PETER SAGAL, HOST:
In just a minute, we're going to ask our panelists to predict what the Russian Winter Olympic athletes will do now that they can't compete at the Winter Olympics. But first let me tell you that support for NPR comes from NPR stations and Hanes, donating 200,000 pairs of socks to those in need and more than 2.1 million pairs since 2009. Information about a day in the life of a person experiencing homelessness is at hanes.com/sockdrive.
The University of Maryland Libraries, home to the NPR archives and dedicated to transforming the student experience and educating the next generation of global citizens. The University of Maryland - fearless ideas. And Dana-Farber Cancer Institute, where physician researchers are working to create vaccines to enable a person's immune system to stop melanoma and other cancers. More at dana-farber.org/defeatcancer.
Special thanks this week to Revival Food Hall in downtown Chicago for feeding us. WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME is a production of NPR and WBEZ Chicago in association with Urgent Haircut Productions - Doug Berman, benevolent overlord. Philipp Goedicke writes our limericks. Our public address announcer is Paul Friedman. Our house manager is Tyler Greene. Our web guru is Beth Novey. Our interns are Gianna Capadona and, unfortunately for the last time, Katie O'Reilly (ph). Katie, you were always cheerful, hardworking and delightful to have around. Thanks for everything you did for us. And as you go out into the real world, remember, most offices won't encourage you to talk like that.
SAGAL: B.J. Leiderman composed our theme. Our program is produced by Jennifer Mills and Miles Doornbos. Technical direction is from Lorna White. Our CFO is Colin Miller. Our production coordinator is Robert Neuhaus. Our senior producer is Ian Chillag. And the executive producer of WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME is Mr. Michael Danforth. Now, panel, what will the Russian athletes do now that they're not going to the Olympics? Faith Salie.
FAITH SALIE: They're going to hold a homegrown Olympics with signature Putin feats like bear tranquillizing, shirtless dressage and tandem political rival poisoning.
SAGAL: P.J. O'Rourke.
P. J. O'ROURKE: Well, Peter, one industry that's even more profitable than athletics is pharmaceuticals.
SAGAL: And Paula Poundstone.
PAULA POUNDSTONE: They're going to Photoshop themselves into films of the events, being first over the finish lines, hefting the heaviest weights and twirling the most on ice and put them into Facebook ads.
BILL KURTIS: Well if any of that happens, panel, we'll ask you about it on WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME.
SAGAL: Thank you, Bill Kurtis. Thanks also to Faith Salie, P.J. O'Rourke and Paula Poundstone. Thanks to all of you for listening. I'm Peter Sagal. And we'll be back with you next week.
SAGAL: This is NPR.
NPR transcripts are created on a rush deadline by Verb8tm, Inc., an NPR contractor, and produced using a proprietary transcription process developed with NPR. This text may not be in its final form and may be updated or revised in the future. Accuracy and availability may vary. The authoritative record of NPR’s programming is the audio record.