Panel Questions I know why the caged bird kills!
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Panel Questions

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Panel Questions

Panel Questions

Panel Questions

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I know why the caged bird kills!

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Right now, panel, time for you to answer some questions about this week's news. Paula, we've got a bargain for animal lovers like you. A rare bird called a cassowary is being auctioned off in Florida.

PAULA POUNDSTONE: Yes.

SAGAL: The bird's previous owner no longer can care for the bird. Why?

POUNDSTONE: Because the bird killed him.

SAGAL: That's exactly right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL, APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: The cassowary is a flightless but apparently not murder-less bird.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: It was described by the Florida medical examiner - and this is real - as having, quote, "no sense of humor."

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: It killed its owner two weeks ago. There were no witnesses, but neighbors reported hearing the bird saying, say flightless again - I freaking dare you.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Now, you don't know what a cassowary looks like. To picture it, imagine a slightly smaller version of an ostrich. But this one can jump up to seven feet in the air.

POUNDSTONE: Oh, my gosh.

SAGAL: It has a 4-inch-long razor sharp talon on each claw...

POUNDSTONE: Oh, my God.

SAGAL: And when it buries its head in the sand, it comes back holding a gun.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: They say despite everything, the cassowary - this cassowary will make a great pet...

BOBCAT GOLDTHWAIT: Yeah.

SAGAL: ...For a while.

GOLDTHWAIT: And...

(LAUGHTER)

GOLDTHWAIT: And Mother's Day's coming up.

SAGAL: That's true.

GOLDTHWAIT: Sure.

(LAUGHTER)

GOLDTHWAIT: Right?

(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "I'M LIKE A BIRD")

NELLY FURTADO: (Singing) I'm like a bird, I'll only fly away. I don't know...

SAGAL: Coming up, it's infrastructure week finally in our Bluff the Listener game. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to play. We'll be back in a minute with more of WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME from NPR.

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