Remember the Something-O In an ode to The Alamo, contestants answer every question with a word that ends in the letter 'O.'
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Remember the Something-O

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Remember the Something-O

Remember the Something-O

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JONATHAN COULTON: From NPR and WNYC, coming to you from the Aztec Theatre in San Antonio, Texas...

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: ...It's NPR's hour of puzzles, word games and trivia, ASK ME ANOTHER. I'm Jonathan Coulton. Now here's your host, Ophira Eisenberg.

(APPLAUSE)

OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

Hello, everybody. This is so exciting. We have an amazing show for you. We have four brilliant contestants. They are backstage. They just told me that the Alamo is not where I return my rental car.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: And they will be up here playing some games with us, and one of them will become our big winner. And I got to say that we are here to mess with Texas.

(CHEERING)

EISENBERG: Right, Jonathan? Are we messing with Texas?

COULTON: We're going to mess it all up.

EISENBERG: (Laughter) I was actually surprised to hear - like, I think it's kind of a tough guy, macho slogan - don't mess with Texas - but it's from an anti-littering campaign. That is so adorable. That is so sweet. Does the bouncer down the street with that tattooed on his bicep know that? Does he know that? No, he doesn't know that.

Are you sick of talking about the Alamo? Are you sick of it? No, you're OK? Some people yes, some people no. I get it. We all remember the Alamo, but here's my question. If you forget, what security questions do you get asked?

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Where did you spend New Year's 1845? What's your favorite Mexican general's maiden name? Who's Davy Crockett's best friend?

And I also checked out the San Antonio Riverwalk - very nice, beautiful. Here I thought riverwalking was like a Jesus-only event - turns out also drunk guys named Tyler.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: And our special guest is singer-songwriter Robert Earl Keen.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: He has a great, very popular song about awkward family gatherings, "Merry Christmas From The Family." I don't know about your family, but when my family gets together, we can't even call it Christmas. We have to call it battle royale. I love the first line of his song. It goes, mom got drunk. Dad got drunk. I wish all holiday songs were that realistic.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Right? Like, have yourself a merry little Christmas, but if not, that's totally understandable. I get it. Makes sense. I won't be home for Christmas if I can help it. And my favorite, do you hear what I hear? That's my cousin telling me how much money he made last year.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: All right, let's play some games, everybody.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

EISENBERG: It would be cliche to come to San Antonio and do a game about the Alamo, right? Wrong. It would be extremely cliche, and that's why we're doing it. So let's meet our contestants. First up, Stevie Tardiff. You are a middle school theater teacher, and you love the Texas grocery chain H-E-B.

STEVIE TARDIFF: Yes.

(CHEERING)

EISENBERG: What is so great about this chain?

TARDIFF: They love Texas, No. 1. They have the best produce because it's locally sourced. They have coffee flavors based on Texas towns that are delicious. They have tortilla chips shaped like Texas.

(CHEERING)

TARDIFF: It's amazing. I love it.

EISENBERG: Stevie, when you ring in, we'll hear this.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Your opponent is Clairissa Simmons. You work for an educational technology company, and you work on an app that helps teachers practice for their certification tests.

CLAIRISSA SIMMONS: Yep, we help teachers study.

EISENBERG: OK, so you know all about taking apart quizzes.

SIMMONS: Yes.

EISENBERG: OK.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: If you're reworking questions to make them more effective, what - what's the best strategy?

SIMMONS: Pretend to be really dumb.

EISENBERG: As obvious as possible. Clairissa, when you ring in, we'll hear this.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Stevie and Clairissa, whoever has more points after two games will go to our final round. So we're within walking distance of the Alamo, so it's only right to start things off with a word game called Remember the Something-O.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: It's easy. Every answer is three syllables and ends with the letter O. However, you must answer in the form of remember the Alamo.

COULTON: So if we said, I forget, what would you call a piece of the most popular breakfast cereal in the United States? You would answer, remember the Cheerio.

EISENBERG: OK. Yeah, that's right.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Here we go. I forget, what's that small woodwind instrument that's half the size of a flute? Ironically, one of "Dragon Ball Z's" biggest fighters is named after it.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Stevie.

TARDIFF: Remember the piccolo.

EISENBERG: That is correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: An instrument made just to body shame flutes.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: I forget, what's that majestic shaggy-haired mammal with horns that used to roam the Western plains and is now ground up to make burgers?

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Stevie.

TARDIFF: Remember the buffalo.

COULTON: Yeah, that's right.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: I forget, what's the short name for the surgical procedure involving a hollow needle that can tell you the sex of a fetus?

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: I know it seems like a weird question for me to ask, but I just - just slipped my mind.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Stevie.

TARDIFF: Remember the embryo.

COULTON: (Laughter) Sorry, that is incorrect.

(LAUGHTER)

TARDIFF: OK.

COULTON: You knew it when you said it.

TARDIFF: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: Clairissa, do you have the answer?

SIMMONS: Remember the in vitro.

COULTON: We were looking for remember the amnio.

TARDIFF: OK.

EISENBERG: Yeah. If you've had one, you would remember.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: They are not as fun as a gender reveal cake, I'm just going to say.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: I forget, who was that Roman orator who greatly influenced the Latin language and was also consul of the Roman Republic in 63 B.C.?

EISENBERG: It's also in the musical "Chicago" - pop, six, squish.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Oh, Stevie.

TARDIFF: Remember the Cicero.

EISENBERG: Yeah.

COULTON: Yeah, that's right.

(APPLAUSE)

TARDIFF: Keep those theater quizzes coming (ph).

EISENBERG: There you go, yes. This is your last clue. I forget, what's the name of that pen and paper game played on a three-by-three grid, the one that will always end in a draw if you play perfectly, but your nephews never do so you win every time?

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Clairissa.

SIMMONS: Remember the tic-tac-toe.

EISENBERG: That is correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: All right, great game. And Stevie is in the lead.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

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