Goolsbee Is D.C.'s Funniest Celebrity

ROBERT SIEGEL, host:

Finally, we end this hour with a little comedy from a place that is not exactly laugh central: Here, D.C.

MELISSA BLOCK, host:

That's right. Last night D.C.'s Improv and Comedy Club held the 16th Annual Funniest Celebrity in Washington contest. And D.C.'s funniest celebrity? No, it is not Robert Siegel.

SIEGEL: No, somebody much funnier than Alan Greenspan. It was White House economic adviser Austan Goolsbee.

BLOCK: Goolsbee picked up where "Saturday Night Live's" subliminal man left off, adding snarky interjections to his monologue.

SIEGEL: Here he is on his close relationship with the president.

Mr. AUSTAN GOOLSBEE (White House Economic Advisor): I'm not saying that in 1961 we were, like, separated at birth in a village in Kenya. What I'm saying…

BLOCK: And on the country's top financial institutions.

Mr. GOOLSBEE: I would like to say one thing about some of our major banks - ingrateful bastards. The thing about them…

SIEGEL: On the economic crisis.

Mr. GOOLSBEE: It was okay because as we took office, you know, it was an all-star team of economists and we basically knew what to do - panic. What, we were coming in as let's react the right way when things happen (soundbite of scream). Let's just sort it out and start from the fundamentals. How do we throw money at this problem? And the thing is most of the lessons aren't recent. I mean, it's been a long, long time since things were this bad. So we kind of had to go back and look at the old textbooks - Karl Marx, Trotsky.

BLOCK: And here is Austan Goolsbee on Republican presidential contenders in 2012.

Mr. GOOLSBEE: You know, there's a lot of governors. There's obviously SP, wingnut, from Alaska who's a former governor - quitter - and you just cannot, you cannot rule out that by 2012 - there'll be a warrant for her arrest - that she will be the nominee.

SIEGEL: That's White House economic adviser Austan Goolsbee, the winner of D.C.'s funniest celebrity contest. Keep your day job.

(Soundbite of laughter)

BLOCK: There is, though, Robert, this truth that is not so funny, and that is that the contest, you know, is supposed to raise money for charity, but the Washington Post reported this week that the organizers haven't actually made any charitable grants over the last five years. They say the expenses and the salary for its founder are just too high - creeps.

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