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These days, between a surrogate, an egg donor and a sperm donor, it can take a village to create a child. We'd been reporting this week on the complex issues involving women who carry a child for someone else. Technology is helping many same-sex couples and others who never thought they'd be able to have children, but the law has not kept pace. For the final part of our series Making Babies, NPR's Jennifer Ludden reports on the legal debate over a key question: With all these people involved, who's the parent?
JENNIFER LUDDEN, BYLINE: For thousands of years, there's been no doubt: a woman who gives birth is that child's mother, and her husband, the legal father. But 25 years ago, a challenge to this exploded into a courtroom battle that riveted the nation.
(SOUNDBITE OF THE MOVIE, "BABY M")
LUDDEN: ABC aired this television drama on the Baby M case. A woman was hired to have a baby for a New Jersey couple then changed her mind.
(SOUNDBITE OF THE MOVIE, "BABY M")
LUDDEN: In 1988, New Jersey's Supreme Court declared surrogacy contracts invalid, saying: There are, in a civilized society, some things that money cannot buy. The Baby M case was the first public debate about surrogacy, and its ruling had a profound effect. Many states passed laws to restrict surrogacy. And yet, since then, the practice has exploded with 1,400 babies born to U.S. surrogates in 2010, and likely many more unreported.
MICHELE ZAVOS: Oh, yes. We've got surrogacy companies; we've got the internet. It is a big, big change.
LUDDEN: Michele Zavos is a family law attorney in Maryland, and says the legal issues have only grown more complicated. The surrogate in the Baby M case used her own eggs. But today, nearly all surrogates become pregnant through in-vitro fertilization using another woman's eggs. Sometimes those eggs are from the woman who wants to be a mother, sometimes they're from a donor.
ZAVOS: So, the questions for the courts and for the legislatures are, who is the legal parent and how do we determine that?
LUDDEN: Steve Snyder of the American Bar Association says many family laws were written years, if not decades, ago. Even basic legal terms like biological mother can now seem unclear.
STEVE SNYDER: Well now, if one woman can give birth, and another woman can provide the egg, so what did they mean by biology?
LUDDEN: Snyder and Zavos are among a growing number of lawyers pushing for a broader definition of parent, one based simply on someone's intent.
ZAVOS: Is it somebody who decides to have children with somebody else who acts as a parent throughout a child's life? Is it somebody that the biological or legal parent invites in to be a parent?
LUDDEN: Zavos believes the answer should be yes, yes, yes. A few courts have recognized intent, and some states have passed laws to make surrogacy easier. But the practice is largely unregulated and lawyers are left to work through a tangle of varied and conflicting state laws. Their aim: to create legal parenthood where it never existed. They may use adoption or something called voluntary acknowledgment of paternity. Some states now allow a pre-birth order, which designates the intended parents, and allows their names - instead of the surrogate's - to go on a birth certificate. Attorney Snyder says each case can feel like a puzzle.
SNYDER: So, the question is, like a Rubik's cube, how do we get intended mom on the blue side with all the other blue pieces, and get the surrogate, the yellow piece, off of there?
HAROLD CASSIDY: This is not for some trial judge in a family court to make up law.
LUDDEN: Harold Cassidy was the lawyer for the surrogate in the Baby M case and he still defends surrogates who change their mind. Pregnancy is profound, he says, and in aiming to help infertile couples, legal contracts ignore the rights of the woman who gives birth.
CASSIDY: In many ways these contracts are uninformed because the woman is asked to make a promise to do something before the child's even conceived.
GAIL ROBINSON: The bond and love for the girls that developed was far more powerful than anything I ever expected.
LUDDEN: Gail Robinson is one of Cassidy's clients. In 2005, she agreed to carry twins for her brother and his partner. But after a falling out, she sued for custody. Because part of her case is on appeal, Robinson declined to be interviewed, but agreed to read a statement to NPR.
ROBINSON: The growing sense of moral obligation to my daughters increased as I realized that my daughters needed their mother.
LUDDEN: Robinson lives in New Jersey - the same state where the Baby M case played out and where the law still deems surrogacy invalid. A court found Robinson to be a lawful parent, and late last year she was awarded visitation rights, even though she has no genetic connection to the twins she carried.
SNYDER: The law has not embraced the concept of separating motherhood from giving birth.
LUDDEN: Attorney Steve Snyder says society accepts that sperm or egg donors are not parents. But pregnancy seems sacred.
SNYDER: To believe that a woman can have no remorse or resistance to giving the child up is at direct odds with our societal notion of what motherhood is, even though that was her intent before she ever got pregnant.
LUDDEN: What's more, Snyder says surrogacy generates opposition because it touches on hot-button issues, from abortion to same-sex marriage. Still, attorney Michele Zavos believes the law will eventually recognize those who intend to be parents. After all....
ZAVOS: Technology is leading it, if course it is. People can have children. And the most important thing is that they're going to be a good parent?
LUDDEN: One thing both sides agree on: the need for more legislation to regulate surrogacy. But that's not likely to happen without more consensus on who is a parent.
Jennifer Ludden, NPR News.
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