Meat And Three In this word game based on the classic southern meal, "meat and three," contestants mash up foods and famous trios.
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Meat And Three

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Meat And Three

Meat And Three

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JONATHAN COULTON: From NPR and WNYC, coming to you from TPAC's Polk theater in Nashville, Tenn., it's NPR's hour of puzzles, word games and trivia, ASK ME ANOTHER. I'm Jonathan Coulton. Now here's your host, Ophira Eisenberg.

(APPLAUSE)

OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

Hello, hi. It's so nice to be here. And, you know, we usually perform in Brooklyn. We live in New York, but Nashville is getting trendy in Brooklyn. It's true. We now have places that sell hot chicken. But in Brooklyn, it's called Bikram chicken.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: We have two amazing guests, country music stars Trace Adkins and Carlene Carter.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Yeah, I know. (Laughter). Trace Adkins summed up a lot of my life with his hit, "I Left Something Turned On At Home." Yeah, for me it's the stove. For him, it's a woman...

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: ...Which must be great because then he can call that woman and get her to check if he left the stove on.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: It'd be amazing to have that. And Carlene Carter is here.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Yeah, I can't wait to talk to her. We can relate about the fact that we both have famous families. Hers, obviously for music, mine for passive aggression.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: So Nashville's also known as the bachelorette party capital, huh?

(BOOING)

EISENBERG: Yeah, interesting. (Laughter). A lot of guys booing, interesting. Yeah, you know, I will tell you. I also have been to some bachelorettes where they have male strippers. But, you know, it's not the same, I imagine. It's not the same. I don't think women get out of that the same way that guys enjoy it, you know, because the problem with male strippers is they like that job.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: They're into it. They're very confident. There's nothing worse than a stripper who's into it. Like, if I want to see a male stripper, I want to see a guy that's broken down. I want to see vulnerability. I want to see shame. During his dance, I want him to, like, cry a little and then apologize. He takes off his clothes. He folds them up nicely on the stage.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: I'd get a lap dance. It would just be him saying things to me like, I could never deserve a girl like you.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: And, I think women are really funny. And I tip him extra because I want him to make his way through chef school, you know?

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: It's a dream. It's a dream. All right, let's play some games, everybody.

(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "TENNESSEE SONG")

MARGO PRICE: (Singing) Let's go back to Tennessee. Let's go back.

EISENBERG: Our first two contestants will play a game that mixes well-known trios and foods. I call it Menage A Twaffle (ph). Let's meet them. First up, Christa Cruikshank. You're an environmental engineer and a recent world pun championship competitor.

CHRISTA CRUIKSHANK: That is correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: What's one of your proudest puns?

CRUIKSHANK: We have this joke, 185 blanks walk into a bar. So it was 185 horses walk into a bar. And the bartender said, no, we don't want any bridal parties here.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Nice. Yep.

COULTON: It's pretty good. That's solid.

EISENBERG: That is a totally solid one. Christa, when you ring in, we'll hear this.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Your opponent is Elizabeth Harrell. You're a middle school music teacher. And you're learning to tap dance. How is that going?

ELIZABETH HARRELL: It's going very well.

EISENBERG: It's fun, right?

HARRELL: Yes. I'm in a class with 13 to 18-year-olds. I am twice their age.

(LAUGHTER)

HARRELL: Yes.

EISENBERG: Why didn't you take an adult class?

HARRELL: I'm quote, unquote "auditing" the class.

EISENBERG: I see. I see. And do you feel like, you know, you keep up pretty - you're learning the steps?

HARRELL: I'd say so. I will - at the beginning I noticed their balance was a lot better than mine.

EISENBERG: Well, they're not drunk.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: All right, Elizabeth, when you ring in, we'll hear this.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Christa and Elizabeth, whoever has more points after two games will go to our Final Round. Our first game is inspired by a classic southern meal with Nashville roots, Meat and Three. That's a protein...

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: ...With three side dishes. Yeah, I'll clap for Meat and Three, fantastic, of course. But in our Meat and Three, we're mashing up foods with famous trios.

COULTON: For example, if I said nobody wants to eat lunch with the band that recorded "All The Small Things" because they ordered stinky canned fish and cheese sandwiches, you would answer, Blink 180-tuna melt.

EISENBERG: And here we go. These fairy tale swine siblings thought the Big Bad Wolf was trouble. But they didn't experience true suffering until they were turned into mini hotdogs, wrapped in dough and baked to a crisp.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Christa.

CRUIKSHANK: Three Little Pigs in a blanket?

EISENBERG: Yes, indeed.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: Before there was Hanson, there was this trio of brothers, known for performing "Stayin' Alive," "Night Fever" and an ode to a sprayable, spreadable dairy product in an aerosol can.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Elizabeth.

HARRELL: Bee Gees-it. OK, wait. Easy Cheese, Bee Gee-Easy Cheese.

COULTON: Yeah, you got it.

HARRELL: OK. OK, yay. (Laughter).

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: That was the very definition of grit, right there. She just kept going.

HARRELL: (Laughter).

EISENBERG: Exactly. In this dark comedy, Bette Midler, Goldie Hawn and Diane Keaton vow to get revenge on their ex-husbands by slathering them with mayo, adding bacon and turkey and cutting them into quarters.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Elizabeth.

HARRELL: The First Wives Club sandwich.

EISENBERG: Exactly.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: This is your last clue. In 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue on these three ships, in search of a green vegetable to make his pee smell weird.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Christa.

CRUIKSHANK: Pinto, Santa Maria-asparagus. So let's see, the - yeah, no.

COULTON: OK, I have to go to Elizabeth. Elizabeth, do you know the answer?

HARRELL: The Nina, the Pinta, the Santa Maria-asparagus.

COULTON: Yeah, that's correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: All right. Close game, but Elizabeth is in the lead.

(SOUNDBITE OF CHRIS STAPLETON'S "TENNESSEE WHISKEY")

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