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Lightning Fill In The Blank

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Lightning Fill In The Blank

Lightning Fill In The Blank

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PETER SAGAL, HOST:

It is now time for our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Paula and Roy each have 3. Tom has 2.

SAGAL: All right. So Tom is starting and then will be Paula and Roy.

Tom, you're in third place. You're up first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. This week, Dilma Rousseff, the president of blank, was removed from office.

TOM BODETT: Brazil.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, Pope Francis announced he would visit the town in Italy that was devastated by blank.

BODETT: The earthquake.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: For the first time in over 50 years, scheduled commercial airline service resumed between the U.S. and blank.

BODETT: Cuba.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A woman in Oregon had the most popular senior pictures in her class after everyone noticed blank.

BODETT: She wasn't wearing clothes.

SAGAL: No, but the guy behind her and his dog weren't.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Following outrage over a 400 percent price hike, pharmaceutical company Mylan announced they have released a generic version of the blank.

BODETT: The EpiPen

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Best known for his work with Mel Brooks and his title role in the "Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory," blank passed away at the age of 83.

BODETT: Gene Wilder.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A group of thieves in New Zealand who stole a box marked chemicals, thinking it was drug-making supplies, later discovered they had actually stolen blank.

BODETT: Chemicals.

SAGAL: No.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: They stole 16 bottles of oil extracted from the anal glands of weasels.

BODETT: Oh.

(LAUGHTER)

BODETT: You know, on the black market...

SAGAL: Oh, yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The thieves spotted this box inside of a truck and waited until sundown before they broke the window and stole it. Unfortunately, the truck belonged to the conservation group Goodnature, who were in the process of doing research on the incredibly smelly oil secreted from a weasel's anal gland.

ROY BLOUNT JR: Oh, God. And the weasels said, here they come again.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Tom do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Five right, 10 more points, 12 total, and he has the lead.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: All right. We have flipped a coin. Paula has elected to go last. Roy, you are up next. Fill in the blank. On Tuesday, Meg Whitman became the first high-profile Republican to publicly campaign for blank.

BLOUNT JR: For Hillary Clinton.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, President Obama commuted the sentences of over 100 more federal inmates serving time for blank charges.

BLOUNT JR: For nonviolent drug charges.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, Russia claimed that an airstrike in Syria killed one of the founders of blank.

BLOUNT JR: ISIS.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a family in Turkey got food poisoning at a dinner they held to celebrate blank.

BLOUNT JR: Probably something highly ironic, right?

SAGAL: Indeed.

(LAUGHTER)

BLOUNT JR: Celebrating Alka-Seltzer.

SAGAL: No. A dinner they threw to celebrate the family's recovering from food poisoning.

BLOUNT JR: Oh.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, Australian geologists reported that they may have found the oldest blanks ever discovered.

BLOUNT JR: Fossils.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, The Wall Street Journal reported that Google was planning to launch its own blank service.

BLOUNT JR: Car pick-up.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a sheriff's department in Florida caught a man trying to fool a urine drug test by blanking.

BLOUNT JR: Fool your blood test by using lemonade.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: You are so close. I'm just going to give it to you.

BLOUNT JR: Oh.

SAGAL: What he used...

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: ...Was warm, refreshing Mountain Dew.

BLOUNT JR: Mountain Dew.

(LAUGHTER)

BODETT: That might work.

SAGAL: He tried - this guy, who had to do a court-ordered drug test, filled his radiator hose with Mountain Dew. And he tried to fill up the cup surreptitiously.

BLOUNT JR: Fill his radiator hose? Why did he do that?

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Well, he used it - I mean, he used it as a sort of carrying device, if you will.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: He didn't put it in the radiator.

BLOUNT JR: No.

SAGAL: That'd be dumb.

BLOUNT JR: No.

SAGAL: So...

PAULA POUNDSTONE: I was going to say, you do a drug test and you - well, hold on a minute, let's go out to my car.

SAGAL: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Roy do on our quiz?

KURTIS: He got six right, 12 more points. And he slipped into the lead with 15.

POUNDSTONE: Oh, boy.

BODETT: All right.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Well done. All right. This, then, will be for the game. How many does Paula need to win?

KURTIS: Six to tie, and seven to win.

SAGAL: OK, Paula, this is for the game. Fill in the blank. This week, the FBI announced they had recovered 30 additional emails from Hillary Clinton about the 2012 attack on blank.

POUNDSTONE: Benghazi.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Sunday, a new report showed that enrollment in blank was less than half of projected levels.

POUNDSTONE: Affordable Care Act?

SAGAL: Yeah, known as Obamacare.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, the Supreme Court denied North Carolina's request to reinstate their blank law.

POUNDSTONE: Their voter ID law.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Despite criticism, San Francisco 49ers quarterback, Colin Kaepernick, says he'll continue to sit during the blank.

POUNDSTONE: The national anthem.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, police said they were able to track down and arrest a man behind two robberies in Wisconsin because he blanked during them.

POUNDSTONE: Because he put - took pictures of himself and put them on Facebook.

SAGAL: Almost, he wore a T-shirt with his name on it while he committed the crimes.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: This week, health officials in Florida said that Hurricane Hermine could hamper the state's fight against blank.

POUNDSTONE: Zika.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A 4-year-old in Canada had his birthday wish come true when his mom made him a cake featuring blank.

POUNDSTONE: Oh - no idea.

SAGAL: A cow giving birth.

(LAUGHTER)

POUNDSTONE: Sure that's every kid's dream cake decoration...

SAGAL: Jamie Packard said her 4-year-old son was very specific about everything he wanted for his party - presents, guest list. Most importantly, he wanted the cake featuring a calving cow. Ms. Packard made the cake herself with green frosting for the grass, Rice Krispie treats for the hooves, and, this is completely true, cherry pie filling as the placenta.

(LAUGHTER)

UNIDENTIFIED MAN: Woo.

SAGAL: I hope that guy was whooping for the cherry pie and not the placenta.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Paula Poundstone do well enough to win?

KURTIS: Got five right, 10 more points. But her 13 still trails Roy.

POUNDSTONE: Woah, my gosh, there it is.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Roy Blount...

KURTIS: This winner this week.

(APPLAUSE)

POUNDSTONE: A bit of rivalry.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: In just a minute, we're going to ask our panelists to predict, how will Hillary Clinton get the spotlight back on her after Trump's big trip to Mexico?

But first, let me tell you that support for NPR comes from NPR stations and Lumber Liquidators, a proud sponsor of NPR, offering more than 400 styles, including hardwood, bamboo, laminate and vinyl, with flooring specialists and hundreds of stores nationwide. More at lumberliquidators.com or 1-800-HARDWOOD.

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WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME is a production of NPR and WBEZ Chicago in association with Urgent Haircut Productions, Doug Formerly Massachusetts Berman, benevolent overlord. Phillipp Goedicke writes our limericks. Our intern is Alex Build The Wall Achy. Our web guru is Beth Novey. Special thanks to Chris Roo-Ee (ph) Gomez and the crew here at Tanglewood. BJ Leiderman composed our theme.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Our program is produced my Robin Linn and Miles Dornboss. Technical direction is from Lorna White. Our CFO is Ann Nguyen. Our production coordinator is Mr. Robert Neuhaus. And senior producer is the Ian Chillag. And the executive producer of WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME is Mr. Michael Danforth.

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