We wrote yesterday about the winner of this year's Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, the annual competition to see who can write the worst first line of a novel.
And we challenged Two-Way readers to come up with their own bad prose. Many of you responded, and the results are so bad they're good.
Based on the "recommend" clicks for the more than 160 Two-Way entries, the "winner" is: Liz Lent (Marzipan).
Here's her contribution:
Hand gripped tightly around the gear shift, foot thunderously tamped down upon the accelerator, wind pounding him in the face like an angry child with a Whiffle bat, Manford Manly knew in his enormous man-sized heart that no one -- yes, no one -- could drive a golf cart the way he could and by God, that was something no one, not even the caddy, could take away from him.
We also asked for "bad" introductions to a story you might hear on Morning Edition or All Things Considered. My favorite comes from Adam Vlcek (AdamV):
From NPR News, this is All Things Considered. I'm Robert Siegel. We're going to take a moment to talk about another important subject for these times, namely the issue of dry skin. Itching oneself on the back of the hand or the inside of the knee has cost many a second date or business promotion. Now two brothers from Cambridge, Massachusetts, have found a way to use eggnog, that beverage of holiday office parties and often mistakenly purchased by people who like half-n-half but aren't paying too much attention in the store, to undo centuries of scientific research. Mara Liasson has our story.
Thanks, all. If you have thoughts about other fun we could have, drop us a line.