint.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, Iowa's legislature passed the nation's tightest restrictions on blank.

SALIE: Abortion.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: To help students suffering from too much stress during finals, the University of Utah now offers blank.

SALIE: A special Mormon massage.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No, a crying closet. On Wednesday, 18 House Republicans sent a letter to Norway formally nominating President Trump for the blank.

(LAUGHTER)

SALIE: Nobel Peace Prize.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: The musicals "Mean Girls," and "Spongebob Squarepants" led the 2018 blank nominations announced on Wednesday.

SALIE: Tony.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the NHL denied reports that they...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...Banned a hockey player from blanking during games.

SALIE: Adjusting his jockstrap.

SAGAL: No, from licking other players.

SALIE: Oh.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: So according to a report from Sportsnet, after Boston Bruins player Brad Marchand was caught licking Toronto Maple Leafs player Leo Komarov for the second time during a game...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: ...The NHL called the team to ask that he please stop doing that.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: But the article was published. And both Marchand and the NHL deny that any request was made. They're not denying he licks the players. They're denying...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: ...That the NHL asked him to stop.

SALIE: (Laughter).

SAGAL: But seeing as the NHL was unwilling to take action, the Maple Leafs decided to take matters in their own hands. They've introduced their new star forward, a giant frozen metal flagpole.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Faith do on our quiz?

KURTIS: She got five right, 10 more points, a total of 13 but short of Luke.

SAGAL: Oh, my gosh. So how many, then, does Maz need to take the game?

KURTIS: Eight to win.

SAGAL: Oh, my gosh. Here we go, Maz. This is for the game. This week, President Trump suggested that the meeting between him and blank would be held at a town in the DMZ.

JOBRANI: Kim Jong Un.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, the Boy Scouts of America announced they'd change their name to BSA and officially open their program to blank?

JOBRANI: Girls.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a disgraced data mining firm blank announced it was shutting down all operations.

JOBRANI: Cambridge Analytica.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, Deputy Attorney General blank fired back at Republican lawmakers calling for his impeachment.

JOBRANI: Not Sessions. The other one - Roadstein (ph) Rodstein (ph) - why am I forgetting his name?

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Keep it up for 10 more seconds. It's anti-Semitic.

JOBRANI: Rosenstein.

(LAUGHTER)

JOBRANI: Rosenstein.

SAGAL: Rosenstein. Yes, you got it.

JOBRANI: I'm sorry.

SAGAL: No, you got it. I'm giving you the point. Following criticism of her performance on Sunday, the White House Correspondents' Association distanced itself from comedian blank.

JOBRANI: Wolf.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A museum in France was surprised to discover that half...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...Of the paintings in their gallery are blank.

JOBRANI: Fake.

SAGAL: Yes. The Terrus Museum, in the south of France, recently acquired a bunch of new paintings by the local artist Etienne Terrus of whose work, they're devoted. But someone soon pointed out that the majority of these works were, in fact, fakes. Curators are pretty embarrassed, especially seeing as if you look closely at the new paintings they acquired, you can still see some of the numbers poking through the colors.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Maz do well enough to win? He got a lot right.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

KURTIS: He got a total of 13. But he could not catch Luke who's just like Texas football - unbeatable.

(CHEERING)

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