Get A Key Grip Paul Simon's song "Kodachrome" is reimagined in this musical parody game where contestants are quizzed on movie making jobs.
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Get A Key Grip

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CECIL BALDWIN: This is NPR's ASK ME ANOTHER coming to you from the Nantucket Film Festival. I'm Cecil Baldwin with guest musician Julian Velard. Now here's your host, Ophira Eisenberg.

(APPLAUSE)

OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

Thank you, Cecil. Before the break, we met our contestants Sarah and Michael. Soon they'll play a music parody game about moviemakers you never see, but they still own a yacht.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Let's first check in with our contestants. Sarah, I was very pleased to learn that you are one of the founding members of the Nantucket Curling Club.

SARAH BOIS: Yes.

EISENBERG: All right.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: How did you come to enjoy the fine sport of curling?

BOIS: Well, when you have an ice rink and you're a terrible skater...

EISENBERG: Yes.

BOIS: ...And it's winter on Nantucket....

EISENBERG: And you own a broom.

BOIS: ...And (laughter)...

(LAUGHTER)

BOIS: ...Really good at sweeping...

(LAUGHTER)

BOIS: No, you know, it's a way - you know, just something else to do on the island. And it was kind of one of those bucket list things. You know, hey, curling - you know, the Olympics are soon. I want to try it. And then I fell in love with it. It was really fun, great camaraderie. It's really - it's a fun sport.

EISENBERG: Michael, your job - you know, working in events means that you have produced a lot of extravagant parties over the years with a restaurant group. Do you ever have to book, like, odd people?

MICHAEL STIVER: Oh, yeah. The - what are those basketball people in New York? The...

EISENBERG: The Knicks?

STIVER: The Knicks, yeah - like, the Knicks' dancers.

(LAUGHTER)

STIVER: Like, the New York's Knicks lady dancer cheerleaders.

BALDWIN: The Knicks City Dancers.

STIVER: Knicks City Dancers.

BALDWIN: There you go.

STIVER: Exactly - for a 13-year-old boy's party.

EISENBERG: Sure.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Of course.

STIVER: That's what I'm getting to.

EISENBERG: Julian Velard will perform your musical parody game called Get A Key Grip. Sarah, you won the last game, so you win this, and you are in the final round. Michael, you need to win this, or you have to change your name to Alan Smithee.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Small select audience member get that, and that's fine. Take it away, Julian.

JULIAN VELARD: We rewrote Paul Simon's "Kodachrome" about an old-timey camera film that was once used for cinematography and still photography to be about behind-the-scenes movie jobs. Just ring in, and identify the job that I'm singing about. All right.

(Singing) When I look back, I guess I could have gone to film school. But I had a vision from the start. Like Kurosawa, Tarantino, Kubrick and Gerwig - didn't need no schooling for my art.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Michael.

STIVER: Director.

EISENBERG: That is correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: We also would have accepted egomaniac.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: All right. Here's your next one.

VELARD: (Singing) I might assess the key grip. I might assess the gaffer. But I'm not the worst, and I'm not a girl.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Sarah.

BOIS: Best boy.

EISENBERG: Yeah (laughter), that's right.

(LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Sounds like a sarcastic title the way you say it, Sarah.

(LAUGHTER)

VELARD: (Singing) If you take all the footage shot with all the cameras and give it all to me on intertwine, I will assemble all the shots and make them coherent, build the story you all had in mind.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Sarah.

BOIS: The editor.

EISENBERG: Yeah, exactly.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: I can see it. You guys are, like...

VELARD: (Laughter).

EISENBERG: ...Heavy into the competition right now. You're neck and neck. You're neck and neck. Sarah's pretending she's your friend. She's pretending...

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: ...She's your friend, Michael. I see...

BOIS: He's my best boy.

EISENBERG: He's your best boy.

(LAUGHTER)

VELARD: (Singing) Crash the car. They can't have the actor do it. They need someone more athletic. Toss me that way, and then I'll take his place, oh, yeah.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Michael.

STIVER: Stuntman.

EISENBERG: Yeah.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Although we were looking for stunt-person, but I...

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: ...Suppose we'll accept your version.

STIVER: Stunt-boy?

EISENBERG: Stunt-boy, no.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: No, that is not acceptable, wrong. Sarah, can you steal?

(LAUGHTER)

BOIS: Stunt-lady.

VELARD: (Singing) I work with lots of colors. My canvas is the human face. I'll make you look great or old and sick today.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Sarah.

BOIS: Makeup artist.

EISENBERG: That is correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: This is your last clue.

VELARD: (Singing) What about me? The story's mine. What about me? The plot is mine. What about me? The characters are mine. What about me? The story's mine. I made up every single line. What about me? The characters are mine.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Sarah.

BOIS: The writer.

EISENBERG: OK.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: What is the writer of the movie called?

BOIS: The screenwriter.

EISENBERG: Yeah, the screenwriter.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Also would have accepted narcissist.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Sarah, you won that game, which means you won both games. And you are moving on to our final round.

(APPLAUSE)

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