Check-In: Everything's Hot Ophira Eisenberg and Jonathan Coulton distract themselves from the show's impending end by talking about bagels.

Check-In: Everything's Hot

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JONATHAN COULTON: From NPR and WNYC, coming to you from beautiful Brooklyn, N.Y., it's NPR's hour of puzzles, word games and trivia - ASK ME ANOTHER. I'm Jonathan Coulton. Now here's your host Ophira Eisenberg.


Thanks, Jonathan.

COULTON: You're welcome, Ophira.

EISENBERG: I don't usually do this, but I've been treating myself recently with a bagel. And I will say that I don't generally eat bagels because they're huge. Oh, my God.

COULTON: It's like a cake.

EISENBERG: So I went to the bagel store, and I said to them, which ones are hot? And the guy said everything.

COULTON: Oh, wow.

EISENBERG: And I was like, don't mock...

COULTON: Come on, man.


COULTON: (Laughter).

EISENBERG: Like, I'm not looking for, you know, the sort of, like, everything's good here. What's your best thing on the menu? Everything.

COULTON: Everything. Everything is fantastic.

EISENBERG: Everything's fantastic.

COULTON: Can't go wrong.

EISENBERG: I love all of it. So I sighed beneath my mask.

COULTON: (Laughter).

EISENBERG: And my eyes turned sad. And I said, OK, I'll have a sesame bagel. And he said, why are you getting a sesame bagel when you just asked me what's hot and I said everything?

COULTON: (Laughter) Now I'm getting the joke.

EISENBERG: (Laughter).

COULTON: Now I'm getting the joke.

EISENBERG: Oh, that's a kind of bagel.


COULTON: That is very funny. I didn't - you know what? I should've seen that coming, but I did not see that coming.

EISENBERG: I didn't see it coming.


EISENBERG: I mean, I literally looked at him with this, like, how can you do this to me? I'm chasing after a moment here.

COULTON: (Laughter) Yeah. And I can understand his annoyance, too, 'cause he's like, this lady asked me what's hot, and I tell her, and then she gets something not hot. She's the only person in New York City who wants a not-hot bagel.

EISENBERG: (Laughter) Yeah.

COULTON: What's your oldest bagel? You got any day-olds?

EISENBERG: (Laughter) Right. It would be - and who doesn't love an everything bagel? They're designed to be loved by everyone.

COULTON: The best. You always get - you get a dozen bagels for your party.


COULTON: You get, like, six to eight everythings as part of that dozen. And then you get, like, one egg for the weirdo.


COULTON: You know, like...

EISENBERG: Yes. So I got my everything bagel, and I bit into it, and it was hot. And then steam came out from inside of it because that's how hot it was. And...

COULTON: It's...

EISENBERG: ...For a brief moment, I was like - you know what? - we're all going to make it through. It's going...




EISENBERG: I will just say that part of the motivation of getting the bagel for the soothing is because I'm trying to distract myself from the fact that this is our second-to-last show. So we're just going to play some fun games and joke around with a bunch of our friends that we love to distract ourselves. And then, you know, we're going to invite them back for our final episode next week.

COULTON: That's right. We'll all say goodbye together.

EISENBERG: (Laughter) All right. So I'm going to take another bite of the bagel. Let's do this.

COULTON: I know what you're saying. Let's do it.

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