Great Chemistry As the band Semisonic once said, romance is "All About Chemistry." Ophira and Jonathan read from the Tinder messages of chemical elements that are trying to bond before it's "Closing Time."
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Great Chemistry

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Great Chemistry

Great Chemistry

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OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

Want our next special guest to play for you? Follow ASK ME ANOTHER on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Our next game is about the periodic table of elements. Let's meet our contestants. First up, Zoey Turek. You're currently pursuing your master's in education. Hi.

ZOEY TUREK: Hi.

EISENBERG: When you ring in, we'll hear this.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Your opponent is Ed Beck. You're a product manager at a finance company. Hello.

ED BECK: Hi.

EISENBERG: When you ring in, we'll hear this.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELLS)

EISENBERG: Remember, Zoey and Ed, the first of you who wins two games will move on to our final round. So let's go to your first game. Zoey, what's the spiciest pickup line you've ever heard, or maybe you've delivered yourself?

TUREK: I was sitting in a bar talking to this guy. And he turns around. And I was, like, looking at my phone. And he turns back and says, hey, can you hold this for a second? And I go, yeah, sure, and hold out my hand like you do to hold something. And he just slides his hand in and holds my hand. I was like, that's too soon. Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

TUREK: We're not there yet.

EISENBERG: Nope - unless there's 100.

(LAUGHTER)

TUREK: It was only a two-dollar bill, so it was really weird.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Ed, what is the spiciest pickup line you've ever heard or perhaps delivered yourself?

BECK: So apparently I have a lot of doppelgangers, which I never believe.

EISENBERG: OK.

BECK: But I've been mistaken for, you know, a boyfriend more often than, you know, I'm generally comfortable with. So my response to that was just to be, like, no, I'm not your boyfriend, but I could be.

EISENBERG: Ah. So what you're saying - you walk into some situation. They're like, hey. Someone...

BECK: To react.

EISENBERG: ...That is with someone all of a sudden decides you are that person.

(LAUGHTER)

BECK: Or I'm just - I'm out too late, and everyone's gotten to the point where they're just making those kind of mistakes.

EISENBERG: Oh...

BECK: So...

EISENBERG: OK.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: So as you know, in relationships and in science, it's all about great chemistry. So in this game, we're going to read Tinder messages of elements on the periodic table.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: All you have to do is ring in and name the element that is trying to seduce you. Here we go. You up? Because I'm literally floating. I'm lighter than air. The periodic table may say I'm number two, but I won't blow up on you like hydrogen.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELLS)

EISENBERG: Ed?

BECK: Helium?

EISENBERG: Yeah, that's right.

(APPLAUSE)

JONATHAN COULTON: My favorite "X-Men" character's Quicksilver, my favorite Greek god is Hermes and I'm the only elemental metal that's liquid at room temperature, so that's fun.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELLS)

COULTON: Ed?

BECK: Mercury?

COULTON: You got it - Mercury.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: People think I have a salty personality, but I really only act that way when I'm bonding with chloride.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Zoe?

TUREK: Sodium.

COULTON: Sodium is correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: These guys know their elements.

COULTON: Yeah, I'm impressed. It's true, I love dating - dating brachiopods, dating artifacts - but I'm ready to settle down. You could be my perfect organic me-based life form.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELLS)

COULTON: Ed?

BECK: Carbon?

COULTON: That's right.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: I used to say it all the time - I am done with carbon dating.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: But I love just saying I'm looking for a me-based life form. I think that's the underlying tone of everybody's...

COULTON: I mean, aren't we all?

EISENBERG: ...Tinder (laughter). Yeah, exactly.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: All right, this is your last clue. You think I'm flashy, loud, most comfortable in a tube on an electric sign in Las Vegas, but no - I'm colorless, odorless and inert.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Zoey?

TUREK: Neon.

EISENBERG: Neon is correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: That was a great game, both of you. You know your elements. Ed won that game, and you are one step closer to the final round.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

EISENBERG: Does answering trivia about the periodic table get you out of your electron shell? Well, then you have all the elements to be a contestant on ASK ME ANOTHER. Just go to amatickets.org.

Coming up, we have a brand-new game called Fact Bag. I'll be pulling out facts from a bag.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: So stay tuned. I'm Ophira Eisenberg, and this is ASK ME ANOTHER from NPR.

(APPLAUSE)

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