'True Mom Confessions': I Ate The Marshmallows Romi Lassally's new book gathers together women's confessions of "mommy misdemeanors" — and offers an alternative viewpoint to the idealized notion of how blissful motherhood is supposed to be.

'True Mom Confessions': I Ate The Marshmallows

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And now, we turn to true confessions - true mom confessions, that is. A few years ago, Romi Lassally started a Web site called truemomconfessions.com. She says it gives mothers an outlet for their mommy misdemeanors.

She got the idea after she shared a rather embarrassing parenting moment with a friend, who in turn shared her own red-faced mommy mishap. The idea was to create a safe space for women to talk about the triumphs and the tortures of raising kids, a place to escape from that idealized notion about how blissful motherhood is supposed to be.

Lassally turned those posts into a book called "True Mom Confessions: Real Moms Get Real." And she joins us now to talk about the book from our studios at NPR West.

Welcome to the program.

Ms. ROMI LASSALLY (Author, "True Mom Confessions: Real Moms Get Real"): Thanks, Michele.

NORRIS: Now, you have to tell us about your own mommy mishap that started it all. Late at night, child wakes up, suddenly gets sick.

Ms. LASSALLY: Exactly. Ran downstairs - vomit everywhere, especially on the carpet. Exhausted mother of three left the vomit there, took my kid, went upstairs and just hoped the dog would eat it. And I told the story the next morning to a girlfriend who just winced in disgust, but I think was really marveling at my resourcefulness.

And most importantly, she shared her story. And it became a domino effect of women just spilling the beans and saying what they really feel, which I realized and I, sort of, knew as a mother, we don't get to do this during our days.

There's a huge disconnect between what we say and how we feel and how we present ourselves to the world.

NORRIS: Now, as a journalist, I'm tempted to ask if your strategy worked, if the dog actually - but, you know what? Let's just move on, okay?

(Soundbite of laughter)

Ms. LASSALLY: I'll come back to that one if you like.

NORRIS: No, maybe we should just move on.

Ms. LASSALLY: It's a good housekeeping tip.

NORRIS: I think you just answered the question, actually. So this really is a window into motherhood. What have you learned?

Ms. LASSALLY: Oh, God. I've learned that even in this sort of tell-all culture that we seem to be living in, it's still not easy to say what's on your mind. What we say and what we do is not - there's a big, big gap.

NORRIS: I get mad, one woman writes, when my kids bother me while I am trying to read a book, dash, dash, dash, about being a better parent.

Ms. LASSALLY: That's mine.


(Soundbite of laughter)

NORRIS: You're kidding. Really, you wrote that?

Ms. LASSALLY: I did.

NORRIS: Oh. Busted.

(Soundbite of laughter)

Ms. LASSALLY: And I could have written - and while trying to write a book about being a better parent.

(Soundbite of laughter)

NORRIS: Why don't you share some of your favorites?

Ms. LASSALLY: Okay. The cover confession on the book is: I haven't taught my kids to tell time yet. That way, I can say it's bedtime whenever I want.

I pretend that I shop at Whole Foods because feeding organic food to my family is important, but mostly I just shop there to ogle the tattooed, crunchy, earthy guys.

NORRIS: That was a good one.

Ms. LASSALLY: Let's see. Sometimes I check out my teenage daughter's body and get jealous. Most of the time, though, I'm amazed I made something that is so beautiful.

I joined Weight Watchers just so I could have a place to go by myself once a week.

NORRIS: There are a lot of posts about women just needing some time to themselves…

Ms. LASSALLY: Oh, I think that's…

NORRIS: …the woman who says that she likes to pump gas because it just gives her 10 minutes outside the car.

Ms. LASSALLY: I think that's one of the most common confessions, which is a shame. I wish we could - you know, feel more comfortable self-preserving, you know, rather than feeling selfish that we need just an hour.

NORRIS: But there are also a lot of women who write about finding their self-confidence, reaching inside themselves and finding something to love despite the fact that there's more of them to love after having kids.

Ms. LASSALLY: Right. Right.

NORRIS: I'm thinking of page 83.

Ms. LASSALLY: Oh, I know. I know. I love this one.

NORRIS: Read that one for us.

Ms. LASSALLY: I'm overweight. My stomach is covered with stretch marks and is saggy and squishy from recent weight loss. My boobs are saggy. My hips are disproportionately large. My thighs jiggle. My underarms wave after I stop. And despite all this, I love my body and can't understand why everyone always wants me to change it. I love her.

NORRIS: I bet a lot of women are cheering for her right now, just hearing that.

Ms. LASSALLY: Yup. Yup.

NORRIS: Romi, it's been a pleasure to talk to you. Thanks so much.

Ms. LASSALLY: Thanks, Michele.

NORRIS: Romi Lassally is the author of "True Mom Confessions: Real Moms Get Real." She's also the founding editor of the lifestyle section of the Huffington Post.

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