Panel Questions Diners' Club, Never Forget A Swat, The Joy of Text.
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Panel Questions

Panel Questions

Panel Questions

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Diners' Club, Never Forget A Swat, The Joy of Text.

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Right now, panel, some more questions for you from the week's news. Alonzo, a restaurant in China launched a new kind of all-you-can-eat deal. Buy a $25 membership card, get all you can eat for a month. That promotion was so popular that two weeks later, the restaurant is now doing what?

ALONZO BODDEN: Are they still in business?

SAGAL: No.

BODDEN: Right.

SAGAL: That's what they're doing. They're going out of business.

BODDEN: Yeah. They're going to go out of business sale.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

BODDEN: You can't - $25 all-you-can-eat - you know how many Americans would fly to China?

(LAUGHTER)

BODDEN: You can't go to Golden Corral every night. You got to mix it up.

SAGAL: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: It was a months-long promotion. They lasted two weeks before they went out of business. In addition to only charging 25 bucks for unlimited food during unlimited visits to the restaurant for a month, they didn't place any rules saying, like, you can't go into the restaurant, eat as much as you want, leave the restaurant, hand your card to somebody else, who then goes in. That's something people did a lot.

In an interview, the owners said they expected to lose some money, but they thought they'd make up for it in volume and repeat business. That's good thinking. We'll lose money with each customer, but it'll work out because we have a lot of customers.

(LAUGHTER)

MO ROCCA: Math.

BODDEN: So was it, like, one guy paid 25 bucks, and they just passed that card around?

SAGAL: Absolutely.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The owners of the restaurant hope to emerge from bankruptcy and move on to their next venture, a Sears.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Mo, summer's here, and a helpful new study suggests that when you swat at a mosquito, the mosquito does what?

ROCCA: Cries.

(LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: No. You swat at a mosquito, mosquito probably gets angry. I don't - what...

SAGAL: Well, I'll put it this way. It affects your relationship with the mosquito.

ROCCA: The mosquito - the mosquito blames himself...

(LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: ...And wonders what he's done wrong. And it creates an real imbalance until somebody else comes along and says, it's not your - it's not you. It's not your fault.

(LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: Leave this house. The...

SAGAL: You really took the word relationship in a different direction.

(LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: It - the mosquito gets - well, actually, it probably gets very confused.

SAGAL: Why would it get confused?

ROCCA: Because it's very disorienting to be swatted.

(LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: You fly - you tumble through the air. It's like being shot out of a cannon.

SAGAL: Well...

ROCCA: Is it - is it an emote - you have to give me a little bit of a clue.

SAGAL: Well, it's something we associate only with humans and elephants.

ROCCA: Oh, they remember.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: They remember you.

ROCCA: Yup.

SAGAL: That is what...

FAITH SALIE: What?

SAGAL: ...We now believe. It's like, you know, it's totally embarrassing. They can remember. You're at a party, and the mosquito's like, hey, Glenn. And you're like, hey, you.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: According to Virginia Tech researchers, mosquitoes remember which of us taste good and which of us swat at them, and they avoid the swatters. That's what the study says, anyway. Really, they just wait till we're asleep, and then they come back, and they're like, hey, who's getting extra malaria tonight?

(LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: So - but if you taste good and you're a swatter, that's, like, a crazy relationship.

SAGAL: Yeah. That's very dysfunctional.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Yeah. I find this ironic as an older man that they can remember us, and I can't remember anybody. We should adopt their techniques. I guarantee if you're at a conference and you go up and bite somebody in the arm, they will remember you.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Alonzo, according to a new survey, 10 percent of people report that they check their phones while doing what?

BODDEN: Having sex.

SAGAL: Of course.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL, LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: I'm a little worried about how quickly you got that.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Sure, it's the most intimate act we can do with another person, but, come on, I've got tweets to retweet. And also, it is among really - really, when you think about it, the very worst time to catch someone checking Tinder.

(LAUGHTER)

SALIE: Did you say 10 percent?

SAGAL: Ten percent - the study found that 10 percent of people have checked their phone during sex.

SALIE: Wow.

SAGAL: Although, to be fair, some of them were trying to be helpful. They were just using Google Maps to find out where to find things.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Oh, and if you're using your phone for directions in the moment, do not use Apple Maps. You'll end up cuddling a dumpster behind a Burger King somewhere.

(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "HOTLINE BLING")

DRAKE: (Singing) You used to call me on my cellphone. Late night when you need my love, call me on my cellphone. Late night when you need my love, I know when that hotline bling that can only mean one thing.

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