Bluff The Listener Our panelists read three stories about a trendy new aphrodisiac, only one of which is true.
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Bluff The Listener

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Bluff The Listener

Bluff The Listener

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BILL KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME, the NPR news quiz. I'm Bill Kurtis. We are playing this week with Joel Kim Booster, Paula Poundstone and Roxanne Roberts. And here again is your host at the Chase Bank Auditorium in downtown Chicago, Peter Sagal.

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Thank you, Bill.

(CHEERING, APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Thank you so much. It's time for the WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME Bluff the Listener game. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to play our game in the air. Before we get to that, we are very excited to announce The Wait Wait... Stand-Up Tour. You love our panelists. And now you can see them without all those pesky FCC rules and regulations. Our first show is coming up on Friday, February 28 in Austin, Texas. There you can see Maz Jobrani, Alonzo Bodden, Helen Hong and Maeve Higgins at the Paramount Theatre in Austin for a night of live comedy. Tickets are on sale right now at austintheatre.org.

Hey, it's time to pay the Bluff game. Hi, you are on WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME.

MIKE MADZER: Hi. This is Mike from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan in Canada.

SAGAL: Saskatoon?

(CHEERING)

MADZER: Yeah.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: So what do you do there in Saskatoon?

MADZER: I am a records clerk for the federal government.

SAGAL: For the federal government of Canada?

MADZER: That is correct.

SAGAL: Yes.

MADZER: So I don't have to worry about the government shutting down because they run out of money or anything.

SAGAL: Oh, no, no.

(OOHING)

JOEL KIM BOOSTER: Oh, OK.

SAGAL: Stop lording it over us, you haughty Canadian.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Welcome to our show, Mike. You're going to play the game...

MADZER: Thank you.

SAGAL: ...In which you must try to tell truth from fiction. Bill, what's Mike's topic?

KURTIS: I'm in the mood, Peter.

SAGAL: Everybody has their trusted aphrodisiacs - maybe oysters, maybe champagne - maybe for Devin Nunes, nude photos of Donald Trump. This week, we heard about something new getting people in the mood. Our panelists are going to tell you about it. Pick the one who's telling the truth. And you'll win the WAIT WAITer of your choice on your voicemail. Are you ready to play?

MADZER: Yes, absolutely.

SAGAL: All right. First, let's hear from Roxanne Roberts.

ROXANNE ROBERTS: The way to a man's heart - well, not his heart, but this is public radio...

(LAUGHTER)

ROBERTS: ...Isn't sexy underwear or talking dirty. The real aphrodisiac, especially for young singles, is chicken Parmigiana.

(LAUGHTER)

ROBERTS: Carly Spiewak tells The New York Post that she first noticed the trend on dating app Hinge, where a number of men mentioned the classic Italian meal as the perfect date dish. Parm superfan Jonny Adler, 25, explains that this is chicken Parm season, which starts in October, peaks during the holidays and lasts until May, when singles want comfort food. Quote, "We see a lot of first dates," says Jeff Zalaznick, owner of Parm Italian restaurant. Although other singles believe the dish isn't appropriate until the third or fourth date...

(LAUGHTER)

ROBERTS: ...Which brings us to the real question, do you like your Parm with chicken breasts or chicken thighs?

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Chicken Parmesan is a thing that's getting everybody hot and heavy. That's from Roxanne. From Joel Kim Booster, here is your next story of a sure thing.

BOOSTER: While a pimple has not been traditionally associated with love and romance, a new study suggests that for some people, popping a zit or even a carbuncle is the new chocolate and oysters. I know it's gross, Katie Loraita (ph) says of her newfound aphrodisiac. But whenever I see a big, juicy zit on my husband's nose, and I bust it open, it's like, I did that. And power is sexy.

(LAUGHTER)

BOOSTER: While this method of arousal works wonders for Katie, her husband sees things a little bit differently. It made me dread sex, he confided flatly.

(LAUGHTER)

BOOSTER: I used to say I'd do anything to get her in the mood. But now when I see her get that look in her eyes, I tell her I'm tired, cover up my entire body with the blanket and hope she thinks I'm asleep.

(LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Popping pimples is what turns some people on. Your last story of a new way to get in the mood comes from Paula Poundstone.

PAULA POUNDSTONE: Studies find that attending an auction creates sexual desire. According to surveys of auction goers, after a nerve-racking $18.5 million bid on a Qing (ph) dynasty face was surpassed by a breathtaking $19 million bid, over 60% of the attendees engaged in sexual congress within 60 minutes of the auction's close, within a 12-mile radius of the auction house.

POUNDSTONE: After a David Cassidy guitar, used in the taping of "The Partridge Family" episode when Danny tried to go solo, held at a price of $2,250 at a Sotheby's auction and skipped up to $2,500 a split second before the gavel landed at, going three times, a whopping 70% of auction attendees climaxed, often yelling sold within 30 minutes of the auction's close, within a seven-mile radius of the auction house. Among silent auction attendees at the John Muir Middle School in Venice, Calif., where a strong $50 bid for lunch with the principal was eclipsed by a $50.50 bid just before the auctions closed, 21% engaged in intense hugging with their partners within 48 hours of the auction's close, within a three-mile radius of the school cafeteria. When one considers that these were parents of middle school students, it's out and out hot.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: So one of these three things, we are reliably told, is the new thing to get people in the mood for romance. Is it, from Roxanne Roberts, chicken parmesan, of all things; from Joel, popping pimples; or from Paula Poundstone, bidding at auctions? Which of these is the thing that is the new aphrodisiac?

MADZER: Now, Paula's story was very convincing, but I think I'm going to have to go with the Parmesan.

SAGAL: Chicken Parmesan.

MADZER: Yeah.

SAGAL: That's probably - probably makes sense in Canada anyway. All right. You've chosen Roxanne's story of chicken Parmesan. Well, we spoke to somebody who actually has reported on this remarkable new trend in dating.

SUZY WEISS: There's a chicken dish for every part of our romantic lives. And New York City cannot get enough of chicken Parmesan.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: That was Suzy Weiss - she's the features reporter at the New York Post - talking about her story about chicken Parm amongst the singles.

Congratulations, Mike. You got it right. You earned a point for Roxanne, which she always appreciates.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: But you've won our prize.

(APPLAUSE)

MADZER: Thank you so much.

SAGAL: So when you're going out doing the various things you do in Saskatoon, one of us will answer your phone for you.

Congratulations.

MADZER: Thank you so much.

(SOUNDBITE OF UNIDENTIFIED SONG)

UNIDENTIFIED PERSON: (Singing) Chicken Parmesan, you've got it going on. Chicken Parmesan.

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