BILL KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME, the NPR news quiz. I'm Bill Kurtis. We're playing this week with Adam Burke, Maeve Higgins and Helen Hong. And here again is your host at the Chase Bank Auditorium in downtown Chicago, Peter Sagal.
PETER SAGAL, HOST:
Thank you, Bill.
SAGAL: In just a minute, Bill checks out the new exhibit at the Guggen-rhyme (ph) Museum in our Listener Limerick Challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT - that's 1-888-924-8924.
Right now, panel, some more questions for you from the week's news. Maeve, research out this week by the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission shows that thousands of Americans had to go to the hospital in 2017 because of injuries caused by what?
MAEVE HIGGINS: Oh, waiting so long on the phones for their medical insurance?
HIGGINS: Thousands had to go - oh, so did they - oh, taking a selfie, they fell into the grand canal.
HIGGINS: Or the Grand Canyon.
SAGAL: The Grand Canyon. That...
HIGGINS: Thank you. Someone in the audience is, like...
SAGAL: You are a stranger to these parts, are you not?
SAGAL: Well, it turns out - I mean, the danger of this - we didn't know. It turns out you really should not combine pineapple and pepperoni.
HELEN HONG: What?
HIGGINS: Because the pizza man will hit - punch you in the face?
SAGAL: Well, you actually said it. The danger comes from what?
SAGAL: Yes. The answer...
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: ...Is pizza.
SAGAL: Seventeen hundred - I'm sorry, I take that back. Twenty three hundred people in 2017 in America went to the emergency room because of pizza-related injuries.
HONG: I believe it.
SAGAL: You do?
HONG: I believe it. I have been scalded very badly by a piping hot pizza.
SAGAL: That could be it.
HIGGINS: I've been scolded very badly.
HIGGINS: Don't you dare.
SAGAL: Yeah. As you say...
HIGGINS: Not again. You're on your own. This is a family-size pizza.
SAGAL: Well, you guessed right, Helen. Most of the injuries are you - things you would expect - burns from the hot sauce and cheese, cuts trying to cut it, choking on that little miniature plastic table they give you.
SAGAL: Other injuries are kind of embarrassing. This is true. One of the things that puts people in the emergency room is people reaching for a slice of pizza while they're in bed and falling out and hurting themselves.
SAGAL: So be careful with your pizza, America. And remember - if the ambulance doesn't get you to the ER in 30 minutes or less, you die.
HIGGINS: I wonder if, like, here in Chicago - because isn't there, like, the deep dish?
SAGAL: There is.
HIGGINS: Like, has they ever been, like, an infant lost in...
SAGAL: It's possible.
HIGGINS: Not a bad way to go, but embarrassing for the parents.
SAGAL: I think so. Helen, a big scandal at the U.S. Open this week. Many are saying a woman should be shunned, shamed or even sent to jail after being spotted on the television broadcast of the match doing what?
HONG: She was - can I have a hint?
SAGAL: Well, some people like barbecue sauce, some people like it sweet and sour.
HONG: She was eating chicken nuggets.
SAGAL: Well, she was, but what was she doing with them?
HONG: That sounds really lewd.
HONG: She was not eating chicken nuggets.
SAGAL: She was eating chicken fingers. You're right.
SAGAL: But it's what she was doing with them prior to eating them.
HONG: She was dipping them in both BBQ sauce and...
HONG: She was dipping them and then throwing them in the air and then...
HONG: ...Catching them in her mouth like popcorn. She was throwing them at the players.
SAGAL: She was - you're never going to guess, but I just enjoy you trying to.
HONG: I - it's - I can't imagine...
HIGGINS: But that's how unexpected it was, I think.
SAGAL: I know. Maeve, do you know?
HIGGINS: Yeah, I saw it. She was dipping them in Coke.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: She was - I know. You're shocked, aren't you, Helen? You never would have...
HONG: That's even...
SAGAL: ...Thought of that.
HONG: ...More lewd than what I was thinking.
SAGAL: I know.
SAGAL: This woman was seen dipping her chicken fingers in Coca-Cola and...
SAGAL: Eating them.
SAGAL: Yes. No, no, that's insane. You don't - you can't do that. If you want to be healthy, dip them in Diet Coke.
SAGAL: Tennis fans were aghast at the spectacle, with one claiming, I almost made a noise.
HIGGINS: But I just think - you know, that poor lady - she was eating the way, like, we eat when we think we're alone.
HIGGINS: And, like...
ADAM BURKE: And 4 (laughter)...
HIGGINS: And 4 years old.
BURKE: And 4 years old.
HIGGINS: And I just - I really felt for her because she didn't know she was on camera.
SAGAL: She didn't.
SAGAL: And this is hilarious because, of course, this woman became...
SAGAL: ...A celebrity, and she was interviewed. And it turns out she was there with her nephew's children, and she turned to them - this is true - before she started dipping the chicken fingers into the Coke and was caught on live TV, she turned to them, and she said, don't tell anyone about this.
HIGGINS: Oh, no.
HIGGINS: I mean, it did remind me of something that I do when I'm, like, trying not to overeat. I pretend that Michael Fassbender is watching me.
HONG: And then you just start stripping.
SAGAL: Why Michael Fassbender specifically?
HIGGINS: Because I'm, like...
HONG: He's a babe.
HIGGINS: He's so hot.
HONG: He's the hottest.
HIGGINS: So I'm just, like, oh, no more M&M's for me.
HIGGINS: I, like, push them away like a lady.
HONG: Is that your Michael Fassbender voice? Oh, no...
HIGGINS: No, that's my...
BURKE: That's her voice.
HIGGINS: That's my voice.
SAGAL: You're just - like, you're sitting there...
HONG: But is that the voice that you will use...
KURTIS: And so...
HONG: ...When you use...
HIGGINS: Yeah, it is.
HONG: ...When you will finally meet Michael Fassbender? You're, like, oh, no.
HIGGINS: Hello, Michael.
HONG: You sound like Julia Child.
HIGGINS: Make yourself comfortable.
HIGGINS: Do you want some pizza?
HIGGINS: Be careful now. It's at the side of the bed.
HIGGINS: You'll have to reach across me.
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