Opening Panel Round Our panelists answer questions about the week's news: What Crazy Cat Ladies Want.
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Opening Panel Round

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Opening Panel Round

Opening Panel Round

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PETER SAGAL, Host:

We want to remind everybody they can join us most weeks back at the Chase Bank Auditorium in Chicago, Illinois. For tickets and more information, you can go to wbez.org or you can find a link at our website, waitwait.npr.org. Right now, panel, time for you to answer some questions about this week's news.

Adam, according to a new study, nine out of ten cat owners are what?

ADAM FELBER: Other cats.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

FELBER: It's tragic and it needs to be stopped.

SAGAL: Exactly.

FELBER: Feline trafficking among felines is...

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

FELBER: I'm glad we brought this up, because I do a lot of volunteer work in this arena.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

FELBER: I try to counsel cats about this.

SAGAL: The cats owned by other cats.

FELBER: Yes, let them know that heritage be damned, they have other choices.

SAGAL: That's true.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

FELBER: Okay, let's go back. Nine out of ten cat owners are?

SAGAL: Are what?

FELBER: I'm going to need a hint.

SAGAL: I wish I could eat Fancy Feast and nap all day.

FELBER: Jealous of their cats.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PAULA POUNDSTONE: Again, where do you get this information?

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: I will tell you.

FELBER: You asked ten people.

SAGAL: Nine out of ten cat owners are jealous of their cats. We also would have accepted sad and alone.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The survey, conducted by the respected research firm Whiskas.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

FELBER: They do great work.

SAGAL: Yes, in social science. Finds that most cat owners envy their cat's lazy days and vomit-wherever-I-want attitude.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Some cat owners are taking this attitude to heart. They're installing a giant sand box in the bathroom, or replacing their bathtub fixtures with a giant raspy tongue.

TOM BODETT: Oh, to hack up a hairball, you know.

SAGAL: Oh man.

POUNDSTONE: Yeah, that's living.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

POUNDSTONE: I am a multiple cat owner. I'm neither lonely nor alone. Let's see, I am not jealous of my cats.

BODETT: Did you ever want to pee on your own shoes?

POUNDSTONE: I have peed on my own shoes.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

POUNDSTONE: How do you think you teach your cats to do that?

FELBER: Yeah.

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